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Limerick Contest

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Knoppaz
distress signals
#161 - 2014-03-24 06:44:52 UTC  |  Edited by: Knoppaz
a pirate girl named naburi
fought always with utmost fury
she came to a blob
most ships just went 'pop'
she again left a scene of injury

Knoppaz / distressSIGNALS http://distresssignals.tumblr.com

a capsuleer's way to insanity
Don Aubaris
#162 - 2014-03-24 08:12:24 UTC
Inspired by the reprocessing dev blog :

There once was a dev called Ytterbium
who messed with the equilibrium
instead of all going to low
players exited with a bow
so now he's in charge of Eve's requiem.

Although I think Limericks are not for me. Can't get it flowing like I want.
Hir Miriel
Elves In Space
#163 - 2014-03-24 08:43:39 UTC
There once was a miner called me
An elven miner of insanity
Eleven years of,
Blasting rocks and dropping rats
Can teach what's what,
Deep Space is a Woman.
Cos we play EVE Online
Not Steve.

~ ~~ Thinking inside Schrodinger's sandbox. ~~ ~
Avon
#164 - 2014-03-24 10:43:40 UTC  |  Edited by: Avon
Oh gosh, this thread brings back memories of 2004

http://oldforums.eveonline.com/?a=topic&threadID=136405&page=1


Eve Online is a space game you see
But it means so much more to me
Over a decade I've played
But always changes are made
To keep me feeling like a freaking new-bie


Mining could be the thing for you
Or maybe a mission or two?
Whatever the way
You fill up your day
Someone will try to gank you.


Robbing and scamming are mean
But aren't always what they seem
You cry "Scum!"
But to some
A valuable lesson they've been.


Forum whining is such a shame
All finger pointing, hubris and blame
Post a witty quip
Then hop in your ship
And resolve your conflict in game.


I resolved to try and refrain
From posting here ever again
Alas, it is true
As is clear to you
That myself I have failed, for shame

Added:
If I could enter stuff I did in that 2004 thread it would be this one:

To victims:

I'm sorry I ruined your day
But please just let me say
I know it is tough
To lose all your stuff
But I make my living this way.
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#165 - 2014-03-24 16:32:22 UTC
A guy once AWOXed his corp to cause a commotion
But instead of being kicked, he got a promotion
Now he can't get out
Watch him scream and shout
As they chase his àss across the great black ocean

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."
Liafcipe9000
Critically Preposterous
#166 - 2014-03-24 18:46:45 UTC
After reading the OP,

Instant favorite! 10/10 would read whole thread.
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#167 - 2014-03-25 02:24:46 UTC  |  Edited by: Reaver Glitterstim
Reader discretion advised: the following limerick is very poorly written and should not be read by anyone.


I took to dinner with me a lady
She was Caldari, worked for Lai Dai
"That's a man!"
Shouted a man
When I saw the bulge I said "mayday!"

Edit: I think I just posted my worst yet in immediate succession after my best yet.

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."
Tau Cabalander
Retirement Retreat
Working Stiffs
#168 - 2014-03-25 07:17:04 UTC
Some quote about monkeys comes to mind for some reason...
Liafcipe9000
Critically Preposterous
#169 - 2014-03-25 08:32:29 UTC
The Lobsters wrote:
In space they can't hear you scream,
But tears they mine like coal seam,
Don't give them the joy,
when they try to annoy,
it's only a game,
Be serene.

this.

this wins in my book!
Tas Exile
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#170 - 2014-03-27 01:21:11 UTC
1 day left in the contest and then about 2 days for voting. Thanks to all who participated so far.

PilgrimInExile.wordpress.com
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#171 - 2014-03-27 06:23:27 UTC  |  Edited by: Reaver Glitterstim
I compiled a list of what I believe are my best works:

There once was a pirate from Siseide
Arties or missiles he could not decide
He finally chose beam
and on them put Gleam
Of all of his targets not one died


A pirate in Amamake saw an Ibis go by
With pilot named Donna, he knew it was Skye
She aligned to Osoggur gate
The pirate's guns fired too late
He raged on Scott's video "You're teaching a lie!!"


Pirate ship Nightmare, can you fathom
Larger but with smaller spikes than Phantasm
The Succubus looks meaner
But the Revenant cleaner
Seems as they get bigger, the smaller spikes they has'm


A guy once AWOXed his corp to cause a commotion
But instead of being kicked, he got a promotion
Now he can't get out
Watch him scream and shout
As they chase him across the great black ocean

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."
Crompton Aberforth
Gallente Federation
#172 - 2014-03-27 12:30:12 UTC  |  Edited by: Crompton Aberforth
There once was a ‘girl’ who played eve. Ja?
Oh come on, I just don’t believe ya!
Half the toons are a bloke.
The other half joke,
And tell everyone they’re a sheila!

Do you play EVE like a girl ...because um... you ARE a girl?

Do you know about the WGoE (Women Gamers of EVE) chat channel?

For access information visit the public chat room 'Women Gamers public'.
Ramona McCandless
Silent Vale
LinkNet
#173 - 2014-03-27 13:00:33 UTC
Came in expecting something about Stab City

Left with ennui

"Yea, some dude came in and was normal for first couple months, so I gave him director." - Sean Dunaway

"A singular character could be hired to penetrate another corps space... using gorilla like tactics..." - Chane Morgann
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#174 - 2014-03-27 21:39:24 UTC
Crompton Aberforth wrote:
There once was a ‘girl’ who played eve. Ja?
Oh come on, I just don’t believe ya!
Half the toons are a bloke.
The other half joke,
And tell everyone they’re a sheila!

Ventrilo reveals all, and yes, women play EVE.




They're mostly found in highsec doing PVE.

EVE Online is a game about spaceships
Shooting, pirating, mining or scanning blips
But the women I fear
Play fewer styles here
They work mostly for the agents' tips

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."
Mara Rinn
Cosmic Goo Convertor
#175 - 2014-03-27 22:26:34 UTC
Reaver Glitterstim wrote:
They're mostly found in highsec doing PVE.

EVE Online is a game about spaceships
Shooting, pirating, mining or scanning blips
But the women I fear
Play fewer styles here
They work mostly for the agents' tips


So many men who think they know gender
Believe women know nothing of fender
But deep in their hearts
they fear knowledge of arts
Will lead others to think them a bender

Day 0 Advice for New Players
Mara Rinn
Cosmic Goo Convertor
#176 - 2014-03-27 22:31:41 UTC
EVE is a game of phylogeny
And friend and neutral and enemy
the bizzarest of all
is friend to none all
and thus is of genus frenemy

Day 0 Advice for New Players
Duncan Ringill
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#177 - 2014-03-27 22:43:27 UTC
I amaze with my frigate kung fu
And to enemies bid fond adieu.
As I race through the 'plex
And I loot all their wrecks,
I tell them to aitch the eff-yoo.

http://badwrongfun.org
Snupe Doggur
Republic University
Minmatar Republic
#178 - 2014-03-27 22:53:43 UTC
Where once an inveterate scammer
Eluded the mighty ban hammer,
With fantasies facial
And thoughts mayonnaisal,
Now faces the virtual slammer.
Tas Exile
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#179 - 2014-03-28 11:06:42 UTC
Contest is closed. Thanks again to all who participated (some better than others...). I announce winners in a couple of days. Voting (by liking) will remain open for another day or so.

PilgrimInExile.wordpress.com
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#180 - 2014-03-28 17:34:07 UTC
OP can you post the runners-up in a separate thread? I feel like those who posted limericks first got a clear advantage as later thread readers liked their posts.

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."