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Stormcrows Tea Parties for hire
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Darina Rea
Sovereign Hospitaller Order of Saint Katherine
#1 - 2014-09-03 21:46:25 UTC
On behalf of the Stormcrows Mercenary Corporation (here after called Stormcrows),

I am allowed and honoured to make the following statement:

The Stormcrows are extending their field of operation and offering their services in more matters then just your average mercenary corporation. Always active to distinguish themselves through various interesting means, the members have decided to engage into an entirely new field of demand.

Tea parties.

Prices are negotiable with members of the corporation.

Satisfaction guaranteed. *





*Terms and conditions may apply **

** Uponn signs of dissatisfaction, the Stormcrows hold a wardeclaration in reserve on a random member of the tea party.
** Same goes for when lousy tips happen
** Whining about the temperature of the tea is strictly forbidden
** Stormcrows Tea Parties are a completely honest means of making ISK
** I can't think up any more of these
** This blindingly great offer is in no way connected to either myself or SHOSK!
Erin Savonarola
Doomheim
#2 - 2014-09-03 22:01:31 UTC
Making light of uncouth and base behaviour does not do you credit, sister.
Makoto Priano
Kirkinen-Arataka Transhuman Zenith Consulting Ltd.
Arataka Research Consortium
#3 - 2014-09-03 23:00:08 UTC
With all due respect: what in Maker's name?

Itsukame-Zainou Hyperspatial Inquiries: exploring the edge of the known, advancing the state of the art. Would you like to know more?
DeadRow
Blue Canary
Watch This
#4 - 2014-09-03 23:33:24 UTC
Judging by the two replies, capsuleers are both disgusted and confused by tea parties!

~Hikari
Claudia Osyn
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#5 - 2014-09-04 01:35:58 UTC
Recommend inviting Kimmy. She sounds like the tea type.

A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.
Makoto Priano
Kirkinen-Arataka Transhuman Zenith Consulting Ltd.
Arataka Research Consortium
#6 - 2014-09-04 05:38:22 UTC
I'm just uncertain of their military applications. I mean, I understand that a solid tea set can be a force multiplier, but...?

Itsukame-Zainou Hyperspatial Inquiries: exploring the edge of the known, advancing the state of the art. Would you like to know more?
Elmund Egivand
Tribal Liberation Force
Minmatar Republic
#7 - 2014-09-04 05:53:16 UTC
Makoto Priano wrote:
I'm just uncertain of their military applications. I mean, I understand that a solid tea set can be a force multiplier, but...?


I heard stories of boilers and tea sets in pre-capsuleer era starships. They are in the Bridge, the Engineering,, the Propulsions and also Gunnery. I think it's a Gallente thing.

A Minmatar warship is like a rusting Beetle with 500 horsepower Cardillac engines in the rear, armour plating bolted to chassis and a M2 Browning stuck on top.
Desiderya
Blue Canary
Watch This
#8 - 2014-09-04 11:20:45 UTC
What's the fuzz?
Sometimes you got to be convincing to make someone drink the tea as it is prepared.

Ruthlessness is the kindness of the wise.
Claudia Osyn
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#9 - 2014-09-04 15:41:46 UTC
Elmund Egivand wrote:
Makoto Priano wrote:
I'm just uncertain of their military applications. I mean, I understand that a solid tea set can be a force multiplier, but...?


I heard stories of boilers and tea sets in pre-capsuleer era starships. They are in the Bridge, the Engineering,, the Propulsions and also Gunnery. I think it's a Gallente thing.

Actually it's more a Caldari thing I think. Gallente have coffee and Quafe.

A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.
Jinari Otsito
Otsito Mining and Manufacture
#10 - 2014-09-04 16:07:29 UTC
I don't get it.

Prime Node. Ask me about augmentation.
Darina Rea
Sovereign Hospitaller Order of Saint Katherine
#11 - 2014-09-04 17:10:00 UTC
Jinari Otsito wrote:
I don't get it.


A tea party is a traditional ceremony in the State, usually denoting a social gathering through a fixed schedule, number of participants and dress code. A very formal gathering, if you will.

If I'd have to compare it to something, it could come close to an Amarrian Court ball, a Tribal gathering of Elders or a Formal Federal dinner.

This is not to be confused with a Tea Maker ceremony, which is a completely different thing with utterly different meaning!

I hope this helps?
Lunarisse Aspenstar
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
Khimi Harar
#12 - 2014-09-04 17:25:40 UTC
Tea Maker ceremony?

*gives Sister Darina a curious look*
Jinari Otsito
Otsito Mining and Manufacture
#13 - 2014-09-04 17:54:25 UTC
I am quite familiar with tea parties. I just don't get what the joke is supposed to be.

Prime Node. Ask me about augmentation.
Darsena Izuma
Garoun Investment Bank
Gallente Federation
#14 - 2014-09-04 18:12:54 UTC
I had just prepared a pot of tea, poured myself a cup, and was letting it cool for a moment when I sat down to read this message.

I am not quite certain that I am thirsty anymore.

Fedo are not what they seem to be.  Welcome to Night Vale.
Elmund Egivand
Tribal Liberation Force
Minmatar Republic
#15 - 2014-09-05 01:09:36 UTC
Darina Rea wrote:
Jinari Otsito wrote:
I don't get it.


A tea party is a traditional ceremony in the State, usually denoting a social gathering through a fixed schedule, number of participants and dress code. A very formal gathering, if you will.

If I'd have to compare it to something, it could come close to an Amarrian Court ball, a Tribal gathering of Elders or a Formal Federal dinner.

This is not to be confused with a Tea Maker ceremony, which is a completely different thing with utterly different meaning!

I hope this helps?


So in the past the Caldari used to stop doing everything, boil the kettle and bring out the scones whenever the clock strikes 4?

A Minmatar warship is like a rusting Beetle with 500 horsepower Cardillac engines in the rear, armour plating bolted to chassis and a M2 Browning stuck on top.
Makoto Priano
Kirkinen-Arataka Transhuman Zenith Consulting Ltd.
Arataka Research Consortium
#16 - 2014-09-05 01:10:16 UTC
Clearly, Ms. Izuma, tonight is a brandy night.

Itsukame-Zainou Hyperspatial Inquiries: exploring the edge of the known, advancing the state of the art. Would you like to know more?
Elmund Egivand
Tribal Liberation Force
Minmatar Republic
#17 - 2014-09-05 01:39:32 UTC  |  Edited by: Elmund Egivand
Claudia Osyn wrote:
Elmund Egivand wrote:
Makoto Priano wrote:
I'm just uncertain of their military applications. I mean, I understand that a solid tea set can be a force multiplier, but...?


I heard stories of boilers and tea sets in pre-capsuleer era starships. They are in the Bridge, the Engineering,, the Propulsions and also Gunnery. I think it's a Gallente thing.

Actually it's more a Caldari thing I think. Gallente have coffee and Quafe.


I as a Matari am insulted that you insinuated that coffee is a Gallente tradition. We found the darn things first on Pator! We started the idea of growing more coffee in plantations! And drinking it ceremoniously!

Also, I think I misplaced my RMS-issued coffee flask. That or I improvised it into a mine when I was half-asleep.

A Minmatar warship is like a rusting Beetle with 500 horsepower Cardillac engines in the rear, armour plating bolted to chassis and a M2 Browning stuck on top.
Darsena Izuma
Garoun Investment Bank
Gallente Federation
#18 - 2014-09-05 13:43:29 UTC
I've never heard of coffee being drunk in a ceremonial fashion. I must admit that I cannot abide the taste of that foul bean. Perhaps there are different varieties grown in your fine Republic that are of better quality. The idea of coffee being drunk reverently, or contemplatively, is fascinating. I must look more deeply into this.

Here in the Federation, it seems to be treated as nothing more than some energy drink that is gulped down before it has even cooled without a second thought. Honestly, they don't treat the drinking of tea any more respectfully, and my upbringing bristles at it. I love my Gallente friends from outside of the Jin-Mei dearly, but they sometimes exasperate me. I have tried, without much success, to share the more refined pleasures of tea, properly prepared and enjoyed slowly in a relaxed atmosphere, with them, but they never seem to have the time to set aside an hour or two to sit and merely enjoy the taste and aroma of a finely brewed cup, with friends and some light music and conversation. I suppose it's faster to just hurl some water through a filter and gulp it down, if a caffeine burst is all one is after, but the day I fail to set aside some time after lunch with some tea and a lovely starcake and just enjoy myself is the day I've died. Even my crew understands this, and I am quite strict about enforcing tea-time, even when we're in deep space.

Fedo are not what they seem to be.  Welcome to Night Vale.
Claudia Osyn
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#19 - 2014-09-05 16:31:26 UTC
Darsena Izuma wrote:
I've never heard of coffee being drunk in a ceremonial fashion. I must admit that I cannot abide the taste of that foul bean. Perhaps there are different varieties grown in your fine Republic that are of better quality. The idea of coffee being drunk reverently, or contemplatively, is fascinating. I must look more deeply into this.

Here in the Federation, it seems to be treated as nothing more than some energy drink that is gulped down before it has even cooled without a second thought. Honestly, they don't treat the drinking of tea any more respectfully, and my upbringing bristles at it. I love my Gallente friends from outside of the Jin-Mei dearly, but they sometimes exasperate me. I have tried, without much success, to share the more refined pleasures of tea, properly prepared and enjoyed slowly in a relaxed atmosphere, with them, but they never seem to have the time to set aside an hour or two to sit and merely enjoy the taste and aroma of a finely brewed cup, with friends and some light music and conversation. I suppose it's faster to just hurl some water through a filter and gulp it down, if a caffeine burst is all one is after, but the day I fail to set aside some time after lunch with some tea and a lovely starcake and just enjoy myself is the day I've died. Even my crew understands this, and I am quite strict about enforcing tea-time, even when we're in deep space.

I drink coffee with much reverence. Although I must admit, I tend to dispense of the coffee mug and drink straight from the carafe on days that promise to be long....

A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.
Jinari Otsito
Otsito Mining and Manufacture
#20 - 2014-09-05 16:51:28 UTC
A Sebbie engineer I worked with brought me to the coffee fold. The ritual involved in a good mug of coffee brewed on an improvised device that may or may not set of IED detectors impressed me enough to try. I must say, it wasn't to my tastes to start with but I've grown fond of it over time. The subtleties in good coffee is remarkable, particularly when you get rid of the terrible "dark roast" stuff that just burns the actual coffee flavors out and replaces it with bitter burnt flavors.

It brings me quite a bit of pleasure to go through the rituals of grinding reasonably fresh roasted beans, ensuring the right coarseness of the grind, getting the temperature and fill just right, timing the soak perfectly before transferring it to a thermos that has been heated just right. Especially after a long day, where I can afterwards just sit back and focus on the aromas, identifying the blend of beans from the flavor and let the rest of New Eden just disappear from existence.

Of course, some heretics will put milk and stuff in it but then some people will also **** in holy water just for the hell of it.

Prime Node. Ask me about augmentation.
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