Intergalactic Summit

Why it has barely been day, I do believe, since I observed that a certain Matari corporation may as well have been populated by Gallente hipsters who cloned themselves into Matari bodies to prove how much hipper than all the other Gallente hipsters they really were, when [deep breath]: "Sacre Bleu!" I exclaimed to myself, "Mummy! That's it!"

Asynchronous insight is the very nature of progress.

A long time ago, in Amarr, not that far away, there was a secretive society of royal knights. These knights were charged with the collection and protection of relics, artifacts, and what have you. Among these were two items of particular note for present purposes: thick manly rod of creation; and, delicate little tiara of wisdom. After a long time, even for a long time ago (because the sands of Amarr do not shift and we are still who we were), the royal knights - convinced of their superiority, as is the nature of secretive societies tinted sanguine, decided to protect their charges from the depredations of greater society. Loading booty into sleeper ships - not Sleeper ships, but sleeper, well, actually, an interesting coincidence of terminology - and set off for Araz. Where they became the Takmahl.

After not that long, relative to a long time ago, the Takmahl experienced a schism.

Some among them took the delicate tiara of wisdom and headed toward Nebula Delve; others, with the manly rod of creation, headed for Nebula Gallente, where the locals had not yet rediscovered space travel. The manly rod would continue on a bit further. That is a separate tale. Yes, yes, Mummy is sorry for making you dig in the wrong place, sweeties, but we did have a lovely ceremony as a result and so it must surely have been the will of Heaven.

Anyway, Amarr's Sabik therefore came to Gallente space before the Gallente thought of space as, you, "space." Having just experienced a schism which destroyed their civilization, the formerly secretive society of knights became even more secretive. Furthermore, they knew that both the Emperor and quite possibly their rivals within the Sabik faith might come looking for them, some relics, a manly rod, all that. Damn! Where did the manly rod go!?

Anyway, the Takmahl were masters of genetic- and bio-engineering before most the rest of Mankind rediscovered tooth paste. This is where I should have connected the dots much earlier. After all, really, it was the little corpse bugs I found in Araz which inseminated the notion of lycanthropy in my lobes, you know, transformation of shape, and what better transformation of shape than body snatching?

Why, you can hide in plain sight!

Consequently, this order of secretive knights - you know, refuges, a lone spark of true civilization in the vastness of space, concerned about attack - abducted members of Gallente society and, through application of infomorphic and cloning technology, assumed their bodies and very identities. They of course infiltrated the ruling class of proto-Gallente civilization, you know, boy bands and pop stars. Everything worked quite swimmingly and we arrive in the modern day.

Does this mean that certain Matari corporations really *are* Sani Sabik cultists who purchased corpses from desperate Matari families (of which there are, let's face it, many) and assumed new physical identities while retaining pretentious Gallente personae? Now, I know what you are thinking, and I agree that such expository monotonists as those seem unlikely candidates for fascinating Amarrian corpse thieves, but you must also admit that it's good cover.

And that is, sadly, a good description of us.
Minmatar, who are actually Gallente, who are actually Amarr Sani Sabik. There's a holo that I want to watch. As long as Midna does the credits song, that is.

You're not one of the usual expository monotonists who comes out to play. How delightful! I adore the Gutter Press, and have even developed a soft spot for that Constantly Outraged Sebiestor.

Midna, Midna, Midna!

Now that is a name we have not heard enough of, recently; last seen in the company of Senator Black Eagle and General Inhonores... who, as I recall, was funding the construction of a youthful utopia from the proceeds of a rising Gallente pop star's record sales. Intriguing. What is it about the Gallidoodle music business that makes it such a hotbed of hot buns? Throughout history, I'm told, there have been many cases of cultural icons believing themselves to stand above the Federation's laws.

Speaking of standing above laws, Mrs. Hanvyner's Sacrilegious attackers are still out there. It was so exciting back in those days, when the Federation seemed caught up in a march toward war. Sadly, the big guns went limp after Gallente space got, you know, invaded - interestingly enough by what may have been a posse of Sani Sabik corpse thieves.

Someone get Lady Noh a seat at the Scope board of directors - their programme could use some spicing up.

It would appear the chief halfwit officer from the band of halfwit corpse thieves has at least dropped one imbecilic pretense. Perhaps the long overdue dissolution of Electrum Moron has dropped the pressure to be unusually stupid down a notch. One can only imagine what improvement might be possible after future inevitable dissolutions.

With respect to the expansion of consciousness, I favor (relatively) natural sources.

Mushrooms are not only cute, they address many different needs. My giant metal eating mushrooms were busy sprucing up Great Frozen Tekojarvi almost the very day after that big boat burned through two thousand kilometers of sky and crashed somewhere over the horizon. My internal simulations of the fungus addressing the wreckage itself were quite stirring. Over a period of roughly eight months, the burning hulk would have been covered by magnificent technicolor fruit and pulled down into the ground, where it's harmful metals would have been concentrated nicely behind meters and meters and meters of what might most easily be considered organic clay. Orbital salvage ships seem like such a Matari solution, frankly: drab and prone to a lot of rust dust.

More recently, I have a developed a new trabecular fungus that renders my formerly brittle lycanthropic Sebiestor bunny boy skeletons quite supple. This is important, because the poor things were suffering inconvenient spiral fractions when their long sinewy biceps and triceps and deltoids and firm round glutes flexed.

Unfortunately, there are some unintended thermo-electrical effects that tend to disorganize the central nervous system. I am confident, however, that the right adaptation of TMC derivatives will solve that problem. Some day, I even hope to produce a 100% natural lycanthropic Sebiestor bunny boy about eight feet long (being more of an all-fours kind of beast).

Oh, and vodka mist. That's natural enough.