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Out of Pod Experience

 
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How to identify bad things and keep your mind off of the floor at all times
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Alex Grison
Grison Universal
#1 - 2013-07-10 09:58:33 UTC
Sometimes all you need is a little bit of a soul scraping to keep your mind off of the ground at all times and inside of the vehicle to reduce the chances of secondary complications.

Do not take Grisonol® if you have a history of


  • Rational Thinking


Grisonol® Is to be taken 3 times a day with food, eight times daily, sixteen times per day every 2 or 3 hours as needed.

If you Experience any of the following side effects


  • Rational Thinking


Double your dose of Grisonol®

Next time a giant insect wants you to work for him you should accept the offer of employment, and then spit plant pollen on his antenna as a sign of respect and well being.

You will then be required to go to the Hall of Disorder and register with King Dysfunction. He will then issue you an ID and take your soul imprint. Your soul imprint will be kept on file for a standard contract period of 30,000 years After which it will be consumed by a crowbot. And you will be recollected for a soul imprint renewal.

Please note that this is not a full set of instructions and it not intended to replace formal classroom training.

yes
Echo Echoplex
#2 - 2013-07-10 11:54:42 UTC
Quote:
Next time a giant insect wants you to work for him you should accept the offer of employment, and then spit plant pollen on his antenna as a sign of respect and well being.


That's all well and good but what about the small ones? It's summer. I have ants. Millions of them, in every room, on every counter and tabletop. I can't put down a spoon without hoards of them frantically descending on it like some massive epic CGI battlescene shot by David Lean from a helicopter. I left them a Unisom. What else can I do?

Untutored courage is useless in the face of educated bullets. Gen. George S. Patton
Slade Trillgon
Brutor Force Federated
#3 - 2013-07-10 13:29:18 UTC
Echo Echoplex wrote:
Quote:
Next time a giant insect wants you to work for him you should accept the offer of employment, and then spit plant pollen on his antenna as a sign of respect and well being.


That's all well and good but what about the small ones? It's summer. I have ants. Millions of them, in every room, on every counter and tabletop. I can't put down a spoon without hoards of them frantically descending on it like some massive epic CGI battlescene shot by David Lean from a helicopter. I left them a Unisom. What else can I do?


In case this is a serious question the following worked for me when sugar ants were the problem in my efficiency when I live in South Florida.

Try to identify a trail and follow it to its source and spray it with bleach. Also, spray a nice amount of bleach around every window frame and door way.
Eurydia Vespasian
Storm Hunters
#4 - 2013-07-10 18:47:11 UTC
Slade Trillgon wrote:
Echo Echoplex wrote:
Quote:
Next time a giant insect wants you to work for him you should accept the offer of employment, and then spit plant pollen on his antenna as a sign of respect and well being.


That's all well and good but what about the small ones? It's summer. I have ants. Millions of them, in every room, on every counter and tabletop. I can't put down a spoon without hoards of them frantically descending on it like some massive epic CGI battlescene shot by David Lean from a helicopter. I left them a Unisom. What else can I do?


In case this is a serious question the following worked for me when sugar ants were the problem in my efficiency when I live in South Florida.

Try to identify a trail and follow it to its source and spray it with bleach. Also, spray a nice amount of bleach around every window frame and door way.


the old "scorched earth" strategy for dealing with invaders. a classic.
Krixtal Icefluxor
INLAND EMPIRE Galactic
#5 - 2013-07-10 19:36:08 UTC  |  Edited by: Krixtal Icefluxor
Echo Echoplex wrote:
like some massive epic CGI battlescene shot by David Lean from a helicopter.



Sigh. If only he could have done this.

I've always wondered what Andy Warhol would have done with the Internet and social media.


edit: "In the future, everyone will be famous for 15 seconds".

"He has mounted his hind-legs, and blown crass vapidities through the bowel of his neck."  - Ambrose Bierce on Oscar Wilde's Lecture in San Francisco 1882
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
#6 - 2013-07-10 19:38:57 UTC
Krixtal Icefluxor wrote:
I've always wondered what Andy Warhol would have done with the Internet and social media.


I've always wondered what Alex Grison would have done with 100 boxes of Sudafed and a bunson burner in a seedy motel bathtub.

Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings?
Alex Grison
Grison Universal
#7 - 2013-07-10 22:59:29 UTC
Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:
Krixtal Icefluxor wrote:
I've always wondered what Andy Warhol would have done with the Internet and social media.


I've always wondered what Alex Grison would have done with 100 boxes of Sudafed and a bunson burner in a seedy motel bathtub.


Methamgrisamine

yes