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Crime & Punishment

 
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The Pirate Story Thread

First post First post
Author
Kaivar Lancer
Doomheim
#1041 - 2015-07-27 23:47:14 UTC  |  Edited by: Kaivar Lancer
Noragen Neirfallas wrote:
Kaivar Lancer wrote:
^ Next step is to kill a T3 in a battle Venture. :)

Ive seen a tengu killed by a firetail Blink

CoolCool


Hmmmm... Tengu eh? I can't quite match that (yet). :) But hopefully the following tale will be almost as inspirational.

The day I soloed a Cynabal... in a T1 dessie

After a bout of "yarring" in low sec against neutrals, I withdrew my ship back to Orvolle to restock and repair my ship. I'm flashy yellow as a suspect, but it didn't bother me as I was warping to station. As I exit warp and land on Orvolle I (the local trade hub), I notice a Cynabal lock onto me and dent my shield. There was no significant damage, though, and I docked a split-second later.

As I waited for the suspect timer to end, I thought about the Cynabal waiting outside. Apparently it was piloted by a FW ganker, looking for legit targets to blap as they exit their warp to Orvolle I. I wasn't familiar with the Cynabal, and looked it up on the market. It appeared to be an expensive cruiser-sized ship.

I was still green in terms of PVP, but I saw this as an opportunity to get some experience versus bigger hulls. All I had available was the cheap T1 destroyer I came in (an Algos), so losing it would be no great deal.

I had some experience hunting clone rats in low sec, and knew how to "speed tank" by flying under a cruiser's guns. Since I was going to fight a human player, and not a dumb AI, I felt I had to improve my destroyer's fit. I fitted low friction nozzle rigs to increase my ship's agility, damage control + 2 x drone damage amplifiers to my lows, web + scram + 1MN AB to my mids and blasters to my high. My DPS was very good. My tank, not so much. In fact, besides the DC, it was non-existent.

Once my suspect timer ended, I undocked and looked around for the Cynabal. Sure enough, it was still outside the station. Or rather, it was behind the station. The pilot had cleverly placed his ship behind the station's walls, creating an obstacle between him and his prey. While his artillery can shoot through the walls, any ship that wanted to brawl would have to fly around or over the walls to engage him, buying him valuable DPS time. Very clever.

As I was no longer suspect, the Cynabal obviously chose not to engage me, and I was disappointed about refitting my ship for no reason. At this point, my subconscious and instinct took over. For no reason whatsoever, I decided to fly over the station's walls and "bump" the Cynabal, in the vain hope of being attacked and getting the Cynabal concorded. No dice. The Cynabal didn't respond. I orbited and bumped him for a few more seconds, and got bored. Just before I warped away to a star gate, I thought the pilot had a pretty cool hiding spot behind the station, and bookmarked it, just in case. Again, this was just all instinct.

As I entered warp, I suddenly received a duel request from the Cynabal pilot. My anti-spam reflex quickly rejected the duel request. I slapped myself a second later. This was actually what I wanted! Too many hours in Jita and Dodixie will do that to you. I exited warp at the star gate, and issued my own duel request back to the Cynabal. It was accepted.

The battle was on!

Perhaps the Cynabal was expecting me to warp back to station, and blap me from a distance as he hid behind the station. But I was armed with his bookmark. I warp back and land within 5000m of the Cynabal. PERFECT! The predator has become the prey! My instincts from hunting cruiser-sized NPCs take over, and I orbit at 500m, shredding him with my blasters and drones.

The Cynabal was helpless. Or so I thought. It couldn't hit me and it had no web, but I saw it slowly turn... and casually warp away. Noooo! I'd forgotten to turn on my scram!!! Typical PVP newbie mistake.

I sat there for 20 seconds, cursing my own stupidity. But still, I didn't die. A tie between a Cynabal vs T1 dessie is still pretty good, right?

As I contemplate what to do next, I suddenly see the Cynabal return on my overview. The duel was back on! He had warped to station, and was 20km in front of me. Between us was the station's walls. In order to engage him, I'd have to fly over the walls and cover the 20km without getting hit too much.

I overheat my AB and fly straight up to clear the walls, just as the Cynabal's DPS begins to land. As I clear the station, my shield alarm rings and I'm down to armour. Three or four more hits and I'm dead.

I'm clear of the walls. All that's left between me and the Cynabal is 20km of empty space. I turn my ship and double-click to the side of the Cynabal, propelling my ship towards him while retaining some angular velocity.

Bam! Bam! Two hits, and I'm almost in hull. One more hit, and I'm probably dead. As I close the distance to 10km, I suddenly notice messages about the Cynabal's howitzers missing me. I might just make it.

Sure enough, I cover the distance. I flick on the blasters and sick my drones on the Cynabal while orbiting at 500m. As I wither his shields to nothing, I go through a rushed checklist in my head. Scram on? Check. Cap stable? Check. Orbit distance good? Check. Speed okay? Check. Enough ammo? Check. Guns overheated? 70% damage!!! During the initial stage of the duel, I had overheated my guns, and totally forgot about it. I turn off overheating before I lost all my guns.

The process of popping the Cynabal took a few minutes. In the end, I actually felt a little bad, blowing up 185m isk of spaceship in a 7m fit, and offered the following in local chat:

[ 2015.06.21 14:45:00 ] Kaivar Lancer > sorry buddy

But I only felt a little bad.

Killmail
https://zkillboard.com/kill/47407590/
Noragen Neirfallas
Emotional Net Loss
#1042 - 2015-07-28 01:49:23 UTC
Kaivar Lancer wrote:
Noragen Neirfallas wrote:
Kaivar Lancer wrote:
^ Next step is to kill a T3 in a battle Venture. :)

Ive seen a tengu killed by a firetail Blink

CoolCool


Hmmmm... Tengu eh? I can't quite match that (yet). :) But hopefully the following tale will be almost as inspirational.

The day I soloed a Cynabal... in a T1 dessie

After a bout of "yarring" in low sec against neutrals, I withdrew my ship back to Orvolle to restock and repair my ship. I'm flashy yellow as a suspect, but it didn't bother me as I was warping to station. As I exit warp and land on Orvolle I (the local trade hub), I notice a Cynabal lock onto me and dent my shield. There was no significant damage, though, and I docked a split-second later.

As I waited for the suspect timer to end, I thought about the Cynabal waiting outside. Apparently it was piloted by a FW ganker, looking for legit targets to blap as they exit their warp to Orvolle I. I wasn't familiar with the Cynabal, and looked it up on the market. It appeared to be an expensive cruiser-sized ship.

I was still green in terms of PVP, but I saw this as an opportunity to get some experience versus bigger hulls. All I had available was the cheap T1 destroyer I came in (an Algos), so losing it would be no great deal.

I had some experience hunting clone rats in low sec, and knew how to "speed tank" by flying under a cruiser's guns. Since I was going to fight a human player, and not a dumb AI, I felt I had to improve my destroyer's fit. I fitted low friction nozzle rigs to increase my ship's agility, damage control + 2 x drone damage amplifiers to my lows, web + scram + 1MN AB to my mids and blasters to my high. My DPS was very good. My tank, not so much. In fact, besides the DC, it was non-existent.

Once my suspect timer ended, I undocked and looked around for the Cynabal. Sure enough, it was still outside the station. Or rather, it was behind the station. The pilot had cleverly placed his ship behind the station's walls, creating an obstacle between him and his prey. While his artillery can shoot through the walls, any ship that wanted to brawl would have to fly around or over the walls to engage him, buying him valuable DPS time. Very clever.

As I was no longer suspect, the Cynabal obviously chose not to engage me, and I was disappointed about refitting my ship for no reason. At this point, my subconscious and instinct took over. For no reason whatsoever, I decided to fly over the station's walls and "bump" the Cynabal, in the vain hope of being attacked and getting the Cynabal concorded. No dice. The Cynabal didn't respond. I orbited and bumped him for a few more seconds, and got bored. Just before I warped away to a star gate, I thought the pilot had a pretty cool hiding spot behind the station, and bookmarked it, just in case. Again, this was just all instinct.

As I entered warp, I suddenly received a duel request from the Cynabal pilot. My anti-spam reflex quickly rejected the duel request. I slapped myself a second later. This was actually what I wanted! Too many hours in Jita and Dodixie will do that to you. I exited warp at the star gate, and issued my own duel request back to the Cynabal. It was accepted.

The battle was on!

Perhaps the Cynabal was expecting me to warp back to station, and blap me from a distance as he hid behind the station. But I was armed with his bookmark. I warp back and land within 5000m of the Cynabal. PERFECT! The predator has become the prey! My instincts from hunting cruiser-sized NPCs take over, and I orbit at 500m, shredding him with my blasters and drones.

The Cynabal was helpless. Or so I thought. It couldn't hit me and it had no web, but I saw it slowly turn... and casually warp away. Noooo! I'd forgotten to turn on my scram!!! Typical PVP newbie mistake.

I sat there for 20 seconds, cursing my own stupidity. But still, I didn't die. A tie between a Cynabal vs T1 dessie is still pretty good, right?

As I contemplate what to do next, I suddenly see the Cynabal return on my overview. The duel was back on! He had warped to station, and was 20km in front of me. Between us was the station's walls. In order to engage him, I'd have to fly over the walls and cover the 20km without getting hit too much.

I overheat my AB and fly straight up to clear the walls, just as the Cynabal's DPS begins to land. As I clear the station, my shield alarm rings and I'm down to armour. Three or four more hits and I'm dead.

I'm clear of the walls. All that's left between me and the Cynabal is 20km of empty space. I turn my ship and double-click to the side of the Cynabal, propelling my ship towards him while retaining some angular velocity.

Bam! Bam! Two hits, and I'm almost in hull. One more hit, and I'm probably dead. As I close the distance to 10km, I suddenly notice messages about the Cynabal's howitzers missing me. I might just make it.

Sure enough, I cover the distance. I flick on the blasters and sick my drones on the Cynabal while orbiting at 500m. As I wither his shields to nothing, I go through a rushed checklist in my head. Scram on? Check. Cap stable? Check. Orbit distance good? Check. Speed okay? Check. Enough ammo? Check. Guns overheated? 70% damage!!! During the initial stage of the duel, I had overheated my guns, and totally forgot about it. I turn off overheating before I lost all my guns.

The process of popping the Cynabal took a few minutes. In the end, I actually felt a little bad, blowing up 185m isk of spaceship in a 7m fit, and offered the following in local chat:

[ 2015.06.21 14:45:00 ] Kaivar Lancer > sorry buddy

But I only felt a little bad.

Killmail
https://zkillboard.com/kill/47407590/

never feel bad. +1 time well spent reading

Member and Judge of the Court of Crime and Punishment

Noragens basically the Chribba of C&P - Zimmy Zeta

Confirming that we all play in Noragen's eve. - BeBopAReBop

ISD Buldath favorite ISD

'"****station games" - Sun Tzu' - Ralph King Griffin

Leto Thule
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#1043 - 2015-07-30 05:00:26 UTC
Good read. I miss those days.

Thunderdome ringmaster, Community Leader and Lord Inquisitor to the Court of Crime and Punishment

Hadrian Blackstone
Yamato Holdings
#1044 - 2015-07-30 20:10:54 UTC
Wow nice kill. I was wondering why he didn't keep range on you, then I saw the KM - no prop mod whatsoever, on a ship that needs to be at range. That's just turrible.
Omar Alharazaad
New Eden Tech Support
#1045 - 2015-08-01 13:42:21 UTC  |  Edited by: Omar Alharazaad
So I got a little bored this morning and decided to see if I could stir up some trouble nearby. No other Devils online but a few PIRAT's active, so I headed the opposite direction.

I asked myself, 'self, what have you not done in a while?' the answer was of course obvious... I haven't flipped any missions in some time and faced with either a clone jump or 30 warps to minmatar space things were looking a bit bleak.

Screw it. I hopped over to Dresi with a Fed Navy Comet and set the scanning slave to work. A Navy Harby who just wouldn't bite. Fine. An Apocalypse who seemed to be jumping around just to **** me off. **** him. I went to Aphend.

Parked the scanning slave a distance off of the sun and set him to work. Hmm. Battleship? Alrighty. Wait, Navy Apocalypse? **** YEAH. Omar Warps in and lands on the guy's mission gate. No Halos, in a Slave clone... okay, set the scanner to boost sig radius and head in.

The guy is about 30 km from warp-in, but his packrat MTU is sitting 2300 meters from me. I set to work on nomming at it... about 30 seconds or so later I remember to set my drones on it. It's been a while :/ After another 20 seconds or so I get the carebear stare from him. Fine. Omar don't scare. Then I notice him drop a full flight of hob 2's who summarily target me. Wait, what? It's on!

Screw the MTU, I start a spiral approach and begin to madly target drones. I've got the shakes, it's been so long since something scary shot at me. The little bastards gave me a pretty heavy mauling and I'm starting to realize that Comet does not equal Ishkur. I get my **** under control and they start popping one by one, as do the hammerhead 2's that follow.

Once that's out of the way I've got him scrammed and have started to apply the itty bitty neut to him. In local I see 'Well played.' followed shortly by 'Ransom?'
Conflicted. I kinda want to do that, but it's been soooo long since I've had a battleship under my guns. I decline politely. He's remarkably understanding about it. Truth is I was still unsure as to whether I could break his tank.

After another minute or so of applied pressure it becomes pretty clear that he's going to go down. Due to him being so polite about the matter I suggest he start preparing to warp out. I'm already gonna jack his navy battleship with my frig, so I win regardless... right?

His armor is just about gone and all of a sudden he ejects and warps his capsule out. Dafuq? WAIT! I turn off my guns and reel in my drones. I eject and receive a stern warning that I cannot board the ship due to my weapons timer. **** me sideways. For the next 55 seconds I'm jamming on D-scan like a rat hitting the treat button in a lab. Finally I hop into his ride and warp to a station.

I dump the thing, grab a shuttle and warp back to the mission. He still hasn't returned, so I manage to reclaim my Comet and head off into the black.

A good morning. Long story short? Free navy battleship! \o/

-Omar

Come hell or high water, this sick world will know I was here.

Tengu Grib
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#1046 - 2015-08-01 14:48:36 UTC
Oh man! Best free ship I've taken from space was a malediction someone left abandoned at the sun. That's a sweet prize Omar. :D

Rabble Rabble Rabble

Praise James, Supreme Protector of High Sec.

Praxis Ginimic
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#1047 - 2015-08-01 17:49:57 UTC
Everyone loves a freepocalypse
Lord LazyGhost
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#1048 - 2015-08-01 19:49:09 UTC
Omar Alharazaad wrote:
So I got a little bored this morning and decided to see if I could stir up some trouble nearby. No other Devils online but a few PIRAT's active, so I headed the opposite direction.

I asked myself, 'self, what have you not done in a while?' the answer was of course obvious... I haven't flipped any missions in some time and faced with either a clone jump or 30 warps to minmatar space things were looking a bit bleak.

Screw it. I hopped over to Dresi with a Fed Navy Comet and set the scanning slave to work. A Navy Harby who just wouldn't bite. Fine. An Apocalypse who seemed to be jumping around just to **** me off. **** him. I went to Aphend.

Parked the scanning slave a distance off of the sun and set him to work. Hmm. Battleship? Alrighty. Wait, Navy Apocalypse? **** YEAH. Omar Warps in and lands on the guy's mission gate. No Halos, in a Slave clone... okay, set the scanner to boost sig radius and head in.

The guy is about 30 km from warp-in, but his packrat MTU is sitting 2300 meters from me. I set to work on nomming at it... about 30 seconds or so later I remember to set my drones on it. It's been a while :/ After another 20 seconds or so I get the carebear stare from him. Fine. Omar don't scare. Then I notice him drop a full flight of hob 2's who summarily target me. Wait, what? It's on!

Screw the MTU, I start a spiral approach and begin to madly target drones. I've got the shakes, it's been so long since something scary shot at me. The little bastards gave me a pretty heavy mauling and I'm starting to realize that Comet does not equal Ishkur. I get my **** under control and they start popping one by one, as do the hammerhead 2's that follow.

Once that's out of the way I've got him scrammed and have started to apply the itty bitty neut to him. In local I see 'Well played.' followed shortly by 'Ransom?'
Conflicted. I kinda want to do that, but it's been soooo long since I've had a battleship under my guns. I decline politely. He's remarkably understanding about it. Truth is I was still unsure as to whether I could break his tank.

After another minute or so of applied pressure it becomes pretty clear that he's going to go down. Due to him being so polite about the matter I suggest he start preparing to warp out. I'm already gonna jack his navy battleship with my frig, so I win regardless... right?

His armor is just about gone and all of a sudden he ejects and warps his capsule out. Dafuq? WAIT! I turn off my guns and reel in my drones. I eject and receive a stern warning that I cannot board the ship due to my weapons timer. **** me sideways. For the next 55 seconds I'm jamming on D-scan like a rat hitting the treat button in a lab. Finally I hop into his ride and warp to a station.

I dump the thing, grab a shuttle and warp back to the mission. He still hasn't returned, so I manage to reclaim my Comet and head off into the black.

A good morning. Long story short? Free navy battleship! \o/

-Omar


great mate well done. how was it fitted? pleae say shinny :)
Omar Alharazaad
New Eden Tech Support
#1049 - 2015-08-01 21:40:04 UTC  |  Edited by: Omar Alharazaad
T2 guns and cap rechargers, a pair of navy issue armor reppers and a trio of navy hardeners.
Fairly shiny, but he must have had some PG or CPU issues with his fit as there was an empty slow slot.

Edit: I just now looked in the cargo hold. Um, yeah. Five more navy hardeners sitting in there. A good haul.

Sometimes I'm impulsive, so I kind of stripped it before saving the fit.

Actually, if he'd stopped trying to fight back I'm thinkin he probably could have just blueballed me by focusing solely on repping my damage. I had limited ammo to work with. While it was technically possible to ferry more in, I've found that trying to catch that cargo container can sometimes lead to complications such as drifting out of point range or the enemy themselves actually scooping it up.

Come hell or high water, this sick world will know I was here.

Zappity
New Eden Tank Testing Services
#1050 - 2015-08-03 11:01:01 UTC  |  Edited by: Zappity
[Please forgive this atrocious piece of roleplay. It was amusing over a hefty glass of wine.]

Zappity > 50m and i will let you go
Zappity > this be a ransom demand, yarr
Worthy Adversary > yarr

(A highsec Raven had aggressed my humbled Ishkur while I was innocently pilfering loot from his mission wrecks.)

Zappity > do you decline?
Zappity > for i may be forced to bring in the Orca of Reshipping

(Actually, I must confess that this was all bluff. I have an Orca alt but she was on the other side of the map and I've never used her for highsec shenanigans.)

Worthy Adversary > well I dont know
Zappity > you have a hefty tank. methinks it be made of whale hide

(Translation: he had an active tank which I was barely scratching.)

Worthy Adversary > sort of fell for your trap didnt I
Zappity > that be so, matey
Worthy Adversary > you could just let me go
Zappity > yarr, but the act of deactivating yon warp scrambler is so tiring it deserves some pennies
Worthy Adversary > you dont want pennies
Zappity > i be awaitin' a counter offer

(His valiant alt arrived in a Kestrel. I stayed on the Raven and sent my drones after the Kestrel. He managed to escape deep in hull.)

Zappity > when will your parrot return? or was it a Kestrel?
Zappity > he be a fiesty specimen
Worthy Adversary > Kestrel but he wont be back
Zappity > ye showed some spirit so i am willing to lower my accustomed fee
Zappity > 10m and you're a'sailin free
Worthy Adversary > well thank you - to what
Worthy Adversary > 10 mil is fair
Worthy Adversary > how do I know you will leave me alone
Worthy Adversary > once I have paid
Zappity > you must trust me. but i be an honourable pirate, yarr
Worthy Adversary > lol

(Sigh. You lot make life so difficult sometimes.)

Zappity > my patience be wearing thin, ya briny barnacle
Zappity > the old Orca, she takes a while to align but helpful she surely is
Worthy Adversary > Yes I am sure
Zappity > and I sense ye are a'stallin, waiting for a fleet sailing in on the winds
Zappity > if it give thee comfort, I be a member of the Honourable Ransomers' Club: https://forums.eveonline.com/default.aspx?g=posts&m=3584534

(Whether this would have had any effect we shall never learn. At this moment his alt arrived again, this time in a Drake.)

Zappity > treachery!

(I had lost my Suspect flag and so sent the Drake a duel request. He had set it to auto-reject so I had to wait for him to summon up the courage.)

Zappity > yon Drake will need to send a duel request for i no longer be suspect
Worthy Adversary > yeah noticed
Zappity > i be willing to take on the two of ye
Zappity > foul play be damned!
Worthy Adversary > why dont I feel this is a good idea

(Ha! He aggressed! And didn’t take the chance to depart while I burned the ~30km from the Raven to the Drake. I knew I couldn’t break the Raven and wanted a crack at the battlecruiser.)

Worthy Adversary > still want 10 mil

(This came after I broke his shield. It was a passive regen tank and it was very close. I needed overheated guns to crack it and reached 80% heat before getting past peak regen.)

Zappity > ye had your chance, now thee walks the plank!
Worthy Adversary > fair enough
Zappity > gf, catch you around mate
Worthy Adversary > cu

Drake: http://eve.battleclinic.com/killboard/killmail.php?eid=48231467

Zappity's Adventures for a taste of lowsec and nullsec.

Armtoe
Arton Yachting and Angling Club
Domain Research and Mining Inst.
#1051 - 2015-08-04 15:32:37 UTC
Nothing major just a short funny story:

So last night, an alliance mate logs in one of his toons and realizes that there is a cyno up in his system. He undocks to see what is going on and sees an archon 50km off of the station. Apparently, the archon had cyno'd too close to the station and bounced real hard. So the alliance mate starts yelling on comms and everybody tells him to get tackle and light a cyno, but it turns out that the toon that was logged in did not have a cyno available, and his other account was not cooperating having crashed or something or other. So a toon is burned over to system from several jumps away to light the cyno, all the while our alliance mate is yelling that we need to get there quick as he is dying and wont be able to hold tackle for long.

The cyno toon gets to the targets as the alliance mate is in half armor, lights the cyno and blops flood in. As the target is being killed this convo happens in local:
Juan Thang > armtoe
Armtoe > o/
Juan Thang > you killed my first battleship, only fitting your on my first carrier loss
Armtoe > its the circle of life
Juan Thang > abbandon

Its funny, eve seems like such a big place, and yet, four years later on the other side of the universe, still killing all the same folk.
Omar Alharazaad
New Eden Tech Support
#1052 - 2015-08-05 15:05:08 UTC  |  Edited by: Omar Alharazaad
So a new war went live for us recently. This morning I logged on and was hoping for some fun that involved other people.
I got it.

Normally I'm the only or one of maybe two Devils on during my after work cool down time. Today was a little different.
Our CEO was happily doing locates and discovered a trio of war targets in the Josameto system. Devils being devils, those of us who were online, including our fearless leader started that way. As Ralph has pointed out in other threads, we do like to hunt targets when we can find them. After a dozen jumps or so we set ourselves up. Not a big bunch, just four of us with the three targets sitting adjacent.

After much scanning and skulking it seemed that all but one of our intended victims had docked up, with the exception of a Garmur who jumped into system with us... right on top of Wael in his Hecate.

The Hecate is a dead sexy ship, and I cannot wait to fly my own, I'll just take a moment to say.

The Garmur escapes Wael at the gate and warps to a nearby station... and sits there. Whut? Wael engages and finds out this little bastard packs a punch. It's faster than him and is seriously dishing out some punishment. The three of us who were enroute land and start burning towards it. Fortunately we were arriving from different locations, so it's orbit turns out to not be a magic bullet that wins all. After overheating EVERYTHING I manage to get within point range of it... and then web range. **** is on. Wael manages to disengage and limp his beleaguered Hecate back to the station... on fire (the best way to be when still alive).

I've got it webbed and have my drones out while dropping HAM justice on it from the heavens... granted, I was too drunk to remember to actually set my drones to attack. My Viking overlords are there as well, making it's short but interesting life more painful. Eventually, suddenly, it goes kaboom.

Thus is scored the first blood in a new war for us.
https://zkillboard.com/kill/48291885/

After docking up and repairing the several burnt out modules I am informed that my drones (you know, the ones I never told to do a damned thing) were still sitting in space. I mosey over and pick the little slackers up and then we begin our trek back to the homeland.

I know, it's just a frigate kill, but it was a fun hunt and dear lord the guy had that thing fit out shinier than any T2 cruiser I'd ever fly. A good morning indeed. I always enjoy getting a chance to fly with the other Devils. Teamwork for the win, as there's no way I could have caught this guy in my Sac. Without Wael's fast action on getting this guy pinned down and the coordinated efforts of Tearz and Raz this shiny little bastard would have been free to roam the spaceways in his blingy frig for who knows how long.

Come hell or high water, this sick world will know I was here.

Domino Vyse
FeedingMachine
War and Wormhole
#1053 - 2015-08-07 18:44:54 UTC
[this is copy pasted from my corp's forum so sorry if there are format issues]

So recently, I joined some renter alliance in null with the intention of taking all their stuff. I soon realised that the CEO is an actual ******** and managed to convince him to give me POS roles on day one. I waited until nobody was online, and I started to take down the pos, worth ~2billion. It takes 48 minutes to unanchor the tower, and the damn CEO logs in about 10 minutes into the cycle.

****.

I give him some bullshit about how it was an accident and he actually believes me, but he still took my POS manager roles, leaving my hangar access, however. I grab a 'ceptor and scoot over to their offices in hisec, looting 300mil from them.

And today, I am back in null and he hasnt noticed the hisec offices are empty. So I grab my Iteron and empty a further 200mil in ice from the POS. He still hasnt noticed. One of the other guys from the corp logs in, and starts to mine with his Skiff, with his boosting Orca on the edge of the POS.

I fit up my Ishtar for max DPS and speed and fly over to the POS. I start at 70km and approach the Orca at full speed, overheating the MWD for the big bump. Off he shoots a solid 10km from the edge of the POS shield. I land my scram and dual web- hes going nowhere. Bish bash bosh, Orca killmail. And as he was dying he jettisoned the Bustard from his Orca's cargo. So I killed that too.

Total loss including hangar loot 1.5bil.



UFS Fenix > No smug words domino? lol
Lightmar > he wasn't any good at pvp here anyway
Domino Vyse > gotta go afk a few
UFS Fenix > Na lol
UFS Fenix > Thats sad haha
Lightmar > I blocked him
Domino Vyse > hold off on the abuse for 1 sec, gotta run to the store
Domino Vyse > back
UFS Fenix > You better biomass your char lol.
UFS Fenix > Good luck joining anyone after this.
Domino Vyse > i got friends to go to :)
UFS Fenix > Alright I blocked him too.
UFS Fenix > Going back to what I was doing.
UFS Fenix > Hanger already restocked :)

*He then changes the MOTD of the channel*

Channel MOTD: Domino Vyse killed Francis orca today in SH. His roles have been removed he will be out of corp in 24 hours. Stay clear of him until then.

*I then ask him to not make a thread on the eve forums about it as it will hinder my chances of joining another corp. (this is of course bait, theres nothing funnier than getting your targets to cry publicly on the forums) He then tries to brag himself up, trying to make me jealous...*

*Helledro is his alt BTW*

Helledro > Making that thread now :)
Domino Vyse > lol we had a deal
Helledro > Thats cute
Helledro > If you contract me the stuff back I wont.
Helledro > but I doubt you will :)
Domino Vyse > sorry but I cannot do that
Helledro > Okay
Helledro > No big deal, your the 3rd Awoxer/ Corp thief in 8 Years of the corp being around.
Domino Vyse > thats good going
Helledro > The hangers were set up so our loss is only 5% of total assets.
Helledro > I learned after the first time :)
Domino Vyse > Eve is all about learning :)
Helledro > Time to go ratting
Domino Vyse > heh you didnt make the thread, nice
Helledro > I still will
Domino Vyse > ...
Helledro > and il make sure to convo any corp you join
Helledro > One of the old corp thiefs I still convo people he joins till this day and its been a year lol
Helledro > got him booted from 6 corps so far.
Helledro > woot woot
Domino Vyse > thats persistent
Helledro > Na its easy
Helledro > okay back to ratting
Helledro > sweet domination spawn
Helledro > The funny part is we will make the isk back in 2 to 3 days or less.
Helledro > Also I have 2 corporations joining us :)
Domino Vyse > I'm happy for you, it was never personal
Helledro > I could care less about the loss, its just unfortunate that you went this route.. as there is plenty of pvp every day.
Helledro > Well unless you join your "friends" il make sure you never join a corp again :)
Domino Vyse > you're lucky you logged in as I was taking down your POS
Helledro > Yea
Helledro > Killed your roles after that
Domino Vyse > yeah
Helledro > So I assume this is your alt right?
Domino Vyse > nope
Helledro > you cant be dumb enough to use your main for this crap
Helledro > wow then you are dumb
Domino Vyse > i dont like alts
Helledro > Yea your character is done then
Helledro > Might want to put it up on the bazar and start training a new one.
Domino Vyse > il just join a corp I used to be in and rob them too
Helledro > Il contact them right away
Helledro > Im retired at 26 bro..
Helledro > have nothing else to do but play eve lol
Domino Vyse > cool
Helledro > Yup
Helledro > Make 300,000$ a year.
Helledro > Buying 50 acres of land for my self next week in Chile :)
Domino Vyse > I can see you have taken this personally
Helledro > Me na?
Helledro > I got robbed for 10 billion once
Domino Vyse > then why bring up your income?
Helledro > idk for fun?
Domino Vyse > or maybe you clean toilets and aren't happy about it
Helledro > After the 10 billion loss I restructured the corp hangers..
Helledro > Nope, I own 3 houses.. people clean my toilets
Helledro > lol
Domino Vyse > Its funny how people lie on the internet
Helledro > haha I dont care if you believe me.
Helledro > So what do you do?
Helledro > Live in the collapsing UK?
Domino Vyse > I am a portrait artist from France
Helledro > Ah france, socialist nightmare of the world.
Domino Vyse > I have painted alot of celebrities actually
Helledro > I hate art, and celeberities too
Helledro > Your married right?

.....
Domino Vyse
FeedingMachine
War and Wormhole
#1054 - 2015-08-07 18:45:56 UTC
....

Domino Vyse > You dont hate art, you just dont understand art
Helledro > I hate art
Helledro > Well I dont hate it... I have some at my house I inherited.. but I would never waste my money on it.
Domino Vyse > and not stupid celebrities like paris Hilton
Helledro > Gardeing is my alt.
Helledro > Gardening*
Helledro > Art*
Helledro > All celebrities are pretty much stupid.
Helledro > Only the sheep of the world follow them.
Domino Vyse > You clearly havent heard of Sem Skord or Miura Bull
Helledro > Nope, and im glad.
Domino Vyse > I got 25k$ for each of their portraits
Helledro > About as much as I made buying depressed homes in Athens lol
Helledro > Ah greece.. if it wasnt for those morons I would have less money.
Helledro > Well its been fun, but your boring me now with your art.
Helledro > o/
Domino Vyse > o/
Helledro > Il make sure to eve mail you a link to your forum post.
Domino Vyse > dunno why i trusted you lol
Helledro > same reason I trusted you.. human nature.
Helledro > the difference is a 500mil + orca loss VS not being able to use your character for anything meaningful
Helledro > I say I win :)
Helledro > o/
Domino Vyse > o/

*Hope you enjoyed my story, cos I sure enjoyed doing it xD and I'm not a portrait artist from France BTW*
Freya Sertan
Doomheim
#1055 - 2015-08-07 18:50:24 UTC
Helledro > I hate art, and celeberities too
Helledro > Your married right?

ERMAHGERD CELEBERITIES

Hahahahahaha, well we know he isn't.

New Eden isn't nice. It isn't friendly. It isn't very hospitiable. Good thing there are people here to shoot in the face.

Want to make New Eden a nice place? Try this out.

Mag's
Azn Empire
#1056 - 2015-08-07 19:16:01 UTC
Oh he's retired and rich IRL. So this whole time he didn't really care and that was his way of telling you that.

Me thinks Helledro doth protest too much. Lol

Destination SkillQueue:- It's like assuming the Lions will ignore you in the Savannah, if you're small, fat and look helpless.

Darth Terona
Horde Vanguard.
Pandemic Horde
#1057 - 2015-08-07 19:58:23 UTC
:) too much attention Dom. I'll have to adjust my methods lol. <3
Noragen Neirfallas
Emotional Net Loss
#1058 - 2015-08-07 21:14:00 UTC
We were promised a forum post...

Ps I am also a wealthy Greek landowner

Member and Judge of the Court of Crime and Punishment

Noragens basically the Chribba of C&P - Zimmy Zeta

Confirming that we all play in Noragen's eve. - BeBopAReBop

ISD Buldath favorite ISD

'"****station games" - Sun Tzu' - Ralph King Griffin

Domino Vyse
FeedingMachine
War and Wormhole
#1059 - 2015-08-07 21:19:28 UTC
Noragen Neirfallas wrote:
We were promised a forum post...


...and we've got one :)
Moon Moon Burdy
New Eden Tech Support
#1060 - 2015-09-03 21:49:43 UTC
Yesterday morning Stella attacked a retreiver in her catalyst. She didn't seal the deal and CONCORD slapped her hand. (having trouble linking the killmail)

However, this morning she was convoed thusly:

[17:32:24] Stella Burdy > morning!
[17:32:39] xjettx > you tried to gank one of my corp members yesterday is there a problem?
[17:32:52] Stella Burdy > oh no! no problem!
[17:33:06] xjettx > what was the reason might i ask
[17:33:09] Stella Burdy > Had a catalyst, wanted to see if I coul take out a retreiver.... turns out I could not :D
[17:33:20] xjettx > not a good way to make friends
[17:33:24] Stella Burdy > baptism by CONCORD, as it were
[17:33:38] xjettx > new player?
[17:34:04] Stella Burdy > pretty new, yeah
[17:34:38] xjettx > be careful who you gank, if it had been one of the alliance members we are soon joining the would war deck you and keep you docked indefinatly, they live for PVP
[17:35:21] xjettx > so should i tell my guys you are not a threat?
[17:35:23] Stella Burdy > oh cool! I also live for pvp. Grante I'm not very good, but that wiull come with time, I'm sure. This is a pvp game after all.. or so I was led to believe.
[17:35:32] Stella Burdy > Yeah, i'm definitely not a threat
[17:35:45] Stella Burdy > Even kittens mock me
[17:36:23] xjettx > ok because if we have to have this convo again from one of my mebers getting attacked ill hire a mercenary corp to take you out :) if you want friends we can do that too
[17:37:06] Stella Burdy > If you would like a referral, i know a few merc corps that are quite excellent.
[17:37:35] xjettx > were not going to have this convo again right? we can be friendly but not if you open fire
[17:38:13] xjettx > were a player friednly coporation helping each other
[17:39:36] xjettx > ?
[17:39:37] Stella Burdy > That sounds great! I would like to point out that no mining ships were harmed in yesterday's exercise.
[17:40:26] xjettx > i understand and appreciate you taking the time to talk to me. ill let my guys know youll be standing down and will no longer be a problem
[17:41:20] Stella Burdy > Wonderful. I wish you and yours a fruitful and joyous day.

Surely this heralds the beginning of a long and lasting friendship!!

Things that went boom

Storytime with Moon Moon New stories semi frequently-ish!

Promising Young Murderer, Education Appreciated.