Intergalactic Summit

Gutter Press has recently learned that a Holder in Kador region has proposed a solution to the Minmatar Question.

The Answer, according to the Holder, is to replace all Minmatar slaves in the Empire, with Ealurians.

"I have been studying this problem for some decades, and the answer recently came to me. If we stop breeding new Minmatar, and instead, increase Ealurian breeding, then, well, the problem solves itself in a century or so.", said the Holder, a planetary Lady in the Parrosa constellation.

"I have been training Ealurians for some time, and they have proven adept at all tasks I have given them, even complex engineering and administrative roles, such as maintaining my Holdings shipping fleet, or managing the accounts. This shows they can take over all roles for which the Empire employs Minmatar."

This proposal has met with criticism from other Holders, and Imperial officials.

"Ealurians ? I find it hard to believe that they can be trained to operate a starship", said a retired Navy officer.

"And what of the Reclaiming ? And the cultivation of the souls of the Minmatar ? Are we to just abandon them to the Deceiver ?", asked a priest.

"Oh, I find the Ealurians quite agreeable. They have such adorable curly hair", said one Holder Lady.

"Well, it would be nice to end the Minmatar menace once and for all, but that is hardly the way to do it", said another Holder Lord.



With this amount of argument, it seems that Answers to the Minmatar Question remain elusive.


Gutter Press. News.

Sterilizing half of your population does not seem like a very smart idea.

Um. While I've been living here (and admittedly I haven't been staying with the most orthodox Amarr, lately), I really haven't even heard a "Minmatar problem" mentioned.

At all.

About the only person (I've run into) who really seems to think there is one is Nauplius, and he's agreed to be off his head.

The amount of ignorance and injustice in such a short phrase irks me.

This Lady Holder is on the right track, but God would be glorified in a slightly different take, one that I have expressed several times — blood sacrifice of the Minmatar slave population offset by increased breeding of the non-Minmatar slave population.

So, the Holder masses in the Empire begin to see their Minmatar slave stock as a "problem" to be solved.

About a hundred years, one rebellion, couple wars, one Elder Fleet invasion and one Imperial 9th gen emancipation decree late, but still, it's heartwarming news that they can think at all.

The result of that thinking is, of course, as messy as it should be expected.

You folks seem to forget that this is the Gutter Press.

Gutter. Press.

Gutter Press.

I mean, come on! It's right there in the name!

Also, it's been known to cover actual news.

... possibly by mistake?

Now, if there would be a way to solve Gallente problem just by breeding something...
But alas, gallentes with their lack of morals would interbreed anything bred to replace them, turning them again into gallenteans again. They are like cancer!

Hmm . . . Interbreeding with something bred to replace me. I can think of far worse ways to spend an evening.