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Curse of the Takmahl Statues !

Author
Shirley Serious
Gutter Press
#1 - 2015-11-09 19:49:50 UTC
News reaches Gutter Press of a horrific incident involving a Takmahl Statue in the Araz constellation.

The statue, being moved by Imperial Shipment, toppled over onto a group of Minmatar dock workers, crushing three to death instantly, and injuring several more.

While cargo handling accidents can and do happen regularly, with various cargoes, this latest incident is yet another involving the statues made by the Takmahl peoples, which has fuelled rumours that the statues are cursed.

According to an industrial accidents analyst for the Amarr Trade Registry, the accident rate involving shipments of Takmahl statues is significantly above average, for objects of that size and weight.

The worst incident was when a group of Takmahl statues being transported aboard a Sigil class vessel, shifted in the cargo hold, and somehow punctured an adjacent cargo compartment, and the outer hull itself, leading to the deaths of several hundred mostly Minmatar passengers.

Even when not being transported, the Takmahl statues have been involved in a number of incidents that defy rational explanation.

A Theology Council inquisitor, observing the destruction of one statue, was seriously injured by a stone chip that flew several hundred metres from the statue as it was destroyed by explosives.

The Theology Council considers many Takmahl statues to be blasphemous, with others considered heretical, particularly those statues that purport to depict God.

Gutter Press agents spoke to several people in Araz, to gather their opinions.

"I'm not saying they're cursed, but, well, they kind of are cursed", said one Ni-Kunni man.

"Ghastly things. The Navy should laser them from orbit", said a True Amarr woman.

"The End Times are upon us!", opined one wild-haired hermit.


A series of coincidences ? Possibly, but if the statues really are cursed, surely the question is, by whom ? and why ?


Gutter Press. News.

Just the facts.

Calliste Dauvienne
Doomheim
#2 - 2015-11-09 22:21:28 UTC
This has reminded me to record the new seasons of those Amarrian procedural Inquisitor investigation shows.

I'm sure someone like Inquisitor Arakalim on the scene would quip something like, "Whoever owned these statues will be... crushed if they knew," Before he flicks up his hood and the scene cuts out to a random montage of Dam-Torsad skyline.

Or his Vherokior forensic doyen, Saravar would say, "Oh, crushed like these dock workers you mean?" Then Arkalim would just look at him and shake his head.
Nauplius
Hoi Andrapodistai
#3 - 2015-11-09 22:35:20 UTC
Shirley Serious, can we go on another date, please? I miss you.

Anyanka Funk
Doomheim
#4 - 2015-11-09 22:37:36 UTC
Nauplius wrote:
Shirley Serious, can we go on another date, please? I miss you.


I have a weird suspicion that Nauplius somehow has something to do with this article.
Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#5 - 2015-11-09 23:00:34 UTC
Take one for the team and go on a date with him! Maybe he won't hate his life as much and stop pointlessly killing people for a while. It's your journalistic duty...... Or something like that........ I dunno...
Diana Kim
Caldari Colonial Defense Ministry
Templis CALSF
#6 - 2015-11-09 23:58:35 UTC
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.

Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#7 - 2015-11-10 00:25:27 UTC
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..

That or inadequate work environments created by the Amarr...
Neph
Crimson Serpent Syndicate
#8 - 2015-11-10 00:37:44 UTC
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..


Quote:
A Theology Council inquisitor, observing the destruction of one statue, was seriously injured by a stone chip that flew several hundred metres from the statue as it was destroyed by explosives.


Also, it was stated that the rate of accidents involving these statues was abnormally high. Since presumably the same Minmatar workers are responsible for securing/unloading/destroying these statues as any other products, if it were truly Minmatar incompetence that was responsible, the accident rate should be normal. Therefore, I think we can rule that one out.

~ Gariushi YC110 // Midular YC115 // Yanala YC115 ~

"Orte Jaitovalte sitasuyti ne obuetsa useuut ishu. Ketsiak ishiulyn." -Yakiya Tovil-Toba-taisoka

Anyanka Funk
Doomheim
#9 - 2015-11-10 00:42:04 UTC
Deitra Vess wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..

That or inadequate work environments created by the Amarr...

You know... It could also be an insurance scam perpetrated by the Minmatar victims spouses. Those cunning Minmatar, just like the way they intentionally lose the forever war to drive up republic fleet prices...
Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#10 - 2015-11-10 00:45:49 UTC
Anyanka Funk wrote:
Deitra Vess wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..

That or inadequate work environments created by the Amarr...

You know... It could also be an insurance scam perpetrated by the Minmatar victims spouses. Those cunning Minmatar, just like the way they intentionally lose the forever war to drive up republic fleet prices...

The second part of what you said unfortunately is true I hate to say. But slaves don't get insurance.
Diana Kim
Caldari Colonial Defense Ministry
Templis CALSF
#11 - 2015-11-10 03:15:56 UTC
Deitra Vess wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..

That or inadequate work environments created by the Amarr...

Pfft! "Inadequate work environments".

Do you know what Civire worker would say, if he would need to transport these statues under temperature -100 degrees and wind about 200km/h?
"Easy!".

And these were in a controlled environment in a Sigil transport. Minmatars are sissies.

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.

Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#12 - 2015-11-10 03:23:42 UTC  |  Edited by: Omega Jovakko
Neph wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..


Quote:
A Theology Council inquisitor, observing the destruction of one statue, was seriously injured by a stone chip that flew several hundred metres from the statue as it was destroyed by explosives.


Also, it was stated that the rate of accidents involving these statues was abnormally high. Since presumably the same Minmatar workers are responsible for securing/unloading/destroying these statues as any other products, if it were truly Minmatar incompetence that was responsible, the accident rate should be normal. Therefore, I think we can rule that one out.



I think I have to agree, incompetence would typically result in a stable occurrence, as was mentioned prior. For some reason I can't see this as paranormal, but instead a form of sabotage, maybe not to collect insurance because again, slaves can't be insured, but maybe on the part of a Minmatarian? Or perhaps even a worker them-self, sure, a chip flying at a Council inquisitor is odd, but that's not impossible. It may have just been blind luck for our saboteur, If you really break it down, if we assume that the same workers are involved in every event, it is ENTIRELY possible for this to be a message of some sort against the companies, maybe it's a small form of revolt that is working out to their benefit due to it's seemingly superstitious nature. I can't be sure since I am only hearing of this for the first time here. But until otherwise proven I'll go ahead and think that we have a courageous worker who wants to be out of that business

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

Diana Kim
Caldari Colonial Defense Ministry
Templis CALSF
#13 - 2015-11-10 03:24:44 UTC
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Neph wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..


Quote:
A Theology Council inquisitor, observing the destruction of one statue, was seriously injured by a stone chip that flew several hundred metres from the statue as it was destroyed by explosives.


Also, it was stated that the rate of accidents involving these statues was abnormally high. Since presumably the same Minmatar workers are responsible for securing/unloading/destroying these statues as any other products, if it were truly Minmatar incompetence that was responsible, the accident rate should be normal. Therefore, I think we can rule that one out.



I think I have to agree, incompetence would typically result in a stable occurrence, as was mentioned prior. For some reason I can't see this as paranormal, but instead a form of sabotage, maybe not to collect insurance because again, slaves can't be insured, but maybe on the part of a Minmatarian? Or perhaps even a worker them-self, sure, a chip flying at a Council inquisitor is odd, but that's not impossible. It may have just been blind luck for our saboteur, If you really break it down, if we assume that the same workers are involved in every event, it is ENTIRELY possible for this to be a message of some sort against the companies, maybe it's a small form of revolt that is working out to their benefit due to the Minmatar's seemingly superstitious nature. I can't be sure since I am only hearing of this for the first time here. But until otherwise proven I'll go ahead and think that we have a courageous worker who wants to be out of that business

Minmatar terrorists.

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.

Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#14 - 2015-11-10 03:26:59 UTC  |  Edited by: Omega Jovakko
Diana Kim wrote:

Minmatar terrorists.


^That, basically what i'm trying to say in two words
It would probably not be just one, something like that would require more than a single individual, perhaps a small group. a number small enough to slip in and out of work manifests without showing up on investigations, but numerous enough to set up a large scale event like the hull breach.

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#15 - 2015-11-10 03:27:37 UTC
Diana Kim wrote:
Deitra Vess wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:
Have you noticed, how these statues hurt exclusively Minmatar personnel?

Why haven't you thought it isn't actually statue curse, but incompetence of said minmatars?..

That or inadequate work environments created by the Amarr...

Pfft! "Inadequate work environments".

Do you know what Civire worker would say, if he would need to transport these statues under temperature -100 degrees and wind about 200km/h?
"Easy!".

And these were in a controlled environment in a Sigil transport. Minmatars are sissies.

Right....... Right before hypothermia kicked in and they froze to death. I guess we're sissies for not volunteering to kill ourselves.... And you say were barbaric, rather be barbaric than a mindless puppet.
Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#16 - 2015-11-10 03:29:01 UTC
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:

Minmatar terrorists.


^That, basically what i'm trying to say in two words

At least we've had some success in our wars.
Omega Jovakko
Doomheim
#17 - 2015-11-10 03:32:38 UTC
Deitra Vess wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:

Minmatar terrorists.


^That, basically what i'm trying to say in two words

At least we've had some success in our wars.


Terrorism works, any first class Military specialist should accept it. it's true that sometimes the best way to send a message, or to overthrow your opponent is to resort to guerrilla tactics like this. I certainly would if I wanted to cripple a trading company.

Also, really? that hurt

"Let them try and come. They've got 3 for every 1 of ours, it'll be a great time"

Diana Kim
Caldari Colonial Defense Ministry
Templis CALSF
#18 - 2015-11-10 03:38:56 UTC
Deitra Vess wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:

Minmatar terrorists.


^That, basically what i'm trying to say in two words

At least we've had some success in our wars.

By rigging statues and hurting yourselves?
I can't say I envy such colossal success. Poor Theology Council inquisitor...

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.

Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#19 - 2015-11-10 03:39:49 UTC
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Deitra Vess wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:

Minmatar terrorists.


^That, basically what i'm trying to say in two words

At least we've had some success in our wars.


Terrorism works, any first class Military specialist should accept it. it's true that sometimes the best way to send a message, or to overthrow your opponent is to resort to guerrilla tactics like this. I certainly would if I wanted to cripple a trading company.

Also, really? that hurt

Go thank the Gallante for peacefully giving your home world back before Kim spits on them again and calls them war mongers. And yes, terrorism works quite well.
Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#20 - 2015-11-10 03:40:47 UTC
Diana Kim wrote:
Deitra Vess wrote:
Omega Jovakko wrote:
Diana Kim wrote:

Minmatar terrorists.


^That, basically what i'm trying to say in two words

At least we've had some success in our wars.

By rigging statues and hurting yourselves?
I can't say I envy such colossal success. Poor Theology Council inquisitor...

What the? What does terrorism have to do with statues falling in this case?
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