Alliance & Corporation Recruitment Center

Man i hate the EVE recruitment pages. I Hate them so much.... but here i am, looking for new players to EVE.....



Look at all those desperate people trying to scrape themselves a player or two. The worst part is that im in that same sad category of people now. But still i loathe them.



I hope you are not expecting a formal friendly post, where all the stuff is neatly listed up on what we can offer you, truth is that any corp can offer all the same damn things. PvP, PvE, SOV, Low sec PvP, learning the game, giving out ships for new players to use so that they don't quit the game as fast due to corp leadership lack of interest to make content for their player base.



If you have read this far, then its likely you really are looking for a corp. Does it make you sad that you are looking for 'friends' in this game? People to fly with? There is nothing wrong with a little bit of human contact, we all crave it now and then. but this is as good as it gets for you. Your contact is the last bit of feelings you manage to rustle up from your sad life which you have degraded with online p0rn and other depraved activities you only find on the internet. Just give up and join us, we understand your life, and we will give you our ears until that day come where you never log on ever again. And we will throw you out of corp, cause you are of no use to us anymore, just like trash.



Are you a totally new player? I hope you brought with you some Vaseline, cause most of the players in this game want to find you, mount you and go in dry. But if you join us, we can spare you that pain after we have hit you into submission. Cant have new players be too cocky. Hell, we will teach you how to earn money, so you can get your very own PvP ship. Just don't come crying when you have lost it. We will hit you some more. Maybe you will leave us, but you will come crawling back, just like all the other people that gets hit in a relationship. "He isnt like that" and "He is having a hard time" Oh yes! Tell yourself that when you come back into our fold. Its gonna be alright this time around.

If you have read this far, you truly should either quit this game, exercise and get a life, or just give into the realization that you are a beta person and will need us to fill your life with meaning, however hollow it might be.

-Count

Contacts:

Count Austheim
Ghosl Cadelanne
RisingFrost

Public Chat: Raven's Flight Public

Full API on joining to vet you, you can delete the API afterwards, if you dont like it, cry into a mail so i can forward it to the rest of the rejects i fly with.

Bump, why i have no idea. Its not like ads work.

Bump Meister

Best. Post. Ever!

Bampalicious

well...i am only 1-2days old. loving this game and i have played lots of skilled based games like this on the internet so im kinda just falling into it naturally. i play SWTOR when i can afford to play such a crap game^^ so i understand having tank is more important then DPS...i will be sticking to Amarr class ships because well duh thats where i started and i would like to see how much SP i can pump out in the first month...YES THE ONLY REASON I AM PLAYING IS BECAUSE OF BLACK FRIDAY SPECIAL!! no trial here :P i will be resubbing if i knew this game was this interesting i would have been playing 3 years ago xD ******* fail i know.

Currently 1-2days old with lvl 2 mastery on my Punisher...plan on using this ****** until i get some core skills up. this ship mastery thing is probably the only reason i havent quit this game yet^^ i would be so damn lost without it.

oh yea...IM A GUY! i did my homework before creating a character or toon or whatever you ******* call it. i noticed amarr has armor tank and requires little to no ammo...so SCORE THERE! but...the Amarr men look old as **** and i didnt want to look at an old dude in the portrait all day.....AND SHE GOTS SOME TIG OL BITTIES!!!

but i need advice and **** about PvP. im a stat whore in other games and i am kinda pissed if the ship i lost, doing the starter advanced military agent that had me fly my ship with explosives and blow it up, shows on my stats somewhere -.- ******* bastard.

anyways look me up in game...loved the post was some funny ****.

OMG I read your Blog and almost peed myself of how hard I was laughing!!!

Im still doing this it seems.

Bump for one of the best Corperations in EVE^^

Stil love u dudes!

Corp is now open to you. Who are you? Nobody cares, just join and shut up.