EVE General Discussion

Greetings friends!

I'm here to tell you about an exciting new phase of the behavior correction program Goonswarm is sponsoring for the benefit of the EVE Community.

We've all grown to loathe the highsec miner - entitled, bleating that he deserves to mine in perfect safety in highsec. Demanding that highsec be made safe, that his hulk be buffed, and anyone who would be so unthinking and savage must be banned from the game. Hulkageddon V was a resounding sucess: cutting highsec mining in half and butchering over one trillion isk worth of ships. Hulkageddon: Infinity has continued this work, tearing those miners who had merely hid in a station for a month before bringing out their completely untanked hulk they wanted to afk in to shreads and causing nearly another trillion isk worth of destruction. This has been a fantastic educational program for the EVE community, and with your help we can make it even better.

Now, as you may have heard, our joint efforts against miners has caused a number of these pigeons of eve to flock to covetors. They reason that, because a covetor contains no technetium, that they will be safe from harm and able to once again mine in the absolute safety they crave. That people ganking them are the small-minded isk per hour cretins they surround themselves with. Secure in the knowledge that it would not be profitable to scourge them, they have taken to mining untanked, unaligned, afk: the very definition of the entitled human bot we have all grown to loathe.

We know that's not the case, and that's why we're proud to announce Hulkageddon Infinity: Jr. League. For every 10 mining barges - covetors, retrievers, and procurers - you gank, you will be reimbursed 25 million isk. This is more than enough to fit the 10 t1 fit destroyers needed. Now, of course, we'll continue paying you for the exhumers you gank: we would hate to slacken the pace of the exhumer slaughter. But if you find a field of covetors all busily botting away, there's no longer any need to leave them alone while you hunt down an exhumer to kill! Due to their weaker tank, they can be killed with a pure t1 destroyer - no need to fit t2, allowing you to continue your ganking indefinitely on the mining barge bounty. In fact, some mining barges are so lightly tanked that if you're willing to make the sacrifice and go -10, you can pod them with the very same destroyer that killed their ship and bask in the +5s and +5% mining implants they had plugged in. Many of these people believe that people cannot actually be podded in empire: the stern thrashing given by destroying their alpha clone may even prevent them from such activity in the future as they lose skillpoints.

We hope that by extending this behavior correction program to mining barges as well, we will finally reach those poor deluded souls that can be saved from venturing down the path of mining and to dissuade young impressionable eve players from making this terrible choice to begin with. With your help, and your vicious flogging of miners, we can make EVE a better place, where nobody mines peacefully, unaware of the world.

Payouts will be handled in the same way as regular Hulkageddon Infinity bounties: we are upgrading our software as we speak and the Jr. League bounties will begin immediately.

edit:

Edit: Damn!
How are multiple Exhumer/Barge Kills Handled?
Is it 10m/Exhumer and 2.5m/Barge untill you have 10 Kills and then the sum is paid out, or is it separate?

Let the canbaiting begin.

You sir are amazing.

Yesssssssssssss

This will end well.

I saw this coming a mile away...

Cannot say this will end well.



Edit: I was right!

Here is how CCP has decided to throw the monkey wrench in the works! Looks like the Goons initiative has been too successful and has resulted in the "renbalance" of mining ships. Good job everyone for the successful campaign against miners!!! (not sarcasm)

DEV BLOG:





As you can see, CCP is now taking a closer look at the mining ship class to make risk/reward the focus of the profession.

Didn't want that market anyways. ^_^

Excellent! No miner should be free from the fear of an injection of Sodium Pen-- Void S, or even Cyani-- Republic Fleet EMP S!

it allways amazes me how many nuet alts this kind of post brings to the forum :)