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EVE Fiction

 
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A half-baked idea
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Turk MacRumien
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#1 - 2013-11-12 20:44:59 UTC
Couldn't quite come up with anything that would make sense with this bit, but I still like how it sounds in my head. I'd imagine something like this is all too common in 4-4 or amarr

“Sweet merciful Amarr, what is that stench?”

“Is… is that a body?!”

“Phew! Looks like we’ve found one of them weirdo wormholers! Nut jobs like to grab corpses and uh, preserve them.”

“Eesh. Remind me never to crew a strategic cruiser.”

“Like you’ll ever be qualified for one of those beauties. Anyway, I think we can agree that the label of “organic materials” is correct. Bolt the damn thing shut already, and make sure you seal it right.”

“I thought you’d never ask.”


Feel free to run with it, if you want
Telegram Sam
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#2 - 2013-11-14 20:34:02 UTC  |  Edited by: Telegram Sam
Boss: "OK, take this down, this is our ad copy: 'Cold storage for sale! Our climate-controlled facilities keep your corpse collection frozen at absolute zero, in a perfect vacuum. Guaranteed to preserve you collectibles just the way they were the day you found them, for generation after generation. Only 100 ISK per month! Special discounts for large collections! Or you money back-- add that in there after "generations." Got it?"

Henchman: "Got it boss. But how are we going keep them frozen and in a vacuum like that? We don't have any equipment. All we got is this cheap rental storage room."

Boss: "Tsk, tsk, you're not thinking Brammy. That's why I'm the boss and you're the assistant. We just cut a little hole in the wall, out into space. Let space in here and - voila! - the warehouse becomes a vacuum at absolute zero!"

Henchman: "But boss, what about when the customers want to see their collections? We going to give them spacesuits or something? And when we open the warehouse door, won't all the air get sucked out of the station?"

Boss: ".... .... .... Ah shaddup making your noise, Brammy, let me think...."