Crime & Punishment

Here is my bucket of tears... drink deep!

This is a tale of personal woe that I expect nothing from except if I am lucky ridicule, scorn, trolling and if not complete disinterest. I offer these tears as an exercise in self excoriation, a personal self flagellation with hooks on the cat o nine tails in the hope my sin (of stupidity) will be cleansed through shame and pain. May my tears be copied and pasted into the bios of my persecutors so my shame is known for ever.

My tears are offered to on bending knee to all members of Negative Ten alliance, but especially the dear little ***** who smart bombed me and my alts twice in one day passing through the **** hole they call Rancer, a puss filled refuge for their villainy not far from Jita. I am but a stupid, lame wormhole care bear who farms his sleeper sites and does his PI in a quiet backwater of wormhole space, patting myself on the back as I make my isk and tell myself how clever I am for avoiding fights most of the time, for I am but a pathetic excuse for a isk hoarding care bear. A coward who warps to POS and does something else when I can't make isk. I suck.

Living like Gollum alone and in the dark of my WH I occasionally venture out when the wormhole gods give me a non static exit to empire space so I may re-stock on fish, fuel blocks and the occasional treat. So it was yesterday when with glee I found a direct to high sec wormhole a paltry 16 jumps from Jita. A few jumps of low sec to go through would not, I assumed, present any trouble in shuttles for surely I would warp out of any camps before anyone could target me. I've done it before, I can do it again right? My goal was to return with some nice itty 5's which unbelievably a few of my alts can now fly where they could not before... oh joy, thank you for the dumb down CCP.


So off I set in fleet with two of my alts in 3 shuttles... confident I will easily make it to Jita. Then I hit Rancer, and warp into a delightful soul on my next gate in an Abaddon with very nasty large EM smartbombs. Three shuttles... three pods... all gone in the blink of an eye. Nice new Podding scene CCP cheers for that. And there goes 752 million isk in combined implants across three pods. Ouch. But that would not be enough to initiate this river of tears I now cry in public. Deciding to give it a few hrs I lick my wounds in Jita, (my clones conveniently placed there) re-equip my new clones with new implants and after some time head back to my wormhole feeling a cowed but not defeated. I go the way I came. That's right back through Rancer. In ships as paper thin as the shuttles I flew before. This time, it's three Rokhs merrily smartbombing away. My tears sting with a bitterness I have never before felt as I am dumped back in Jita. Total implants loss now over 1.5 billion as I sit at my screen shaking and wondering who to hate more... them or myself?

Now, in my 5 ½ year eve career I've made some shockingly bad mistakes, lost t3's to being asleep drunk on gates, orca's by jumping into low sec by mistake and even a freighter once (in high sec) and shrugged it all off and never once raged about it in so much as local let alone the forums. But for some reason, these assholes who rack up pod kill after pod kill after pod kill for sitting in there BS and spamming smartbombs has really pissed me off, (delicious tears aren't they). For the first time the ducts in my eyes are producing genuine rage tears... exquisite in their vintage I am sure for the collectors of such fine libations.

A perusal of the kill boards since these events informs me that I am far from alone in being a hapless victim of these smartbombing pod killers in Rancer. Is there nothing that can be done! In my wet dreams of rage I imagine retribution but lack the numbers myself. In my dream a coalition of the willing will emerge from every victim of a pod kill smartbombing to scourge these ***** from there system. Could such a thing happen? Most likely not but a guy can dream.

If you ARE interested, let me know and we'll see what kind of numbers we can put together. I would also like to hear from interested mercs who would be willing to take a long term contract to harrass these guys. Perhaps smart bombed podding victims could get a fund going to pay you guys, I would be the first to make a healthy contribution.

Hope you all enjoyed the tears, especially Negative Ten

o/

P.S. check my bio for the Kill mails

Sell the kill rights?

I can think of a few people you can hire to bring tears to those guys. Ask me in game.

Not that they're hard to find.... but I don't think any of them go in high-sec anyway so it's a nice thought but I wouldn't expect much effect from that.

When I first starting playin EVE we used to live in Rorsins, which is a few jumps from Rancer and no matter how hard we tried, there was no getting them to PVP. Near the end, just the sight of one of us showing up in local was enough to make their whole camp dock up and suck their thumbs until we left.

I don't know if much has changed but from what I hear it doesn't sound like it. I have a corp mate who used to be in Bl3h and he says the isk they make on that gate is pretty impressive though. Not to mention that ruining someone's day does have a certain appeal :)

People enter Rancer via a gate that isn't the one low-low entry into it?

Save the embarassing lossmail next time, and just self-destruct your ship and pod in a quiet highsec system.

When I was with Noir we took a contract with what seemed to be the opposite side of the Universe given the distance we had to travel to get there. Alek gave us, no ordered us..not to try the short cut through what is known as Rancer. Apparently some bad people lived there but looking at the map if one were to successfully negotiate through that system it would cut the number of jumps you would otherwise have to make in half.
I was brash and confident as I entered my ceptor for the trip. This ceptor I have...fast. Real fast. Rancer isn't like Null sec where they bubble the gates and all that nonsense. I got this! Besides what Alek doesnt know wont hurt him..or me.
I approach and enter Rancer without incident and remain cloaked expecting to see a fleet of pirates sitting of the gate. Whats this? A single flashing red battleship sitting on the gate. This s&*t is going to be easier than I expected. In fact a rhesis monkey could get through this system with no problem! Alek was clearly wrong and I thought how bad its going to suck for all those guys making that long journey as I decloaked and made my way to the next gate and on to my destination. Ha! The surprise on their faces...
The last thing I remember was another..single..flashy..red..battleship sitting on the opposite gate of Rancer and POP!

Woke up screaming in a medical vat liberated of my ship and implants. Wondering where it horribly went wrong. Posting my lose on the Noir KB. Alek chewed my a$* out like a piece of bubble gum for that stunt.

Point is, Jon, I learned from my mistakes. Took my beating like a man and moved on. No tears. Corp bit#* for a week...yes but no tears.

They won't engage. There is no point trying to fight them. The only real recourse is to dock them up by trying to kill them then sit on the nonstop. Then you are just sitting there and not doing anything productive or FUN either.

It is a lot like taxes. Sure there are ways around them but is the extra effort cost or risk worth it? Just go around and your problem is solved.

Besides they make a good overall filter for the gene pool. Most of us learn after a trip or two. And those who don't get "cleansed". It is a win win for eve on the whole.

Map -> Avoid -> Rancer

Honestly, I just didn't think it was necessary in shuttles through low sec. My bad. Lesson learned.

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."