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Limerick Contest

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Volar Kang
Kang Industrial
#121 - 2014-03-19 17:33:30 UTC
Erotica 1 wrote:
There once was a boy,
He cooked up a nasty surprise,
But it blew up in his face,
And now his dream dies,
But wait... there's more...

A sly Marmite leader made him his toy,
And asked for billions more isk from outer space,
Our Goblin friend said how great!
He continued writing for his master like a *****,
The rest of the universe with their jaws agape.


Ok that's a rough draft, be back later.



I dont think you understand what a limerick is:

The Rules of Limericks

Limericks, like all poetic forms, have a set of rules that you need to follow. The rules for a limerick are fairly simple:

They are five lines long.
Lines 1, 2, and 5 rhyme with one another.
Lines 3 and 4 rhyme with each other.
They have a distinctive rhythm (which I’ll explain shortly)
They are usually funny.

source
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#122 - 2014-03-19 17:35:14 UTC
Oh noes! I failed the rules!

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Volar Kang
Kang Industrial
#123 - 2014-03-19 17:38:54 UTC
Erotica 1 wrote:
There once was guild in the mountain,
They decided to come down to Foutain
They blew up some ships,
Sent TEST to Highsec in crypts,
And now TEST farms FW to plow a ton.

Ok, needs some work....


To be honest, this one is quite good except for that last line.
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#124 - 2014-03-19 18:01:00 UTC
Erotica 1 lied in her bathtub
With the water running, she started to rub
She got off three times
As she came up with rhymes
And that's how you get more to sub

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Seraph Essael
Air
The Initiative.
#125 - 2014-03-19 18:09:36 UTC
A pilot who hailed from Rens,
He did wear a singular lens.
They called him a ganker,
He's the carebear spanker.
The bots he did only wish to cleanse.

Quoted from Doc Fury: "Concerned citizens: Doc seldom plays EVE on the weekends during spring and summer, so you will always be on your own for a couple days a week. Doc spends that time collecting kittens for the on-going sacrifices, engaging in reckless outdoor activities, and speaking in the 3rd person."
Barbara Nichole
Royal Amarr Institute
Amarr Empire
#126 - 2014-03-19 18:49:38 UTC  |  Edited by: Barbara Nichole
Erotica 1 wrote:
Oh noes! I failed the rules!
Form, rhyme, and meter are important in shorter poems mainly because breaking the rules is more obvious than with longer poems. There are a few limericks here that deliberately break some rules and get away with it. They can get away with it because it's not only obvious that they knew the rules but that what they did was kind of as a surprising or funny ending to their poem.

  - remove the cloaked from local; free intel is the real problem, not  "afk" cloaking -

[IMG]http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a208/DawnFrostbringer/consultsig.jpg[/IMG]
Imiarr Timshae
Funny Men In Funny Hats
#127 - 2014-03-19 19:57:18 UTC
Eve online's players are all autists,
Mindless noobs or bitter vets,
They don't play the game
Just use forums and flame
All over internet spaceships.

Personal Standings Services - Free 3rd Party & Collateral Holding Service - 7+ Day Old Corps for Highsec POS Sales
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#128 - 2014-03-19 20:12:56 UTC
Volar Kang wrote:
Limericks, like all poetic forms, have a set of rules that you need to follow. The rules for a limerick are fairly simple:

They are five lines long.
Lines 1, 2, and 5 rhyme with one another.
Lines 3 and 4 rhyme with each other.
They have a distinctive rhythm (which I’ll explain shortly)
They are usually funny.

source
The 3rd and 4th line are short and concise, usually such that the reader can glide across them. 1, 2, and 5 are longer.


Writing a good limerick can be tricky
With readers who're all so picky
But if you slap
Up some bland crap
Peeps on the forum will think it's icky

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#129 - 2014-03-20 01:54:58 UTC
There's this man in Dodixie
He calls himself Mr. Fixie
He'll take your barge
No matter how large
That's why miners call him a prick, see?

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#130 - 2014-03-20 02:07:26 UTC
There's this girl quitting in Amarr
Her last name starts with "Bar"
She'll give you her isk
For only 1 trit without risk
But after you click she says "yarr!"

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#131 - 2014-03-20 02:11:03 UTC
There's a pod dealer in Rens
Says he gets golden pods from hens
For only a billion
your pod'll look like a million
But then he walks off- "pirate den!"

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#132 - 2014-03-20 02:15:43 UTC
There's this pirate in Hek
He'll sell you your wreck
You send the isk first
And see he's the worst
You should have done a check.

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#133 - 2014-03-20 02:22:40 UTC
There's a recruiter from VFK
He asks for your API today
He takes your stuff
Says it wasn't enough
Ha, you gave all your assets away!

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#134 - 2014-03-20 02:24:56 UTC
There once was a man named Sir Molle
He most certainly wasn't so jolly
We took his group down
He made a big frown
That was fun, my golly!

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#135 - 2014-03-20 02:28:13 UTC
Tolle, Manarq, Ourapheh, Botane, and Dodixie
These plus Carirgnottin mark the path from Odixie
The path may be far
To this distant star
If made in a shuttle, it isn't so rixie

I turned at Manarq to get to Sanctum
Emsar then Arnon, where I thanked em
Those sisters and that arc
Made me ISK till dark
All those rogue drones my destroyer tanked em

Twas not long before I departed again to Emsar
Once again to Manarq, and Tekaima after Tar
That ISK paved my way
For shooting miners AFK
And the rat kills kept my sec status above par

Since I'm here, I might as well run a mission
Beat some pirate ships to submission
I didn't get nearly enough LP
To buy from CONCORD's store, you see
They kicked me out of station because I couldn't pay admission

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#136 - 2014-03-20 02:30:00 UTC
There once was a man named Mittens
He liked to play with kittens
Then one day
He had this to say
"This space is no longer Britain's."

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Reaver Glitterstim
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#137 - 2014-03-20 02:34:32 UTC  |  Edited by: Reaver Glitterstim
There once was a dirty man named Mitten
Those who crossed his path looked bitten
He once went too far
A man's rep he did mar
He should do it again, I'm smitten Pirate

disclaimer: I don't actually support what The Mittani did to that guy. It was too far. But everything else he does that is almost too far is totally great :D

FT Diomedes: "Reaver, sometimes I wonder what you are thinking when you sit down to post."

Frostys Virpio: "We have to give it to him that he does put more effort than the vast majority in his idea but damn does it sometime come out of nowhere."
Erotica 1
Krypteia Operations
#138 - 2014-03-20 02:36:04 UTC
There once was an afk Miner
He played on laptops in a diner
He left the table to pay
came back with words to say
Bingo! He's such a whiner!

See Bio for isk doubling rules. If you didn't read bio, chances are you funded those who did.
Seraph Essael
Air
The Initiative.
#139 - 2014-03-20 02:38:36 UTC
A pirate once went on a hunt,
A Legion, the ship he did front.
He solo'd a 'phoon,
The ship did go boom,
In Local the guy shouted "You c*nt".

Quoted from Doc Fury: "Concerned citizens: Doc seldom plays EVE on the weekends during spring and summer, so you will always be on your own for a couple days a week. Doc spends that time collecting kittens for the on-going sacrifices, engaging in reckless outdoor activities, and speaking in the 3rd person."
Seraph Essael
Air
The Initiative.
#140 - 2014-03-20 02:45:54 UTC
An Alliance member once said,
Travel to Nullsec through HED.
If the gate doth be bubbled,
Do not be so troubled,
You're most certainly as good as dead.

Quoted from Doc Fury: "Concerned citizens: Doc seldom plays EVE on the weekends during spring and summer, so you will always be on your own for a couple days a week. Doc spends that time collecting kittens for the on-going sacrifices, engaging in reckless outdoor activities, and speaking in the 3rd person."