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So I was in this bar..

Author
Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#1 - 2015-11-08 00:40:27 UTC  |  Edited by: Omega Jovakko
So here I was, minding my own business, when this guy walks up to me and starts commenting on something that happened so long ago not even my grandparents were alive. Something related to my people (The sometimes beautiful Caldari) losing their home planet (you can see where I'm going with this). So I kindly remind him this is a public establishment and the event he's referring to is of no importance to me, as the whole deal was settled and there is now a long standing peace (or as far as I'm aware). He then grown belligerent, I turn to confront him, Lo and behold, he's a Gallentean pilot, Fun.

So long story short we get into a heated debate about whether or not he's an idiot, I'm fairly confident that my IQ is a bit higher than his, but he is so dead set on proving me right that he begins to outright threaten me in front of all the patrons. Now, please understand, i'm not proud of my Corporate-run people, but i'm born into it so whatever. I try to calm him down only to realize i'm in a room full of those who do not like me, nor my uniform. I offer a drink to him, which is apparently an insult as he spits in my face, he shoves me against the bar. I, unfortunately, lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonads while I make a break for the exit. My question is this, if I somehow came upon information about a possible smuggling of weapons he may or may not have on his ship, would it be a valid notification? or would it be suspicious since he and I had a small scuffle?

If anyone knows, I would appreciate a response

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

Foley Aberas Jones
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#2 - 2015-11-08 01:18:51 UTC
Omega Jovakko wrote:
lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonadse



Who the **** kicks another man in the balls....?
Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#3 - 2015-11-08 01:19:41 UTC
I have....
Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#4 - 2015-11-08 01:20:01 UTC  |  Edited by: Omega Jovakko
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonadse



Who the **** kicks another man in the balls....?



I was very drunk, I'm sure I mentioned I was drinking.

Plus he started it, I was without my sidearm and it was the easiest thing to do.

Also, Deitra, Thank you.

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

Foley Aberas Jones
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#5 - 2015-11-08 01:25:04 UTC
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonadse



Who the **** kicks another man in the balls....?



I was very drunk, I'm sure I mentioned I was drinking.

Plus he started it, I was without my sidearm and it was the easiest thing to do.

Also, Deitra, Thank you.

i mean Male vs Male combat...
But Dude

Broc ode #567

"A man shall never kick another man in the balls in a fight, either punch the face or chest or kick the shin or get the **** out"

As a Enforcer of the Bro code i officially apply one strike to your Bro card, if you achieve 2 more i will have to confiscate your Official Bro card
Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#6 - 2015-11-08 01:26:19 UTC  |  Edited by: Omega Jovakko
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonadse



Who the **** kicks another man in the balls....?



I was very drunk, I'm sure I mentioned I was drinking.

Plus he started it, I was without my sidearm and it was the easiest thing to do.

Also, Deitra, Thank you.

i mean Male vs Male combat...
But Dude

Broc ode #567

"A man shall never kick another man in the balls in a fight, either punch the face or chest or kick the shin or get the **** out"

As a Enforcer of the Bro code i officially apply one strike to your Bro card, if you achieve 2 more i will have to confiscate your Official Bro card



When was I given a "Bro-Card?" And also, why are you enforcing bro code when we're surrounded by a black nothingness? I feel like this is a specified punishment for myself only.

Also you're focusing too much on the fact I assaulted his baby-making cannon. can we please move on?

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

Ibrahim Tash-Murkon
Itsukame-Zainou Hyperspatial Inquiries Ltd.
Arataka Research Consortium
#7 - 2015-11-08 03:03:30 UTC
I enjoyed the beginning of the story. Then after getting beyond the title it soured for me.

"I give you the destiny of Faith, and you will bring its message to every planet of every star in the heavens: Go forth, conquer in my Name, and reclaim that which I have given." - Book of Reclaiming 22:13

Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#8 - 2015-11-08 03:39:57 UTC
Ibrahim Tash-Murkon wrote:
I enjoyed the beginning of the story. Then after getting beyond the title it soured for me.


Now you understand how I felt. I was enjoying my evening, only to have it ruined.

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

Erica Dusette
Division 13
#9 - 2015-11-08 08:45:12 UTC
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonadse



Who the **** kicks another man in the balls....?



I was very drunk, I'm sure I mentioned I was drinking.

Plus he started it, I was without my sidearm and it was the easiest thing to do.

Also, Deitra, Thank you.

i mean Male vs Male combat...
But Dude

Broc ode #567

"A man shall never kick another man in the balls in a fight, either punch the face or chest or kick the shin or get the **** out"

As a Enforcer of the Bro code i officially apply one strike to your Bro card, if you achieve 2 more i will have to confiscate your Official Bro card

Fascinating, sir.

I'm now curious what this code says about eye-gouging and biting.

Jack Miton > you be nice or you're sleeping on the couch again!

Part-Time Wormhole Pirate Full-Time Supermodel

worмнole dιary + cнaracтer вιoѕвσss

Utari Onzo
Escalated.
OnlyFleets.
#10 - 2015-11-08 08:58:47 UTC
Clean record on my bro card here.

Anyways, if this man is indeed illegally smuggling weapons, you should report him.

"Face the enemy as a solid wall For faith is your armor And through it, the enemy will find no breach Wrap your arms around the enemy For faith is your fire And with it, burn away his evil"

Trii Seo
Goonswarm Federation
#11 - 2015-11-08 11:07:42 UTC
Erica Dusette wrote:
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Foley Aberas Jones wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonadse



Who the **** kicks another man in the balls....?



I was very drunk, I'm sure I mentioned I was drinking.

Plus he started it, I was without my sidearm and it was the easiest thing to do.

Also, Deitra, Thank you.

i mean Male vs Male combat...
But Dude

Broc ode #567

"A man shall never kick another man in the balls in a fight, either punch the face or chest or kick the shin or get the **** out"

As a Enforcer of the Bro code i officially apply one strike to your Bro card, if you achieve 2 more i will have to confiscate your Official Bro card

Fascinating, sir.

I'm now curious what this code says about eye-gouging and biting.


Last I recall, much like a swift called shot to the nuts - biting is mostly reserved for women. Eye-gouging, as far as I remember, free game.

Proud pilot of the Imperium

Arek'Jaalan: Heliograph

Lord Kailethre
Tengoo Uninstallation Service
#12 - 2015-11-08 15:52:20 UTC
Utari Onzo wrote:
Clean record on my bro card here.

Anyways, if this man is indeed illegally smuggling weapons, you should report him.


Or steal his supply and then his trade route.
I mean, reporting him is good and dandy also.
Ria Nieyli
Nieyli Enterprises
When Fleets Collide
#13 - 2015-11-08 18:14:54 UTC
Omega Jovakko wrote:
I'm fairly confident that my IQ is a bit higher than his


Why do people keep saying things like this is beyond me.
Anyanka Funk
Doomheim
#14 - 2015-11-08 18:34:15 UTC
Ria Nieyli wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
I'm fairly confident that my IQ is a bit higher than his


Why do people keep saying things like this is beyond me.

I don't know either, Ria. But by the look of his public loss record, I'm going to have to disagree with him.
Diana Kim
State Protectorate
Caldari State
#15 - 2015-11-08 18:47:36 UTC
Omega Jovakko wrote:
So here I was, minding my own business, when this guy walks up to me and starts commenting on something that happened so long ago not even my grandparents were alive. Something related to my people (The sometimes beautiful Caldari) losing their home planet (you can see where I'm going with this). So I kindly remind him this is a public establishment and the event he's referring to is of no importance to me, as the whole deal was settled and there is now a long standing peace (or as far as I'm aware). He then grown belligerent, I turn to confront him, Lo and behold, he's a Gallentean pilot, Fun.

So long story short we get into a heated debate about whether or not he's an idiot, I'm fairly confident that my IQ is a bit higher than his, but he is so dead set on proving me right that he begins to outright threaten me in front of all the patrons. Now, please understand, i'm not proud of my Corporate-run people, but i'm born into it so whatever. I try to calm him down only to realize i'm in a room full of those who do not like me, nor my uniform. I offer a drink to him, which is apparently an insult as he spits in my face, he shoves me against the bar. I, unfortunately, lose my temper and deliver a swift kick to the gonads while I make a break for the exit. My question is this, if I somehow came upon information about a possible smuggling of weapons he may or may not have on his ship, would it be a valid notification? or would it be suspicious since he and I had a small scuffle?

If anyone knows, I would appreciate a response

Well.
Gallente.
I am not surprised. Consider yourself lucky he didn't start beating you out of nothing.

Pity you've left him alive though.
I'd recommend you facing him instead of some "smuggling weapons" in front of his ship and teach that gallentean swine some respect in the form of your sole imprints on his ugly hedonist muzzle.

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.

Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#16 - 2015-11-08 20:20:23 UTC
Well he did leave "his sole imprints" somewhere... Right before he ran from the big scary Gallante guy...
Diana Kim
State Protectorate
Caldari State
#17 - 2015-11-08 21:48:35 UTC
Probably he needs to leave them on gallentean crotch too.
You know. Because just knee is never enough.

Right, Mr. Foley?

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.

Foley Aberas Jones
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#18 - 2015-11-08 22:18:16 UTC
Diana Kim wrote:
Probably he needs to leave them on gallentean crotch too.
You know. Because just knee is never enough.

Right, Mr. Foley?


The Codex Brostartes does not support this action.......
Trii Seo
Goonswarm Federation
#19 - 2015-11-08 22:19:50 UTC  |  Edited by: Trii Seo
Diana Kim wrote:


Well.
Gallente.
I am not surprised. Consider yourself lucky he didn't start beating you out of nothing.

Pity you've left him alive though.
I'd recommend you facing him instead of some "smuggling weapons" in front of his ship and teach that gallentean swine some respect in the form of your sole imprints on his ugly hedonist muzzle.


D'aww, would you look at that absolutely adorable derail attempt.

So, sides from the ballbusting debacle:

If you bust him for smuggling because you had a bad run-in you're smart. Since he knows more or less who you are - if he can tie two facts together you can expect him to remember that.

I'd say at this point? Rob his stash, shoot him with it for ultimate irony and sell for profit.

Proud pilot of the Imperium

Arek'Jaalan: Heliograph

Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#20 - 2015-11-09 00:29:05 UTC
I've basically come to terms with the fact that this whole situation was a bit odd, I appreciate the recommendations and comments on my choice of defense, I went ahead and reported him. While I don't know really what happened after that, I do know that this region is down 1 Galletean. I would much rather not commit acts of murder while I'm still young-ish.

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

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