These forums have been archived and are now read-only.

The new forums are live and can be found at https://forums.eveonline.com/

Crime & Punishment

 
  • Topic is locked indefinitely.
Previous page12
 

4 steps to idiot of the year award

Author
Istyn
Freight Club
#21 - 2012-07-01 11:12:52 UTC
Leeluvv wrote:

Shot the wreck with drones from the Hulk, instead of looting it. Clicked accept on the message, thinking it was a sec status hit message.
.


wat
Shriven89
Deep Core Mining Inc.
Caldari State
#22 - 2012-07-01 11:14:35 UTC
Vindicator pilot who autopilotted with -3.0 sec status... I bumped him off gate to make sure he died :D
Cpt Roghie
Chemical Invasion Co.
#23 - 2012-07-01 11:41:35 UTC
Shriven89 wrote:
Vindicator pilot who autopilotted with -3.0 sec status... I bumped him off gate to make sure he died :D



Things like these makes me want to live in high sec again.

Then I remember how fun it is blowing up randoms in Delve.

This could be fun.

GSXRSquid
Sarum Prime Innovations
#24 - 2012-07-01 23:19:55 UTC
Last July I hit a deer on my gixxer 1000. totaled the bike busted a rib and my hand. busted ribs hurt even with lots of morphine but too much makes you stop breathing. so they sent me home with lots of tramodol and hydrocodone, which lets you keep breathing but makes you stoopid
SO going home to play EvE sounds like a fine idea. I decide to take the orca out and fly to about 20 systems and load billions of isk in T2 fits, ships and other treats to do some housekeeping. heading back to amarr I has just one low sec system to get through and then home safe. oh wait, there was the "get through" part. since it takes the better part of a year for an orca to align and jump it didn't take long for some fine fellows to come along and pop my big ol orca. well I go pick up another orca and start the same process over again. Of course I have a lot fewer choice T2 and faction fits to pick up cause the others are gone. But still away I go, munching pain meds and loading up my fat ol orca with hulks and macs like i did the first time and other goodies. I set course for home and not paying attention ended up in a low sec system. even with the meds I realize this can't be good.
did you know a tiny little frigate can keep knocking a big ol orca off alignment until a bunch of his friends show up? yep it can.
After i got my little pod back to the hanger i logged and decided I would wait till i was off pain meds to play again





do i win the prize?!?!?!?!?!?
Nate Guralman
Pandemic Horde Inc.
Pandemic Horde
#25 - 2012-07-02 00:38:07 UTC
GSXRSquid has me beat, but I thought I'd share my story anyway.

Early in my EVE career, I bought an Iteron V to my haul missioning stuff around when I'd move from system to system to mission. Later, when I started my trading career, I kept using the Iteron, because it hauled stuff just fine. Except that I got pretty good at trading, and started hauling more and more expensive stuff. I never bothered to upgrade my hauler, or even any of the module.

Then one day, I had about 700M worth of stuff in the cargo hold. I guess that's the tipping point for suicide gankers, because that's what was in my cargo when I got popped.

What's really stupid about this is that by the second jump into my trip, I had that bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. And I got targetted twice by frigates. I knew I should have docked up and waited it out, or dumped a portion of my cargo or something. But I didn't, and it cost me 700M.

Fortunately, I live by the #1 rule of EVE, which is don't fly what you can't afford to lose.
Boomhaur
#26 - 2012-07-03 07:41:39 UTC  |  Edited by: Boomhaur
GSXRSquid wrote:
Last July I hit a deer on my gixxer 1000. totaled the bike busted a rib and my hand. busted ribs hurt even with lots of morphine but too much makes you stop breathing. so they sent me home with lots of tramodol and hydrocodone, which lets you keep breathing but makes you stoopid
SO going home to play EvE sounds like a fine idea. I decide to take the orca out and fly to about 20 systems and load billions of isk in T2 fits, ships and other treats to do some housekeeping. heading back to amarr I has just one low sec system to get through and then home safe. oh wait, there was the "get through" part. since it takes the better part of a year for an orca to align and jump it didn't take long for some fine fellows to come along and pop my big ol orca. well I go pick up another orca and start the same process over again. Of course I have a lot fewer choice T2 and faction fits to pick up cause the others are gone. But still away I go, munching pain meds and loading up my fat ol orca with hulks and macs like i did the first time and other goodies. I set course for home and not paying attention ended up in a low sec system. even with the meds I realize this can't be good.
did you know a tiny little frigate can keep knocking a big ol orca off alignment until a bunch of his friends show up? yep it can.
After i got my little pod back to the hanger i logged and decided I would wait till i was off pain meds to play again





do i win the prize?!?!?!?!?!?


Yes you win, but no prize you have to settle for still being alive.

I have to ask were you wearing proper riding gear? I have to imagine you were, to be able to hit a deer and only come out with some busted ribs and hand. Deers have a habit of being bad for cars and I imagine even worse for motorcycles and riders.

*Edited in*
Actually just read your name that should have answered my question, at first I thought the guy above me was just insulting you. For those who don't know SQUID stands for, Stupidly Quick, Underdressed and Imminently Dead or Stupidly Quick, Underdressed, Ignorant and Dangerous. And typically refers to motorcycle riders to ride recklessly.

Welcome to Eve. Everyone here is an Evil Sick Sadistic Bastard who is out to get you. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either trying to scam you or use you.

Signal11th
#27 - 2012-07-03 08:06:20 UTC
Humm mine was flying a pimp tengu into a 10/10 whilst extremely pissed and promptly falling asleep at the keyboard.

God Said "Come Forth and receive eternal life!" I came fifth and won a toaster!

FloppieTheBanjoClown
Arcana Imperii Ltd.
#28 - 2012-07-03 16:54:14 UTC
Go on a lowsec roam, get led into a highsec system by the FC who should have gone to sleep two hours ago, and NOT A SINGLE MEMBER OF THE GANG REALIZES IT. Find a Vexor mining and...wtf??? That's one hell of a bait ship! Uhhhhhh waitaminute. We're in highsec??? I knew I recognized this system name...

I'd like to nominate an idiot as well:

I was out scanning for wartargets with an alt and was checking out each signature. I landed on a hulk/orca pair and found they were in a mining mission...and the orca was empty. He had warped his orca to the site, ejected the hulk, and was jetcanning. My orca pilot was 20 jumps away and didn't make it in time to grab the ship this time, so I added this potential isk donor to my watch list.

About a week later, I ran locates on him and found him 10j from my orca pilot. I scanned him down, found him sitting in the orca in an already-cleared mission site. After several minutes he aligned and tractored in a jetcan. A few minutes after that, he emptied the jetcan and warped to a gate. Clearly he was preoccupied with other stuff and afk mining. I followed him to his mission station and got set up to probe him down quickly. Sure enough the orca undocks, warps to a mission site in system, and I hit him on my first scan.

My orca alt can also fly covops (he does other nifty things as well). I was able to warp to 10km off this orca that had just landed. He idled for a minute, then ejected a mackinaw and boarded it. He started mining and I sat for a minute, giving him time to go afk. Then I decloaked, rushed the orca and boarded it. I immediately scooped my cloaky ship and started aligning to station. Oh hey, it's got a 100MN mwd! I cycle that and I'm at warp in 10 seconds and docked up shortly later.

Looking through the loot, the orca had various T2 mining crystals and other goodies in it. There was a T2-fitted hulk in the SMA as well. The total haul was 1.1 billion when it all sold. The best part? He didn't even see it happen. Three minutes after the theft, there was a single line of text in local: "wtf???" I tried to be helpful and asked what happened (with a different alt even), but he never responded.

Idiot's name withheld so that I can check back on him in a month to see if he's learned his lesson, or bought me another orca.

Founding member of the Belligerent Undesirables movement.

FloppieTheBanjoClown
Arcana Imperii Ltd.
#29 - 2012-07-03 16:59:39 UTC  |  Edited by: FloppieTheBanjoClown
Signal11th wrote:
Humm mine was flying a pimp tengu into a 10/10 whilst extremely pissed and promptly falling asleep at the keyboard.

This reminds me of something that happened in my carebear days.

One of my best friends started playing Eve around the same time I did. We did typical carebear stuff: missions, mining ops, a few wormhole daytrips. During this time he lived with me for about a month while he started a new job in the area. One night we'd found a grav site worth mining and set up our hulks and an orca and set them to mining. He was doing some spreadsheets or something while that was going on, and at some point he fell asleep at his desk.

Not one to miss a golden opportunity, I went into ninja mode and docked his ship, ejected him from it, and returned his pod to the grav site while he slept at his PC. Then I docked up my stuff and logged out. He woke up about 10 minutes later. I'll let you imagine the confusion and panic at losing what was to us a very expensive exhumer that he'd only bought a few days before. I let him go a couple of minutes before I told him what I did.

Founding member of the Belligerent Undesirables movement.

flakeys
Doomheim
#30 - 2012-07-03 17:11:12 UTC  |  Edited by: flakeys
ZzeusS wrote:
Logging into a Trader alt to do some suicide shuttle exploring. Forgot all about a bunch of BPC's that I moved into the cargo earlier in the week to move to another region.









That's bpc's ... i had it with 2 retriever bpo's Blink

Edit:

OW and then there was this one time i had a pirating month.So i jump systems and behold a mining ship in the belt .My faction fit tengu gave him no chance to even blink. Unfortunatly i had not looked on the left corner properly to notice this was not low-sec but a 6.0 system.Concord gave me no chance to blink after i realised that .. Blink.
I did refund the guy his shiploss big time though.Yes C&P i like pirating but i dislike highsec ganking so i am the oddball who repays such a loss to his victim , SHOCK What?


Then i had that one time i set up a buy order , accidently the zero's didn't quite do what i wanted so i ended up paying 1.8 B isk in tax.

And offcourse when i started eve i mined my ass off for 2 months to get myself a raven.Mind you this was when the apoc was the ultimate mining vessel so some time ago.Anyway i build it myself , undock and do 3 jumps of wich the last one gave me a message.Eager as i was flying this monster of a battleship i decided to presss the ok , i mean it's not like the first time you dive into null your ship will be trashed in the blink of an eye.Well actually yes it will .. Roll

Not so bad as when i trashed my chimera i just purchased though ...

Or bought a badger for 100's of millions of isk ...

and i could go on for quite a bit here Lol

We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.

Batelle
Federal Navy Academy
#31 - 2012-07-03 19:05:54 UTC
Back in around May of 2011, I was living in Fade. In between CTAs I would scan fade and pureblind for combat plexes. After a particularly unlucky night scanning, I happened upon the serpentis 10/10 1 jump off our JB network. I was particularly thrilled because the loot potential was quite high, X-type armor mods and vindi bpcs were pretty lucrative, furthermore the serpentis 10/10 is stupidly easy. It was about 4am. I grab my ishtar and clear the site by about 5am. Unforunately, I get no loot. I COULD have just docked at the station that was right in system and gone to bed. I COULD have cloaked at a safespot or logged in a friendly pos.

I COULD have checked local.

Instead, pissed off about getting blue-balled by the RNG and exhausted, I warped to the outgate, that would take me to our JB network. And landed on a small Black Legion gang. I'm sure they were just as shocked as I was to land on the gate they were about to take. After about a second I tried to warp back to the station, but it was too late, the rapier forced me through the gate. I immediately decloaked and activated my cloak and afterburner, but being so close to home I opted for a t1 cloak, and so I was very easily decloaked and exploded. I told them to enjoy the loot and went home minus a ship and logged.

It was a fairly expensive Ishtar. http://eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=9571617

"**CCP is changing policy, and has asked that we discontinue the bonus credit program after November 7th. So until then, enjoy a super-bonus of 1B Blink Credit for each 60-day GTC you buy!"**

Never forget.

Yoshite McLulzypants
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
#32 - 2012-07-04 19:31:01 UTC
I'm fairly certain I could win this award in as little as 2 steps, perhaps one. Keep your eyes opened.
MacPhie
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#33 - 2012-07-04 19:37:00 UTC
GSXRSquid wrote:
Last July I hit a deer on my gixxer 1000. totaled the bike busted a rib and my hand. busted ribs hurt even with lots of morphine but too much makes you stop breathing. so they sent me home with lots of tramodol and hydrocodone, which lets you keep breathing but makes you stoopid
SO going home to play EvE sounds like a fine idea. I decide to take the orca out and fly to about 20 systems and load billions of isk in T2 fits, ships and other treats to do some housekeeping. heading back to amarr I has just one low sec system to get through and then home safe. oh wait, there was the "get through" part. since it takes the better part of a year for an orca to align and jump it didn't take long for some fine fellows to come along and pop my big ol orca. well I go pick up another orca and start the same process over again. Of course I have a lot fewer choice T2 and faction fits to pick up cause the others are gone. But still away I go, munching pain meds and loading up my fat ol orca with hulks and macs like i did the first time and other goodies. I set course for home and not paying attention ended up in a low sec system. even with the meds I realize this can't be good.
did you know a tiny little frigate can keep knocking a big ol orca off alignment until a bunch of his friends show up? yep it can.
After i got my little pod back to the hanger i logged and decided I would wait till i was off pain meds to play again





do i win the prize?!?!?!?!?!?

Disqualified for use of performance enhancing drugs.
Previous page12