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Its time for a spokesperson, CCP.

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Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
#1 - 2013-07-16 20:03:22 UTC
Since so many want Eve Online to be like WoW, I believe its time for CCP to hire actors for spokespeople.

Wow had Mr.T. Who didn't subscribe because of him? I wanted to be a Night Elf Mohawk super bad after those commercials!

I believe its time for CCP to contact Matt Damon and give him an account, and put him in a commercial for Eve Online. It doesn't even have to be Matt Damon (Although that Elysium movie is coming out soon...and he will be all science fiction hero soon), it can be any number of celebrities. Id love to see Christopher Walken make a commercial about Eve, or even Bruce Willis! Who wouldn't scramble to hand over a years sub if James Earl Jones told you about ganking miners!

Its time CCP.

Its time for Eve Online to get a celebrity "I was there" commercial.

Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings?
Doc Fury
Furious Enterprises
#2 - 2013-07-16 20:09:16 UTC  |  Edited by: Doc Fury
Peter Dinklage.

"Those are brave pilots hot-dropping our gang. Let's go kill them!"

☼

There's a million angry citizens looking down their tubes..at me.
Chainsaw Plankton
FaDoyToy
#3 - 2013-07-16 20:19:17 UTC
I'd be tempted to go with an actress. I can just imagine a pretty girl saying "Oops" and then firing a massive alpha from a machariel blowing up someone's ship. all the neckbeards would eat that up!

@ChainsawPlankto on twitter
Plastic Psycho
Necro-Economics
#4 - 2013-07-16 20:20:43 UTC  |  Edited by: Plastic Psycho
Paul Reubens. In full 'Pee Wee Herman' character. Talking about ganking.

Chainsaw Plankton wrote:
I'd be tempted to go with an actress. I can just imagine a pretty girl saying "Oops" and then firing a massive alpha from a machariel blowing up someone's ship. all the neckbeards would eat that up!

Britany Spears, singing "Oops I did it again" in front of giant screen showing barges a'sploding as she punches 'F1.'
Adunh Slavy
#5 - 2013-07-16 20:21:06 UTC
It should be Samuel Jackson, "Say WoW again, mthr fckr!"

Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.  - William Pitt
Murk Paradox
Ministry of War
Amarr Empire
#6 - 2013-07-16 20:22:31 UTC
Adunh Slavy wrote:
It should be Samuel Jackson, "Say WoW again, mthr fckr!"



Yep.

This post has been signed by Murk Paradox and no other accounts, alternate or otherwise. Any other post claiming to be this holder's is subject to being banned at the discretion of the GM Team as it would violate the TOS in regards to impersonation. Signed, Murk Paradox. In triplicate.
Plastic Psycho
Necro-Economics
#7 - 2013-07-16 20:23:25 UTC
Adunh Slavy wrote:
It should be Samuel Jackson, "Say WoW again, mthr fckr!"

Flawless victory.

You win +1 Likes.
Jonah Gravenstein
Machiavellian Space Bastards
#8 - 2013-07-16 20:24:40 UTC
I'd go with Morgan Freeman talking about mining, even the most rabid PvPer would mine after seeing that.

In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.

New Player FAQ

Feyd's Survival Pack
Beekeeper Bob
Beekeepers Anonymous
#9 - 2013-07-16 20:25:18 UTC
Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:
Since so many want Eve Online to be like WoW, I believe its time for CCP to hire actors for spokespeople.

Wow had Mr.T. Who didn't subscribe because of him? I wanted to be a Night Elf Mohawk super bad after those commercials!

I believe its time for CCP to contact Matt Damon and give him an account, and put him in a commercial for Eve Online. It doesn't even have to be Matt Damon (Although that Elysium movie is coming out soon...and he will be all science fiction hero soon), it can be any number of celebrities. Id love to see Christopher Walken make a commercial about Eve, or even Bruce Willis! Who wouldn't scramble to hand over a years sub if James Earl Jones told you about ganking miners!

Its time CCP.

Its time for Eve Online to get a celebrity "I was there" commercial.



We need more people to lie to us about their plans? Shocked

Signature removed - CCP Eterne
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
#10 - 2013-07-16 20:25:53 UTC
Adunh Slavy wrote:
It should be Samuel Jackson, "Say WoW again, mthr fckr!"


Agreed. This.

Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings?
Takari
Promised Victorious Entropy
#11 - 2013-07-16 20:33:18 UTC  |  Edited by: Takari
Commercial opens with a Velator cruising through space, happy pop music playing as though through a car stereo, camera zooms out, a Dramiel is there, fires, frigate goes boom.

Shots of larger and larger Gallente ships blowing up with the same Dramiel nearby or in the background.

Cut to Emma Watson sitting at a computer screen cackling madly and screaming "Die! Die! Die!"

*fade to*

Back to eve in game where we see the Dramiel sitting quietly with Emma cackling with glee in the background. A full Gallente fleet rises up behind the Dramiel.

Everyone fires.

*Cut to look of surprise on Emma's face*

*Cut to the entire cast of Lord of the Rings with evil grins on their faces*

*Commercial ends*

*1 Billion Eve Subscribers*

"Roll the dice, don't think twice. This is the way of things. Welcome to EVE." ~ CCP Falcon

"Good luck, shoot straight and don't back down." - Serendipity Lost
Tenchi Sal
White Knights of Equestria
#12 - 2013-07-16 20:38:47 UTC
I can only see Chuck Norris representing EvE.
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
#13 - 2013-07-16 20:45:39 UTC
Tenchi Sal wrote:
I can only see Chuck Norris representing CONCORD.


Fixed.

Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings?
Ace Uoweme
Republic Military School
Minmatar Republic
#14 - 2013-07-16 20:49:30 UTC
Adunh Slavy wrote:
It should be Samuel Jackson, "Say WoW again, mthr fckr!"


He could be my pet, too!

_"In a world of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act." _ ~George Orwell
MeBiatch
GRR GOONS
#15 - 2013-07-16 20:59:13 UTC
Unsuccessful At Everything wrote:
contact Matt Damon .


wait i dont already have an account?

There are no stupid Questions... just stupid people... CCP Goliath wrote:

Ugh ti-di pooping makes me sad.
Plastic Psycho
Necro-Economics
#16 - 2013-07-16 20:59:14 UTC
Takari wrote:
...Emma Watson...

Just sitting and saying "I play EVE-Online" would get the +1Bn subscriptions.

But if we're going to be playing with really famous figures:

Bill Gates Ganking Larry Ellison.
Followed by Steve Jobs* ganking Bill.


*Sure he's dead. But EVE deals in clones and imortality...
baltec1
Bat Country
Pandemic Horde
#17 - 2013-07-16 21:00:00 UTC
Nathan Fillion

"Mercy is the mark of a great man."

[stabs Atherton Wing]

"Guess I'm just a good man."

[stabs Atherton Wing]

"Well, I'm all right."
MeBiatch
GRR GOONS
#18 - 2013-07-16 21:00:29 UTC
Jonah Gravenstein wrote:
I'd go with Morgan Freeman talking about mining, even the most rabid PvPer would mine after seeing that.


and my friend andy dufresne spent 25 years mining that rock.

There are no stupid Questions... just stupid people... CCP Goliath wrote:

Ugh ti-di pooping makes me sad.
Anna Karhunen
Inoue INEXP
#19 - 2013-07-16 21:07:26 UTC
Angelina Jolie's face, but Samuel L. Jackson's voice. Juuuust to confuse people.

As my old maths teacher used to say: "Statistics are like bikinis: It's what they don't show that's interesting". -CCP Aporia
Alpheias
Tactical Farmers.
Pandemic Horde
#20 - 2013-07-16 21:12:19 UTC
Jeremy Irons to talk about the cloak and dagger schemes.

Agent of Chaos, Sower of Discord.

Don't talk to me unless you are IQ verified and certified with three references from non-family members. Please have your certificate of authenticity on hand.
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