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If you could evil CCP CEO for a year, what would you do?

First post
Author
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DrSmegma
Smegma United
#41 - 2014-05-25 14:43:07 UTC  |  Edited by: DrSmegma
I would sit in my office and play with myself all day.

I mean MineSweeper. Against myself. Against the clock.

Eve too complicated? Try Astrum Regatta.
Alexei Stryker
Council of Stellar Erections
#42 - 2014-05-25 14:49:25 UTC
Introduce the concept of "Bind on pickup" to Eve. Make every T3, Officer and faction stuff BoP. Twisted
Bohneik Itohn
10.K
#43 - 2014-05-25 14:54:17 UTC  |  Edited by: Bohneik Itohn
Compile a list of the 1000 most valuable POS's in the game and have the fellas set it so that 3 of them are selected at random, destroyed, their contents jet-canned and their ships thrown out into space every day.

With this I become de-facto #1 "Content Creator".

Wait, CCP kills kittens now too?!  - Freyya

Are you a forum alt? Have you ever wondered why your experience on the forums is always so frustrating and unrewarding? This may help.
Thead Enco
HR..
#44 - 2014-05-25 14:56:50 UTC
Put an alt in the holding corp, "Right click, Disband"
Ned Thomas
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#45 - 2014-05-25 15:02:15 UTC
Introduce random trick asteroids that trigger a mass explosion while being mined. The explosion destroys every undocked ship in system, anyone that loses a ship gains a killright on the unlucky miner.
Bohneik Itohn
10.K
#46 - 2014-05-25 15:04:02 UTC
Ned Thomas wrote:
Introduce random trick asteroids that trigger a mass explosion while being mined. The explosion destroys every undocked ship in system, anyone that loses a ship gains a killright on the unlucky miner.



Nova-roid wins again.

Wait, CCP kills kittens now too?!  - Freyya

Are you a forum alt? Have you ever wondered why your experience on the forums is always so frustrating and unrewarding? This may help.
Eleanor Wish
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
#47 - 2014-05-25 15:08:22 UTC
Start a kickstarter for WiS and spend all the money on beer and hookers.
DrSmegma
Smegma United
#48 - 2014-05-25 15:10:08 UTC  |  Edited by: DrSmegma
Oh yeah. I'd introduce space dragons. They would attack with fire, ultra sound or.. some damaging warp stuff. They'd be so big that they could eclipse the sun at times, warp faster than ships, and they'd lay eggs on planets. Then more dragons would hatch and claim nearby systems. Like in Master of Orion 2.

I honestly have no idea why people claim this doesn't belong to Eve. It would fit perfectly imo.

EDIT: You'd be warping and suddenly you'd stop. Your warp stuff doesn't work anymore because there's a dragon in the way. And then you're doomed.

Eve too complicated? Try Astrum Regatta.
Xavier Higdon
Science and Trade Institute
Caldari State
#49 - 2014-05-25 15:26:54 UTC
I must revise my actions. I'd ban DrSmegma and then I'd resign and appoint Dinsdale as my successor. After all, we're talking about being evil, and letting that boy post is not evil, it's outright sadistic.
Jade Blackwind
#50 - 2014-05-25 15:28:40 UTC  |  Edited by: Jade Blackwind
DrSmegma wrote:
Oh yeah. I'd introduce space dragons. They would attack with fire, ultra sound or.. some damaging warp stuff. They'd be so big that they could eclipse the sun at times, warp faster than ships, and they'd lay eggs on planets. Then more dragons would hatch and claim nearby systems. Like in Master of Orion 2.

I honestly have no idea why people claim this doesn't belong to Eve. It would fit perfectly imo.

EDIT: You'd be warping and suddenly you'd stop. Your warp stuff doesn't work anymore because there's a dragon in the way. And then you're doomed.


Also, space whales. That can warp cloaked. Nothing like hunting for a space whale in the rings of a gas giant on a Sunday evening, with twin suns of Hotrardik shining through the solar sail of a Tech 4 , three-deck, 60-gun Space Galleon.

Suddenly, a giant kraken decloaks...
Ralph King-Griffin
New Eden Tech Support
#51 - 2014-05-25 15:53:27 UTC
TOOLTIP ALL THE THINGS!

Murderers of Negotiable Motivations

=]|[=
darmwand
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
#52 - 2014-05-25 16:50:43 UTC
Repaint all ships in awful space-camo, then ask for money to get the original skins back.

"The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp."
Vimsy Vortis
Shoulda Checked Local
Break-A-Wish Foundation
#53 - 2014-05-25 17:00:21 UTC
Does CCP Greyscale still exist? If we're being evil we should promote that guy to the highest possible position.
Aiwha
School of Applied Knowledge
Caldari State
#54 - 2014-05-25 17:08:08 UTC
Pick a three digit number out of a hat, anybody with that numerical sequence in their current SP total gets banned.

Sanity is fun leaving the body.
Winchester Steele
#55 - 2014-05-25 17:40:36 UTC
Eleanor Wish wrote:
Start a kickstarter for WiS and spend all the money on beer and hookers.



Chris Roberts? Is that you?

...

Aspalis
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#56 - 2014-05-25 18:04:36 UTC
Mock the peasants that bought into a broken beta for two years on their potato station 3.

Marcus Gord: "Aspalis is an onion. Many layers, each one makes you cry."
Josef Djugashvilis
#57 - 2014-05-25 18:48:59 UTC  |  Edited by: Josef Djugashvilis
Make a policy decision - try to massively expand the player base, this can only be realistically achieved by making Eve 'dumber'

Or, try to keep a more stable, slow steadily growing player base by adding quality content without dumbing the game down.

I would prefer the latter, whilst at the same time really making an effort to keep those who try the game to stay, and help them realize that once they get past the 'what the eff is going on here' stage that Eve Online really is a great game - way of life.

Most of the growth for some time, seems to be Alts Online.

Evil part?

Do away with null altogether Smile

This is not a signature.
Belt Scout
Thread Lockaholics Anonymous
#58 - 2014-05-25 18:52:40 UTC  |  Edited by: Belt Scout
For one day, say April 1st, I would replace all in-game sounds with the sounds of the old school arcade games. Pacman for the miners, Space Invaders for the pvp'ers, etc.

Big smile

They say most of your brain shuts down on the EvE forums. All but the impatient side, and the sarcastic side. No wonder I'm still awake.

**This IS my main so STFU.
Cygnet Lythanea
World Welfare Works Association
#59 - 2014-05-25 19:53:44 UTC
Reimpliment Jukebox.
Fully implement WiS.
Re-balance mining.
Introduce Modular POS
Have CONCORD incursions into null, and Jovian incursions into everywhere.
Introduce LoS combat. (and friendly fire)
Allow players to build outposts in Empire/low sec systems with no station if they have the standings.
Tech 3 expanded
More faction ships
More ships period.
DrSmegma
Smegma United
#60 - 2014-05-25 20:54:04 UTC
DrSmegma opens the door of his office
"Which of you made the GUI?"
Huge moron turns around in his chair.
- That was me, sir!
"You're fired."
DrSmegma looks at the guy next to the dude who made the GUI.
"Can you make a better GUI?"
- No sir, I'm responsible for the furth-
"You're also fired. Gtfo."
DrSmegma looks at the next guy.
"What about you?"
- I-I'll try my best..

Eve too complicated? Try Astrum Regatta.