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I have finally found the strength to admit it!

First post
Author
Akelorian
School of Applied Knowledge
Caldari State
#1 - 2015-03-22 22:37:19 UTC
I was 12 years old when I realized that I’m not really a guyat heart, but rather a 19 foot, 10.5 inch long Gatling gun strapped onto a 24,959 pound air frame. All my life has been a lie but I’m setting that right today. I was designed to kill Soviet tanks. From now on, call me “Warthog.” That’s my real name. I’m having plastic surgeons attach a GAU-8 Avenger 30 millimeter rotary cannon, 1,200 pounds of titanium armor, and two General Electric TF34-GE-100 turbofan engines to my body. Sgt. Major Fairchild said I’m f***ing stupid and I can’t be a jet, but I’m beautiful and I am a goddamn jet. If the Army won’t pay for me to get the surgery, I’m just going to bring in Code Pink and point out that that Manning loser is getting hormones and he’s in prison so why shouldn't a perfectly well-adjusted and honorable citizen have the right to be who they truly are, a metal killing machine? I am so sick and tired of being oppressed. Now we A-10’s are on the government chopping block. It’s sickening to see all the white cisgender nazi shitlords literally raping my people with their actions. It’s my right to spray 2,100 to 4,200 depleted uranium rounds per minute at both soft and hard targets and if you don’t support me and my transformation then you’re an aerialphobe and need to check your weapon platform privilege.

"BRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP"

*end rant*
HiltoftheDragons
Grievance3
#2 - 2015-03-22 22:46:45 UTC
*turns the light back off*

Destiny always seems decades away, but suddenly it's not decades away; it's right now. But maybe destiny is always right now, right here, right this very instant, maybe.

SeenButNotHeard
Perkone
Caldari State
#3 - 2015-03-22 22:49:20 UTC
I am not entirely sure what prompted that. On the plus side, you made me want to be a Warthog. So that's cool.
Hal Morsh
Doomheim
#4 - 2015-03-22 22:54:56 UTC
High doses of... whatever that is... Should be encouraged on these forums.

Oh, I perfectly understand, Hal Morsh — a mission like this requires courage, skill, and heroism… qualities you are clearly lacking. Have you forgotten you're one of the bloody immortals!?

Mr Epeen
It's All About Me
#5 - 2015-03-22 22:56:27 UTC  |  Edited by: Mr Epeen
You know you don't need to get surgery to stick your hot steel up some Russian's...uh...never mind.

Mr Epeen Cool
Akelorian
School of Applied Knowledge
Caldari State
#6 - 2015-03-22 23:11:38 UTC
Mr Epeen wrote:
You know you don't need to get surgery to stick your hot steel up some Russian's...uh...never mind.

Mr Epeen Cool


lol
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
#7 - 2015-03-22 23:30:05 UTC
I too am upset about the A-10 being on the chopping block, but it still doesn't explain what the **** I just read.





Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings?

Chewytowel Haklar
Brutor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#8 - 2015-03-22 23:33:17 UTC
You finally came out of the hangar, congrats!
Khergit Deserters
Crom's Angels
#9 - 2015-03-22 23:39:05 UTC
How could the U.S military and Congress be so dumb as to kill off the A-10 Warthog? The flying Gatling gun, with bombs and missiles is one of the last things we have to be proud of. It's like a Frazetta painting. Or, another Frazetta painting.
Logan Revelore
Symbiotic Systems
#10 - 2015-03-23 00:00:53 UTC
This is patient #8. He's been like this since we retrieved him from wormhole PJ-78k 20 years ago. He hasn't responded to treatment so far.

Electroshock is our last resort.

Pok Nibin
Doomheim
#11 - 2015-03-23 01:01:38 UTC  |  Edited by: Pok Nibin
In before the lock! In before the lock!

(This OP is a failed attempt at a witty tirade over the unfairness of the American government
to properly kiss its white boyz @$$3$. They really are going over some mental cliff these days.)

The right to free speech doesn't automatically carry with it the right to be taken seriously.

Serene Repose
#12 - 2015-03-23 01:04:53 UTC
I dated a wart hog once. He used to knock beers over with those tusks. It was a relationship doomed from the start. Sad

We must accommodate the idiocracy.

Vyl Vit
#13 - 2015-03-23 01:05:51 UTC  |  Edited by: Vyl Vit
I knew some wart hog pilots back in the day....when that plane was "new". They were nuts; as nuts as this OP.

Paradise is like where you are right now, only much, much better.

Rowells
Blackwater USA Inc.
Pandemic Horde
#14 - 2015-03-23 01:12:14 UTC
I'm surprised he/she/it hasn't mentioned it's preferred pronoun yet

Chainsaw Plankton
FaDoyToy
#15 - 2015-03-23 01:15:00 UTC
I never properly understood gender identities until this post, so now I think I'm a T-rex!

the world makes so much more sense! RAWR!

@ChainsawPlankto on twitter

The Golden Serpent
A Drunken Squirrels' Conspiracy for Revenge
#16 - 2015-03-23 02:22:45 UTC
i am for this

-:¦:-•:'":•.-:¦:-•* K H A N I D •-:¦:-•:''''*:•-:¦:-

Jenshae Chiroptera
#17 - 2015-03-23 03:18:05 UTC
Quote:
Cruel and unusual: Army will pay for Bradley Manning's hormone treatments in prison, but s/he can't grow her hair out
Basically the OP is saying that the army shouldn't give someone hormones and if they do then where do we draw the line?

By the same token, when someone is defective, we could deny them insulin. Sure in one case one might die and the other does not but they will both be miserable and that is what criminals deserve, right?

CCP - Building ant hills and magnifying glasses for fat kids

Not even once

EVE is becoming shallow and puerile; it will satisfy neither the veteran nor the "WoW" type crowd in the transition.

Seven Koskanaiken
Shadow Legions.
#18 - 2015-03-23 03:24:09 UTC
Yazzinra
Scorpion Ventures
#19 - 2015-03-23 03:47:57 UTC
Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:
I too am upset about the A-10 being on the chopping block, but it still doesn't explain what the **** I just read.







Not empty quoting.
Yourmoney Mywallet
Doomheim
#20 - 2015-03-23 04:26:36 UTC
Akelorian wrote:
"BRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP"

"BRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP"
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