Crime & Punishment

Now with 100% more allowed Chat logs!

This thread is the only place where players can post chatlogs (with the names of victims/counterparts blanked out) as part of a pirate story or experience.

I look forward to many good Yarrs!

This was just your average can flipping.

What made this special is the total over reaction of this guy.

I was on my way back to my home station and as i normally do I run a quick directional through the belts to see what is there.

I see a Covetor and a can so i warp to belt flip an and he promptly leaves. Only to come back with a badger and then
promptly loose his badger. At this point most people dock up for the rest of the 15 minutes so i pop the can and wreck
to get back on route.

I had to do a double take since this guy warps back into the same belt with his Covetor and start mining again.
Needless to say, he lost that ship as well.

Then he convos me...

*Sorry if the cuss filter does not work. It might have crashed due to all the **** it had to add.



[20:16:27] Victim; ur a ****ing ******
[20:16:43] Cannibal Kane ; i gave you a choice
[20:16:52] Cannibal Kane ; you took the wrong one
[20:16:59] Victim; no u didnt u *****
[20:17:09] Victim; ur a studipid little kid
[20:17:33] Cannibal Kane ; *stupid
[20:17:43] Victim; i dont have ****ing isk cuz im not a ****ing *** that lives off this game like its my real life
[20:18:12] Cannibal Kane ; good one... yet your the one crying about a loss
[20:18:36] Victim; u stupid dumb ****ing *** i wish i knew what u looked like i dont give a **** if i go to jail i wanna cripple u u ****ing stupid little kid
[20:18:50] Victim; **** u
[20:19:04] Cannibal Kane ; wow.... internet space ships are serious busniess huh?
[20:19:06] Victim; go **** ur mother u ***** faggoot
[20:19:43] Cannibal Kane ; would you like a carebear hug?
[20:19:54] Victim; i hope ur mother gets rapped and killed
[20:20:07] Victim; go **** ur mother
[20:20:29] Cannibal Kane ; you said that one already.. dig a bit deaper in your repretuar of insults
[20:21:08] Victim; and go jump off a bridge i hope u get beat up and wen u do remember me id ****ing kill u u ****ing ****** id **** ur mom infront of you
[20:21:23] Victim; go **** ur mother
[20:21:24] Cannibal Kane ; a little more....
[20:21:32] Cannibal Kane ; then breath deep and breath out
[20:21:33] Victim; go **** your mother
[20:21:57] Cannibal Kane ; if you hurry you can get a nother ship to loose?
[20:22:39] Victim; lol ur a stupid kid i ****ing cant belive the **** ull go though while growing up . ull get hit soo ****ing hard u wont remember your name or ull be made fun of
[20:23:16] Cannibal Kane ; yep... you hit the spot right there... but you don;t see my crying over internet space ships....
[20:23:29] Cannibal Kane ; you sure your not talking to yourself in the mirror right now?
[20:23:39] Cannibal Kane ; and accidently typing it in here
[20:23:45] Victim; go get me 20 mil
[20:24:06] Victim; i want 20 mill
[20:24:13] Cannibal Kane ; i;ll drop it in my can right here.. go get a ship quicly to pick it up
[20:25:31] Victim; you think this is funny? youu shouldnt **** with people youu dont know. i suggest you get me 20 mill and we call it even.
[20:26:02] Cannibal Kane ; how about you give me 20 mil... for my trouble and for wasting my ammo on you
[20:26:29] Victim; do you live in america or canada
[20:26:38] Cannibal Kane ; canada
[20:26:48] Victim; where in canada
[20:27:07] Victim; ??
[20:27:18] Cannibal Kane ; toronto
[20:27:36] Victim; yeah right
[20:27:51] Victim; hey r u busy today?

At this point his tone changes, I don't really live in Canada, but google is awesome when you want to find out about places.

[20:28:01] Cannibal Kane ; not really
[20:28:09] Cannibal Kane ; just shooting at idiots
[20:28:59] Victim; wanna meet me at the timmies on jane n finch at around 8 pm
[20:29:41] Cannibal Kane ; im on the other side of north york
[20:29:58] Cannibal Kane ; but sure
[20:32:24] Victim; dude dont even bother, stick to ur video games man i feel bad ****ing up a kid cuz of a game, but i just want you to know u relly pissed me off still. and dont go to that area cuz if i c a little white kid ill punch u
[20:32:52] Cannibal Kane ; you a strong manly man.... give me my 20mil
[20:33:02] Victim; lol
[20:33:18] Victim; nice battle little kid next time ill put up a fight

At the end he seems less tense about his loss.

http://i.imgur.com/qq26N.jpg
is this pirate enough for you?

I'm new to ninja salvaging but if I keep getting hits like this I'm sure I'll be at it for awhile.

I pinpointed a Raven running a mission. Sure, I'll take on a raven. As I warp to the spot I also pick up a rupture on D-scan. Hey, two for the price of one, why not. I landed in their room about 30k from the raven and 10k from the rupture. There were about 5 npc BS's pounding on the raven already. I approach nearest wreck and start looting. Almost immediately the rupture fires at me. I didn't really care about the rupture, I wanted that raven so I change my path to approach the raven. Sure enough, he fires about 30 sec later. Point, web and drones go on rupture. He melts in seconds. All attention goes to raven. I barely had time to even type a ransom, let alone time for him to pay. Down goes both ships. Tears immediately follow.

Raven > you're a cocks****r Eon, you know that?
Eon Raptor > you attacked me first
Eon Raptor > I was just collecting space trash
Raven > flippinh my wrecks and cans makes you a cocks****r
Eon Raptor > that was my salvaging mission. I was giving the BM by my agent
Raven > popping my BS makes you a **********
Raven > what? bullshit
Eon Raptor > I thought it was odd too.
Raven > yeah, odd my ass
Eon Raptor > its not my fault CCP added new mission types
Raven > mate stop talking ****
Eon Raptor > but I was surprised when I started getting shot at
Raven > I don't knw how you scanned down my mission,
Raven > but you did
Eon Raptor > I told you already, my agent gave me that book mark
Raven > thought that was not possible anymore
Raven > ok I'll play - what agent?
Eon Raptor > *random agent from station i'm at*
Eon Raptor > she said there were wrecks spread around a room that needed to be redistributed
Raven > you are hilarious
Eon Raptor > hey, I don't write the missions. I just run them
Raven > dude, you asked for a ransom, sorry for not believiing your crap
Eon Raptor > That's cause you fired on me, causing me to fail my mission
Raven > you're getting boring, just **** off
Pilot in local > NOW NOW CHILDREN PLAY NICLY :)
Eon Raptor > ahhhh, mommy. But she hit me first.
Pilot in local > lols
Rupture > just checked you're corp, Ninja hits one of your specialities...
Eon Raptor > WHAT!!!! They didn't tell me that. Those liers. They said they are a missioning corp.
Raven > lol, you really are a funny man
Eon Raptor > fyi, you're not gettign much benefit out of that second shield boost amp. Also, drop the armor rep for another BCU and upgrade to an x-large booster
Eon Raptor > if you're worried about permi running your tank, you'll need CC rigs
Rupture > ha, it was fine for running missions, wasn't expecting PvP
Eon Raptor > dont do an omni fit for missions, change your hardeners for rat specific.
Eon Raptor > "fine" which is why you had a friend
Eon Raptor > who...btw....should be rigging his rupture if he's using t2 everythign else
Eon Raptor > and how you gonna get into AC range with a web and scram if you dont have a wmd?
Raven > worked on you
Eon Raptor > really
Eon Raptor > thats why you both lost ships
Eon Raptor > and I lost.....oh....nothing
Eon Raptor > how'd that work again?
Raven > you tell me
Eon Raptor > [17:47:34] Eon Raptor > thats why you both lost ships
Eon Raptor > ^told you
Raven > like I say, wasn't expecting PvP
Eon Raptor > your rupture buddy must have. you dont fit a scram on a PvE fit
Eon Raptor > so maybe he should have told you he was expectivng PvP you should be too
Eon Raptor > ok, forget being pissed for a sec. take the tips I gave you seriously, they will actually help you make more
Eon Raptor > you'll make that 120 back in a few missions
Raven > not with you around
Eon Raptor > *sigh*
Eon Raptor > i'll make it easier
Eon Raptor > 1) don't shoot at ninjas
Eon Raptor > 2) if you do shoot at ninjas, prepare to lose ship
Raven > Don't worry I'll be ready next time
Another pilot in local > 3) Have pvp ship ready .. dock up and get into pvp ship .. return to mission and shoot ninja
Eon Raptor > 4) hope ninja didn't already plan for that
Another pilot in local > 5) have corp mates ready to give ninja a bad day
Eon Raptor > sure, that'd be fun
Raven > you're running out of single digits, does this go on much longer?
Raven > don't believe it you were still sitting in the mission area? waiting? what is your problem?
Eon Raptor > I still had my mission to complete
Raven > who for, don't give me the agent crap agan?
Eon Raptor > listen, if you can't trust a P I R A T E who can you trust
Raven > deep

Happened a lil while ago :)
Maxx is my alt BTW

[ 2008.07.28 15:04:05 ] Victim > please
[ 2008.07.28 15:04:12 ] Victim > dont kil me
[ 2008.07.28 15:04:13 ] Maxx Avenkarde > Yarr lower weapons and prepare to be boarded
[ 2008.07.28 15:04:29 ] Maxx Avenkarde > we demand rum and booty
[ 2008.07.28 15:05:36 ] Maxx Avenkarde > whats it worth to you not to die??
[ 2008.07.28 15:05:59 ] Victim > exusme?
[ 2008.07.28 15:06:12 ] Maxx Avenkarde > whats it worth to you not to die...
[ 2008.07.28 15:06:17 ] Maxx Avenkarde > simple question
[ 2008.07.28 15:06:37 ] Victim > yeah, it maybe siple
[ 2008.07.28 15:07:02 ] Victim > wait a second, i must translate it to my language
[ 2008.07.28 15:07:11 ] Maxx Avenkarde > ransom
[ 2008.07.28 15:07:14 ] Maxx Avenkarde > we want isk
[ 2008.07.28 15:08:01 ] Victim > im afrade im empty ^(
[ 2008.07.28 15:08:16 ] Maxx Avenkarde > your broke??
[ 2008.07.28 15:08:22 ] Maxx Avenkarde > ok well fill this can then
[ 2008.07.28 15:08:29 ] Maxx Avenkarde > we'll take that
[ 2008.07.28 15:08:56 ] Victim> u take what&
[ 2008.07.28 15:09:03 ] Maxx Avenkarde > your jaspet
[ 2008.07.28 15:09:07 ] Victim > oh
[ 2008.07.28 15:09:09 ] Victim > ok
[ 2008.07.28 15:13:48 ] Maxx Avenkarde > keep mining
[ 2008.07.28 15:14:28 ] Maxx Avenkarde > only jaspet
[ 2008.07.28 15:14:36 ] Maxx Avenkarde > i see veldsper you see lead
[ 2008.07.28 15:14:46 ] Victim > no'
[ 2008.07.28 15:14:54 ] Victim > its jaspet
[ 2008.07.28 15:15:01 ] Victim > u need veldspar&
[ 2008.07.28 15:15:12 ] Maxx Avenkarde > no we want jaspet
[ 2008.07.28 15:15:40 ] Victim > i mine jaspet

Didn't make much, made him fill one can, but as he was only a few days old at the time I didn't think I would make much isk from a ransom.

Was in Hek today, just minding my own business, killing rats in the belts, hoping to find a can to flip, when:

Im just finishing off the last rat in the belt, and a Probe warps in, with aggression.

I lock, scram/web, sick my drones on him, and neut his cap into oblivion. His ship promptly melted.

Turns out he had looted one of the wrecks from another belt that I had visited.

Hu-Rah!

Funnest chat log ever!

So there i was , new guy asked how to play EVE like a pro, i told him there was HP in the secure container.

A real pirate always Honors ransoms, your certainly a better person than i am.

Good thing I'm not a pirate though.

BEST. RANSOM. EVER.