Crime & Punishment

There once was a pilot named Kris,
A transsexual who likes to drink **** <<-- [P word describing urine],
With GankMoa on gate,
Slowboats meet their fate,
He copulates with them, then blows them a kiss.

The List

I read of this game with its awards and claim to fame
The account is made with a character looking dapper
The help channels are beaming with great advice
I begin to explore system to system taking in the sights
But here is a new message before I can enter, is this uncharted territory?
Have I discovered something new? I proceed with angst
On the other side is you, my ship is destroyed you laugh in local about my poor fit
When asked why you claimed I deserved it.
That day you went on The List.

Two years to the later with skills to pilot a mighty ship
I have discovered your new Alliance, I am welcomed in it not remembering our past
Trust is gained I move through leadership until that day you lost all of it
At first login you notice the wallet is empty as you panic to check your hangers like a thief in the night I took all of it
When asked why I reminded you of our past when that week old toon was destroyed with haste I respond "you deserved it"
All your pos's are gone your sov bills unpaid, just like my shiny new ship everything you owned was taken for it

You were the first one on and now the first one off, but need I remind you I still have a list
Revenge is sweet, crippling your foes is sweeter but remember before shooting that new bro he may come to haunt
At a date much later.

The List

There's a carebear
In our Frigidaire--
He hates it 'cause it's cold in there.
With his seat in the meat
And his face in the fish
And his big hairy paws
In the buttery dish,
He's pondering ship loss
Was botting like a boss
Until we stuffed him in there,
Preserve with formaldehyde some do
But Avery mayonnaise prefers do
To prevent rotting corpse smelling like pooh,
That carebear
In our Fridgitydaire.

No need to be jammed
How cowardish to survive.
Later they return.

Last night there was a helios that jumped in our hole
Scanning for a high sec was probably his goal
He found a way out
That was camped by our scout
There was a price for entering: his corpse was the toll

Not about a specific gank but I like to throw it in local every now and then:

Thou barges better tanked they be, for when comes the ganking spree!


Such eloquence, such wisdom in so little words.