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Crime & Punishment

 
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Creative smack lines
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Chenguang Hucel-Ge
Garoun Investment Bank
Gallente Federation
#1 - 2015-03-13 22:52:43 UTC  |  Edited by: Chenguang Hucel-Ge
Yep. Sometimes you get something other than recommendation of copulating with your own body, leaving territory at once, pointing out your terminal dislike of being on receiving end or some stupid projection of past self from them on you.
I believe you remember these lines or saved them.
I believe you can share this kind of stuff.


"Now I know why your parents are alcoholics"
"Your brain is the same as azn freckles - nonexistent"
Paranoid Loyd
#2 - 2015-03-13 22:58:45 UTC  |  Edited by: Paranoid Loyd
It was most eloquently put in one of the first convos I had in local about it:
Quote:
"The real threats out there don't have to promise retribution or talk ****, they just bring it.

"There is only one authority in this game, and that my friend is violence. The supreme authority upon which all other authority is derived." ISD Max Trix

Fix the Prospect!
Paranoid Loyd
#3 - 2015-03-13 23:19:27 UTC
Here are some of the choice excerpts of my recent eve-mails:

Quote:
my little friend ..... I hope your family, too, will die in a car crash) with love)) live on, feel real pain)) it's so nice


Quote:
There once was a feller called Loyd,
Who'd rather play spaceships with boys,
Instead of the deed,
He'd play till he pee'd,
And not wreck his bed with some noise!

You need a punch in teh faaAAAaaace!


Quote:
A suicide Ganker what a *anker.

Paranoid Loyed is a tool plays the game like a fool.


Quote:
Sometimes, i like to lube myself up with caldari premium, then roll around in isk, playing with my nipples. just wanted you to know that.

with love,

~ xxxxxx


Quote:
After some extensive research, we virtually engineered your girlfriend so that we can see what you have to look forward to when you go to bed. She's banging bro.

If you weren't a lying, 170 lb piece of fat, that was.

Thanks for the laughs, we haven't had this much fun in a good while. It's too bad that the closest you have to a girlfriend right now is either made of plastic, or your own right hand."


"There is only one authority in this game, and that my friend is violence. The supreme authority upon which all other authority is derived." ISD Max Trix

Fix the Prospect!
Ned Thomas
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#4 - 2015-03-13 23:48:52 UTC
Took a war fleet down to try and catch a WT, this convo happened in local:

Quote:

CEO: Holy local spike, Batman
WT: Oh hello! Welcome to our lovely syatem. Can I get you anything?
Corpmate 1: Only thing I want in here is you
WT: That's sweet, but I'm not into guys
Corpmate 1: Who said I'm a guy?
CEO: Corpmate 1 is a dude?


The last two lines were posted at practically the same time. Dunno if that counts as smack, but it made me chuckle.

Meanwhile, one of my more recent war fleets with Signal produced this line:

Quote:

WT: I got kills
Corpmate: We got snowballs


Space pacifists ftw
Mike Adoulin
Happys Happy Hamster Hunting Club
#5 - 2015-03-14 08:31:42 UTC
Hmmm.

The one that made my black heart fill with glee was when a former WT and current gank victim (to the tune of 1.6 billion ISKies..heheh...) cried out in local.......

"You'll pay for this, Mike Adoulin!!!"


He then proceeded to cuss me out in Spanish.

It was truly glorious.

Cool

Everything in EVE is a trap.

And if it isn't, it's your job to make it a trap...:)

You want to know what immorality in EVE Online looks like? Look no further than Ripard "Jester" Teg.

Chribba is the Chuck Norris of EVE.
Ralph King-Griffin
New Eden Tech Support
#6 - 2015-03-14 18:43:48 UTC
when you kill someone's pimped out battleship with a frigate solo they tend not to have much to say afterwards sadly.

some of them laugh it off though which is nice

Murderers of Negotiable Motivations

=]|[=
Hannibal Carlisle
Relapse Anonymous
Sedition.
#7 - 2015-03-15 00:48:52 UTC
This convo still makes me smile.


Miner> u gonna pay for that
Miner> ?
Hannibal Carlisle > You sir, broke my catalyst.
Hannibal Carlisle > I demand of you 10mil isk
Miner> how about you replace my covetor
Miner> seeing as how your delivery was so sloppy
Hannibal Carlisle > Miner calm down.
Miner > woah racist
Hannibal Carlisle > You broke my catalyst, and warped away denying me your pod. You now owe me 20 million.
Miner > what kind of rat are you
Miner> are you a big man
Hannibal Carlisle > A pi-rat
Hannibal Carlisle > hehe, get it? Pirate? Pi-rat?
Miner > congrats with your twisted fantasy
Hannibal Carlisle > No, no fantasy. In Eve online I am a space pirate.
Yang Aurilen
State War Academy
Caldari State
#8 - 2015-03-16 01:20:55 UTC
The best smack talk is gf's in local after you loot his wreck. No other way around it. Alternatively laugh at him in local if you're being bad.

Post with your NPC alt main and not your main main alt!
Desudes
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#9 - 2015-03-16 01:26:59 UTC
http://i.imgur.com/H6kieM9.gif and http://i.imgur.com/GCWDAP8.jpg

Excuse me, but what the f*ck are you desu?