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Crime & Punishment

 
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[FOR HIRE] If you're good at something, don't do it for free.

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Kristoffon Ellecon
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#1 - 2013-04-11 16:52:45 UTC  |  Edited by: Kristoffon Ellecon
Inspired by our friends Kane and Monk I decided to try my hand at high sec warfare and started picking random corps to wardec and, what do you know, i'm quite good at it.

I've had a 100% success rate in my war decs so far, whereby a successful wardec is defined as one where the enemy either: never undocks, or their corp loses a third of their membership overnight, or they feed my killboard. I have caused corps to be kicked out of alliances, dudes to be kicked out of corps, not to mention untold destruction and damage. As of 22/04, 9B Isk worth of destruction performed by a single person in just over a month. I love nothing more than hunting down targets and will show the same persistance towards destroying a T3 cruiser or a shitfit mission running destroyer for, to their owners, they are as important and so is my satisfaction in killing them.

So I'm therefore offering my services to anyone needing a hand.

Things I'll do

Wardec high-sec corps
Ally into existing wars
Use your killrights
Stalk and hunt down your enemies
Study their movements
Lurk and give them a sense of security
Probe down every single ship in a system with 200 mission runners to find the target
Wait for them at the next gate
KILL THEM

Things I won't do

Hunt null/wh targets
Take down POS
Suicide attacks

I appreciate targets that'll try to fight back but keep in mind I'm strictly a solo pilot so pitting me against people that only undock in 10 man gangs with logi probably won't result in many kills.

10% discount if the target's name has anything to do with ponies.

Some words of encouragement (careful: those words would be censored by the forum filter) from a gentleman upon being offered our services that were delivered strictly on time.

More words from another satisfied target:
Quote:
I was forwarded the mail you nedt my "alliance" CEO's.

Well done.

I applaud your style, very classy. I know this might sound less than sincere, but I assure you EvE is lacking more people like you. I agree with your comments, and applaud your war declaration. I was in [REDACTED] yesterday, we had a few people on and I was ****** trying to get people to come after you. As you know, to no avail. Anyway just wanted to say hi, and let you know you are doing good work.


Infomercial style comparison where I show how good I am

Mining Corporation 1 (name available to be supplied in private) has had 6 finished wars.

  1. Wardeccer 1: 0 ISK killed
  2. Wardeccer 2: 64M ISK killed
  3. Wardeccer 3: 0 ISK killed
  4. Wardeccer 4: 0 ISK killed
  5. Wardeccer 5: 0 ISK killed
  6. Kris' Karebear Killing Korp: 746M ISK killed


MURDERBOARD LINK


List of positive social interactions:

  • HorusAha Cann placed 1.000.000.000 ISK in bounty on your head.
  • w barringer placed 10.000.000 ISK in bounty on your head.
  • Andrea Cavin-Guang placed 1.000.000 ISK in bounty on your head.
  • Draconis Demulus placed 11.000.000 ISK in bounty on your head.


Thank you
Kristopher Rocancourt
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#2 - 2013-04-11 17:07:42 UTC  |  Edited by: Kristopher Rocancourt
make em red n shootem dead

http://killalliance.co.uk/tears/tears-holeysheet/

StoneCold
Decadence.
RAZOR Alliance
#3 - 2013-04-11 17:12:58 UTC
As long as he gets the job done it doenst matter how he finances his hardware.

Good luck, gentleman.

My true stories
Kristopher Rocancourt
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#4 - 2013-04-11 17:20:07 UTC
StoneCold wrote:
As long as he gets the job done it doenst matter how he finances his hardware.

Good luck, gentleman.

agreed. as long as client pays well, who cares :)
best of luck in your endeavour.

http://killalliance.co.uk/tears/tears-holeysheet/

Bklyn 1
MUSE Buy-n-Large
#5 - 2013-04-11 17:35:43 UTC
Kristoffon Ellecon wrote:

Things I won't do

Hunt low/null/wh targets



I applaud your efforts and all, but what's with war dec corps and the sheer terror of having to go into low?
Kristoffon Ellecon
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#6 - 2013-04-11 17:40:48 UTC
Bklyn 1 wrote:
Kristoffon Ellecon wrote:

Things I won't do

Hunt low/null/wh targets



I applaud your efforts and all, but what's with war dec corps and the sheer terror of having to go into low?


I like to fly solo and in my experience that doesn't go so well in low sec because you'll only find either low value targets (frigs, destroyers), or blobs.
Solomar Espersei
Quality Assurance
#7 - 2013-04-11 18:08:43 UTC
Bklyn 1 wrote:
I applaud your efforts and all, but what's with war dec corps and the sheer terror of having to go into low?

When there are literally thousands of existing targets flying around in High Sec, why would we run away from them. Look, getting popped in Null, Low or WH space isn't something we fear or even care about. Our clients hire Mercs to annihilate the enemy, not to waste time chasing ghosts in the backwaters of LOLsec.

Best of luck Kristoffon.

Quality Assurance Recruiting intrepid explorers and BlOps/Cov Ops combat enthusiasts
Zeus Maximo
Mentally Assured Destruction
#8 - 2013-04-11 21:23:18 UTC
Good Luck Kris

"It is not possible either to trick or escape the mind of Zeus."

U-MAD Membership Recruitment

PoH Corporation Recruitment
Xanthe Kado
Doomheim
#9 - 2013-04-12 04:58:04 UTC
Bklyn 1 wrote:
I applaud your efforts and all, but what's with war dec corps and the sheer terror of having to go into low?


Risk adversity, plain and simple. Hisec war deccers like one-sided PvP and bloated killboard stats.

This and other breaking news at 11.
Jonah Gravenstein
Machiavellian Space Bastards
#10 - 2013-04-12 06:09:31 UTC
Always nice to see kills like that Hurricane, that fit was abysmal and deserved to die.

In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.

New Player FAQ

Feyd's Survival Pack
culo duro
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
#11 - 2013-04-12 06:19:57 UTC
Bklyn 1 wrote:
Kristoffon Ellecon wrote:

Things I won't do

Hunt low/null/wh targets



I applaud your efforts and all, but what's with war dec corps and the sheer terror of having to go into low?


I wanna be able to come in from the gate i came from, without having to farm standing.

I've starting blogging http://www.epvpc.blogspot.com 
Kristoffon Ellecon
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#12 - 2013-04-15 17:04:23 UTC
BUMP - wardecs running out, need targets
Karl Hobb
Imperial Margarine
#13 - 2013-04-15 17:26:09 UTC
Jonah Gravenstein wrote:
Always nice to see kills like that Hurricane, that fit was abysmal and deserved to die.

Jesus, you ain't kidding. Thank you, Kris, for your service to EVE.

A professional astro-bastard was not available so they sent me.
Kristoffon Ellecon
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#14 - 2013-04-22 14:37:03 UTC
I'm having to wardec random innocent carebear corps to get targets.

So it is YOUR DUTY to protect the innocent carebears and hire me to go after the guilty ones.

BUMP.
Ricardo Veneroso
Perkone
Caldari State
#15 - 2013-04-22 22:15:40 UTC
Not 100% success rate any more :)
Danalee
A Blessed Bean
Pandemic Horde
#16 - 2013-04-22 22:16:27 UTC
Nice one, I applaud your efforts.

Perfect war reports isn't true anymore due to you getting a bit to over eager but still....
It would be nice to kill another of your Machariels, so if you'd be so kind to oblige :)

Meanwhile, fly safe, mkay?

D.

Proud member of the Somalian Coast Guard Authority

Member and Juror of the Court of Crime and Punishment
penifSMASH
ElitistOps
Deepwater Hooligans
#17 - 2013-04-22 23:45:27 UTC
Are you as bad as you were in waffles/TEST or have you actually improved since leaving?
Kristoffon Ellecon
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#18 - 2013-04-23 00:03:16 UTC
Hey Penif what's up?

Well I measure how good I am at fun / hour so I'd say I'm much, much better thanks.
StoneCold
Decadence.
RAZOR Alliance
#19 - 2013-04-23 07:23:10 UTC
Only hearing good things about Kristoffon`s service.
That´s why he should be on the top of that list.

My true stories
CCP Eterne
C C P
C C P Alliance
#20 - 2013-04-23 13:15:07 UTC
Deleted a kill mail link from this thread.

EVE Online/DUST 514 Community Representative ※ EVE Illuminati ※ Fiction Adept

@CCP_Eterne ※ @EVE_LiveEvents
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