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Awesome parenting
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Grimpak
Aliastra
Gallente Federation
#21 - 2012-02-11 22:23:09 UTC
I honestly believe that the case here is she displayed a lack of respect for her parents.

I had it relatively easy in my upbringing. All I was required was to study, wake up on time and in return I was given a roof and food on the table.

The only thing that was intolerable in my home however, was disrespect. Did it matter that I had bad grades at school? Yes it did, but the punishment for that was next to nothing if I ever did stuff in the scope she did.

Remember, respect is everything.

[img]http://eve-files.com/sig/grimpak[/img]

[quote]The more I know about humans, the more I love animals.[/quote] ain't that right
Indahmawar Fazmarai
#22 - 2012-02-11 22:32:57 UTC
Micheal Dietrich wrote:
stoicfaux wrote:
So... how did daddy-who-works-in-IT get a hold of the daughter's facebook post(s)?




I bet it was super complicated. She probably set up her facebook to log in automatically (as a home page) and he probably accessed the internet to download something while he was working on it. And like any good parent, I'm sure he didn't want to pass up the chance to peek into his daughters life, whom he is still responsible for at least until she is 18, to make sure she isn't doing anything stupid.



Well, in a sense, she was doing something stupid that has ended quite bad for her laptop... Roll
Indahmawar Fazmarai
#23 - 2012-02-11 22:34:15 UTC
Grimpak wrote:
(...)

Remember, respect is everything.


So this is why it must be earned.
2bhammered
Cyberpunk 2077
#24 - 2012-02-11 22:46:03 UTC
Indahmawar Fazmarai wrote:
Grimpak wrote:
(...)

Remember, respect is everything.


So this is why it must be earned.



It is not easy to be a parent, I am sure he is a better father than many others. It is obvious that he cares and I would not go as far as to assume they have a bad relationship because of what happened. Now if more parents cared as much as he does, perhaps things would be for the better.
SeenButNotHeard
Perkone
Caldari State
#25 - 2012-02-12 00:14:30 UTC  |  Edited by: SeenButNotHeard
This thread makes me wince so hard it......makes me wince.

Guns are the answer to an angry teenager.

Good call,

Holy moly.

Edit: Idiots
Blane Xero
The Firestorm Cartel
#26 - 2012-02-12 00:51:52 UTC
For me, the part that struck a chord with me is how she has been blatantly lying about how she is being forced to do the chores for pretty much everyone, and that she is making herself out to be some kind of slave while claiming they already have a "Cleaning lady" [Who is, instead, no such thing] which shows a great deal of disrespect.

You have to take into account that she was warned against this sort of thing in the past, and she didn't learn her lesson, and instead escalated matters in such a way that paints the parents themselves in a dangerous light, when in fact it is completely inaccurate.

The guy probably just used the gun in order to stop her from whining insistently to get the laptop back, as he is in the IT business he knows better than to re-sell a laptop that a child has been using to get the money back, and simply keeping it around increases the likelyhood of her getting it back in the future in a moment of poor judgement, setting a bad example.

The girl just learned that trashing people has consequences, and that it isn't cool to exaggerate how bad your life is in order to get pity or attention. All I can say is, she better have learned her lesson by now or life is going to be one harsh taskmaster for her.

Resident Haruhiist since December 2008.

Laying claim to Out of Pod Experience since 2007, plain and simple. Keep the trash out of [u]Out Of Pod Experience[/u], If it's EVE Related or deserves a Lock, it does not belong here.
Merin Ryskin
Peregrine Industries
#27 - 2012-02-12 01:05:27 UTC  |  Edited by: Merin Ryskin
Blane Xero wrote:
For me, the part that struck a chord with me is how she has been blatantly lying about how she is being forced to do the chores for pretty much everyone, and that she is making herself out to be some kind of slave while claiming they already have a "Cleaning lady" [Who is, instead, no such thing] which shows a great deal of disrespect.


Because you know, people who post public videos of their angry rants and property destruction are always 100% honest. How do you know it isn't the father who is blatantly lying about being a complete {censored term for the end of the human digestive system} to his daughter?

(Or just making the whole thing up, since shooting a broken laptop is a small price to pay for internet fame.)
2bhammered
Cyberpunk 2077
#28 - 2012-02-12 01:12:42 UTC
Merin Ryskin wrote:
Blane Xero wrote:
For me, the part that struck a chord with me is how she has been blatantly lying about how she is being forced to do the chores for pretty much everyone, and that she is making herself out to be some kind of slave while claiming they already have a "Cleaning lady" [Who is, instead, no such thing] which shows a great deal of disrespect.


Because you know, people who post public videos of their angry rants and property destruction are always 100% honest. How do you know it isn't the father who is blatantly lying about being a complete {censored term for the end of the human digestive system} to his daughter?

(Or just making the whole thing up, since shooting a broken laptop is a small price to pay for internet fame.)



It is good to be skeptical, not so good to be cynical.
Astenion
University of Caille
Gallente Federation
#29 - 2012-02-12 02:24:32 UTC  |  Edited by: Astenion
Bottom line: if you treat your parents with disrespect in such a way, you should be punished. This was not the first but second time this had happened. Obviously she didn't learn her lesson the first time after having them taken away, just like all the bleeding hearts are suggesting. That tactic didn't take with her so he had to get drastic. Whether it were a pistol, a shotgun, an axe, or a sledgehammer, the point was driven home quick, fast, and in a hurry by destroying the computer he bought and maintained for her. "Your" computer is really "MY" computer because "I" bought it with "MY" money for you, and if you are going to live under "MY" roof and eat the food "I" provide for you and wear the clothes "I" provide for you as well, then you WILL respect mah authoritah. As long as you are under the age of 18, I am your legal guardian and I am responsible for your actions and will be held responsible should something serious happen to you. That said, if I feel that destroying something you take for granted that I gave you in order to snap you out of your self-absorbed haze, I will do it.

If you people can't understand that then you're probably still living with your parents because you're closer in age to the daughter than the father.

Were my child EVER to speak to me the way she spoke about her parents, I'd slap the mouth off of him/her. Oh, you wanna call the cops? Go ahead and call the cops. You'd better call an ambulance as well because your'e gonna need that one too.
Jhagiti Tyran
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#30 - 2012-02-12 02:39:18 UTC  |  Edited by: Jhagiti Tyran
Astenion wrote:
Bottom line: if you treat your parents with disrespect in such a way, you should be punished.


The thing is both the dad and the people cheering him on have confused discipline and punishment for petty revenge. All he did was destroy the laptop because it was the thing she used to make the comments that offended him. Teens being disrespectful like that behind their parents back like that is normal behaviour.

Every teen hates their parents at some stage, but all he has done is increased the resentment. It wont stop her making comments like that again either she just wont be using that computer, its changed nothing and possibly made her more resentful.

If he cannot get along with his daughter and things like this have been going on for a while its obvious there are deeper problems within their relationship. I would bet a weeks supply of cookies that as a person who destroys things in temper that the dad is as much to blame for the problems as the daughter. Both he and his daughter need to work on their relationship, as the responsible adult that's supposedly older and wiser he needs to begin the process. Punish and discipline her when she crosses the line but taking petty revenge isn't the answer.

As for the "he feeds her and clothes her and puts a roof over her head" side of the argument perhaps he should have thought about that 16 years ago, if he begrudges the burden of having dependants he should have kept his **** in his pants.
Astenion
University of Caille
Gallente Federation
#31 - 2012-02-12 02:42:27 UTC  |  Edited by: Astenion
Quick question for everyone between the ages of 30 and 40 (or up): what would have happened if you had spoken to your parents in that way when you were a teenager?

Now I'm posing the same question to those under 18: what would have happened to you?

Children have been coddled and gotten away with murder for the last 20 years or so, and it's gotten to the point where most young people are completely useless in almost every facet apart from being able to troll online. More often than not, you're going to find most (not all) late teens and early twenty-somethings show up to the party with an air of entitlement, laziness, and a compete disregard for authority and respect. Not everyone, of course...I'm not generalizing here, but I firmly believe there is a direct connection between lack of respect and being a mediocre drain on society. Had her father not intervened, she would've been on the path of just another waste of oxygen.
2bhammered
Cyberpunk 2077
#32 - 2012-02-12 02:45:22 UTC
Astenion wrote:
Quick question for everyone between the ages of 30 and 40 (or up): what would have happened if you had spoken to your parents in that way when you were a teenager?

Now I'm posing the same question to those under 18: what would have happened to you?

Children have been coddled and gotten away with murder for the last 20 years or so, and it's gotten to the point where most young people are completely useless in almost every facet apart from being able to troll online. Not everyone, of course...I'm not generalizing here, but I firmly believe there is a direct connection between lack of respect and being a mediocre drain on society.



Can only speak for myself, but I would get punished, but of course today it is considered assault to pull the arm of a child to prevent the kid from getting run over by a car...
Astenion
University of Caille
Gallente Federation
#33 - 2012-02-12 02:58:13 UTC  |  Edited by: Astenion
Jhagiti Tyran wrote:
Astenion wrote:
Bottom line: if you treat your parents with disrespect in such a way, you should be punished.


The thing is both the dad and the people cheering him on have confused discipline and punishment for petty revenge. All he did was destroy the laptop because it was the thing she used to make the comments that offended him. Teens being disrespectful like that behind their parents back like that is normal behaviour.

Every teen hates their parents at some stage, but all he has done is increased the resentment. It wont stop her making comments like that again either she just wont be using that computer, its changed nothing and possibly made her more resentful.

If he cannot get along with his daughter and things like this have been going on for a while its obvious there are deeper problems within their relationship. I would bet a weeks supply of cookies that as a person who destroys things in temper that the dad is as much to blame for the problems as the daughter. Both he and his daughter need to work on their relationship, as the responsible adult that supposedly older and wiser he needs to begin the process. Punish and discipline her when she crosses the line but taking petty revenge isn't the answer.

As for the "he feeds her and clothes her and puts a roof over her head" side of the argument perhaps he should have thought about that 16 years ago, if he begrudges the burden of having dependants he should have kept his **** in his pants.


I see your points and they are all valid, but I guess you didn't see the update to all of this. The girl adjusted perfectly fine to it, albeit being very angry at first. She got the point and realized that IT'S JUST A COMPUTER and that the bigger picture here is the lack of respect and not the somewhat over-the-top behavior of the father. Would I personally have shot the computer? Probably not. Do I think he was wrong in doing it? No, and I applaud him for it. I personally would've chosen a different route like selling the laptop or keeping it for myself.

Her father asked her if she wanted to comment on her side of the story and say anything else, he would let her post it on facebook because it's only fair she get her say. She said no, that it doesn't need any explaining. She said she was angry at first but she'll get over it and has learned a valuable lesson. She also said she thinks it's hilarious as they were reading all the comments on Youtube TOGETHER WITH HER FATHER, laughing at everyone saying how she's going to even be more rebellious, run away from home, commit suicide, etc. To quote her, she said, "It's just a laptop, pfft." So there goes your hypothesis right out the window.

I don't see the revenge idea, however. It wasn't revenge. He destroyed the tool she used to disrespect every single adult in her life. He didn't destroy her camera or her musical instruments, he destroyed that which she used to disrespect everyone. Furthermore, you still seem to be glossing over the fact that SHE HAD ALREADY BEEN GROUNDED FOR THREE MONTHS FOR THE SAME THING. They had already taken away her privileges, iPod, cellphone, FB, internet, PC, etc. and she just brushed it off. Now she'll think twice about how she behaves, and that was the point he was trying to drive home by destroying the laptop. It wasn't "revenge". It's not like he said in a hissy fit, "Oh yeah? Well, I'm gonna destroy everything in your room to punish you for talking back to me!" That's revenge.

If your parents buy you something as a child and you abuse it and abuse others with it, your parents are going to take it away. If you continue doing it even after you get it back, your parents are going to either throw it away or destroy it. This is no different. When I kept shooting my parents with my watergun as a kid, they took it away from me. When I got it back and shot them again with it after being repeatedly told to knock it off, they threw it away and I didn't get another one until I bought one myself. Same thing, only this watergun is a laptop.
Astenion
University of Caille
Gallente Federation
#34 - 2012-02-12 03:19:10 UTC  |  Edited by: Astenion
However, it does bring up the question if she DOES get a job and DOES end up buying a new laptop herself. Of course the father will have to set ground rules, but he may have to eat crow on it and would have to punish her in other ways since she bought it herself. Or not. It's still his house. If she were looking at pedo pr0n, he would get in trouble for it and not her, being her guardian.

I think it all boils down to "my roof, my rules". Of course that always sounds worse than it is. The father is obviously not a slave driver or an abusive father. Child abuse victims would never dare do something so publicly out of fear of being caught.

My little brother does the same thing. After coddling, therapy, medication, discipline strategies, grounding, talking, yelling, pleading, he just never got it. You know where he is now? Jail. My other two brothers who simply respect the rules my father put over them (they're twins, 14 years younger than me) get everything they want and need because not only do they work for it, but they show appreciation and respect his rules in the house. He bought both of them their first cars (used, of course) in order to get back and forth from work/school/college/everything else. They are at the head of their class and are off to university this year with full scholarships. They lived in the same house my other brother lived in, only he chose to do everything his way and disrespect everyone so he got the boot and is now in jail.

Ironically, the twins never got coddled. It was always the other one who was treated with kid gloves.
Jhagiti Tyran
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#35 - 2012-02-12 03:28:34 UTC  |  Edited by: Jhagiti Tyran
I will admit my opinion of it is biased, I find the idea of using a firearm to discipline a child, and the amount of public support deeply disturbing. That colours my opinion of it, so much so that my first reaction to her acceptance of it was that she is to scared to contradict her father on the internet in case he destroys more of her stuff.
Astenion
University of Caille
Gallente Federation
#36 - 2012-02-12 03:38:46 UTC
Granted, I was never disciplined with a firearm (of course speaking about destruction of my property, not shooting me LOL). I, too, find it a bit unorthodox; the method worked, however. Sometimes teens need a shock to their system, and I got several growing up. Things were taken from me that I never saw again, even to this day. They weren't taken out back and shot, but they were sold off. I learned each and every lesson, however.

I'll never forget the time my parents made me buy the vehicle they bought for me because I started taking things for granted when I was about 17. I didn't have any respect for the things they provided for me, as gracious as they were. One day they said, "Ok, that's it. We've had enough. That Chevy Blazer out there? Yeah, I'll take $2000 for it...and I know that's all you have saved up. Just be happy I'm not asking for more because I know it's really worth more than that." That woke me up REALLY fast. Had he gone out and shot out its tires, it would've honestly been funnier than serious from my point of view.

Were I to destroy something, I'd probably use an axe instead of a firearm. I think using a firearm is more showing off to prove a point.
Micheal Dietrich
Kings Gambit Black
#37 - 2012-02-12 06:19:42 UTC
2bhammered wrote:
[quote=Astenion]Quick question for everyone between the ages of 30 and 40 (or up): what would have happened if you had spoken to your parents in that way when you were a teenager?



Grounded constantly, put in a institution, kicked out from house and had locks changed on me, was told if I end up in jail I better get comfy, never went to prom. But the worst incident of all was they destroyed a bunch of my GI Joe's. I will make sure they never forget that heresy, oh yes, I will have it put on their grave markers.

Out of Pod is getting In the Pod - Join in game channel **IG OOPE **
2bhammered
Cyberpunk 2077
#38 - 2012-02-12 06:23:55 UTC
Micheal Dietrich wrote:
2bhammered wrote:
[quote=Astenion]Quick question for everyone between the ages of 30 and 40 (or up): what would have happened if you had spoken to your parents in that way when you were a teenager?



Grounded constantly, put in a institution, kicked out from house and had locks changed on me, was told if I end up in jail I better get comfy, never went to prom. But the worst incident of all was they destroyed a bunch of my GI Joe's. I will make sure they never forget that heresy, oh yes, I will have it put on their grave markers.



Quoting for prosperity Pirate
Surfin's PlunderBunny
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#39 - 2012-02-12 06:37:17 UTC
Micheal Dietrich wrote:
2bhammered wrote:
[quote=Astenion]Quick question for everyone between the ages of 30 and 40 (or up): what would have happened if you had spoken to your parents in that way when you were a teenager?



Grounded constantly, put in a institution, kicked out from house and had locks changed on me, was told if I end up in jail I better get comfy, never went to prom. But the worst incident of all was they destroyed a bunch of my GI Joe's. I will make sure they never forget that heresy, oh yes, I will have it put on their grave markers.


I'm 28 can I still answer as I was raised in a 3rd world country? I'd have gotten the **** kicked out of me (with some kind of bludgeoning tool, either a stick ((South Africa in the 80s, and we didn't have the rule of thumb... more like the rule of wrist. Also Boondock Saints reference Pirate)) or a belt.

"Little ginger moron" ~David Hasselhoff 

Want to see what Surf is training or how little isk Surf has?  http://eveboard.com/pilot/Surfin%27s_PlunderBunny
Micheal Dietrich
Kings Gambit Black
#40 - 2012-02-12 06:51:48 UTC
Surfin's PlunderBunny wrote:
Micheal Dietrich wrote:
2bhammered wrote:
[quote=Astenion]Quick question for everyone between the ages of 30 and 40 (or up): what would have happened if you had spoken to your parents in that way when you were a teenager?



Grounded constantly, put in a institution, kicked out from house and had locks changed on me, was told if I end up in jail I better get comfy, never went to prom. But the worst incident of all was they destroyed a bunch of my GI Joe's. I will make sure they never forget that heresy, oh yes, I will have it put on their grave markers.


I'm 28 can I still answer as I was raised in a 3rd world country? I'd have gotten the **** kicked out of me (with some kind of bludgeoning tool, either a stick ((South Africa in the 80s, and we didn't have the rule of thumb... more like the rule of wrist. Also Boondock Saints reference Pirate)) or a belt.



Would a belt be a bludgeon tool? I would think more of a flail or whip. Never got either but got a hand a few times though that stopped really early on. Never had anything in the way of physical contact and I didn't mind doing chores cause I got allowance for them.

Out of Pod is getting In the Pod - Join in game channel **IG OOPE **