Out of Pod Experience

Damn, that article is so spot on that it almost hurts.

Nothing, I was just commenting on the article

well duh, of course there is. except when there isn't...

...in which case you can just create a reason, or start a fight whatever it takes to reconcile your conscience with your desires.

and let's not forget how mom always said there will always be someone out there who is smarter, stronger, more handsome, wealthier...

can we be honest here and just admit that sometimes there is no reason and it's just time to try someone else/you and i both know being perfect is not a guarantee of anything. you're implying that being perfect is a solution, but it's not.

the bright side is we're new and interesting to far more people than the few we're familiar to.

of course, the other side to that is commitment. i'm just not ready, and I don't know if I ever will be. but those of us who aren't should be honest with ourselves, don't you think

'stay in love with one person forever' is the politically correct answer we come up with using our thinking organ.

but the reality is ....

just read My Secret Garden (Nancy Friday)

it's about women's secret fantasies but the significance is the women who have them, and that it was released 25 years ago.

it's a book that will open your mind to 'oh wow you mean to tell me i'm not the only freak in this world?'

me too! the e-book version, anyway

well, i guess that's kind of obvious maybe. since i mentioned it.

have you tried starting by just saying hey hi.. you're cute. nothing wrong with that, and depending on their reaction you can proceed or move on. their reaction to a compliment is a great feeler. know what I'm saying? don't bother unless they're kind & receptive to a compliment. you'll come across some hueg betches, and they're just black holes of self esteem.

better yet, just do it with a wave and a smile. mouth "hi" I was just thinking to myself, 'what if she's in a group' and you know, she could get caught up in worrying what people around her would think. maybe pull her away with a head tilt like 'come here' or 'over there'

don't expect it to always work, just wait for when it does.

you're reallly going to need to make sure your outfit is easily recognizable as mainstream and possibly preppy. and no facial hair. make sure your hair is cut. and smile. (if you can't smile that means maybe you're not in the zone and 'shouldn't be doing this right now')

yes khaki and polo... my favorite pair of shoes are http://shop.lacoste.com/Lacoste-Mens-Taloire-15-Sneaker/dp/B00HG0Y14I

a watch that is not childish or too adult or too gaudy... it can be tricky. my favorite watch is something like this http://shop.lacoste.com/Lacoste-Mens-Seattle/dp/B00BBQFR3W (the one I have is a cloth band, with a green center)

"hi" is too formal sometimes, I usually go with "hey~"

I've read anonymous gripes from women on the internet that they hate "hey" but I think they are the minority. hey is playful

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something i realized a long time ago: 90% of it is simply being the one who is proposing to hang out or do whatever. like, if no other guy is talking with them at the time, as long as a guy has good hygiene, he could be short, overweight, whatever... the important part is being a guy who says something

and i've said some -crazy- things. they could've come from anybody and still worked. ("hey let's go make a movie." not right off the bat. this was after first establishing the chase)

in short: no. it's not about what you like, it's about what works. i suppose i could have said I learned to like certain styles and trends for their social acceptability. wearing things you like is not -bad- but the goal is maintaining an appearance that gets by their "hold up, what is that all about" filter. by dressing like people they know/are aware of/accept, you are associated with someone familiar

sometimes i wear a button-down with khakis and a fleece jacket (happens to be north face), to take on the appearance of someone older. reminding someone of their dad is not a bad thing, as long as you're more interesting and don't tell the same five puns on a monthly rotation

I'm not writing this to be mean, I'm writing it to reinforce a point: you can wear stuff like leather bracelets, but you'll have the same results that caused you to start this thread.

those boots look odd to me, but I don't find myself walkiing in snow or cold weather in Los Angeles. those boots remind me of Kanye, or timbaland. they are very hip hop in LA.as for the watch it's very... uptight.

I recommend something casual, not childish, not old. if you're looking for the younger end of the spectrum go with a solid white plastic watch. a $10 one.

i haven't thought about that in a while: declaring your mental age with a watch

I do like me some lacoste. it's nice, yet vague class-wise.

there's no need for names or gender associations-- it's not just women. for example, op wants to express his personality with accoutrements. he could find someone with similar interests and they could have 'a moment' but he'd soon realize he's not done wanting people based on their looks. why does personality matter anyway, you're not looking for someone to stay with for the next 200 years. as long as they have one [a personality] great, it's something to interface with.

word on the brothel thing though. it's something that should be experienced just for the perspective. sex is NOT worth liking someone over, when you know where to get whatever you want for [societally dangerous low price here].

take the wonder of sex away and i'm left with all these people who -can't- read my mind, and so spending time with them would be less-than-convenient. (and i'd have a better time by myself). i'll admit the occasional theater movie premiere solo is a bit uncomfortable, but it's still not worth any sort of commitment for company.

hah. if i had a bit more money i would hire an escort for the movies.

i talk with a lot of girls and are on friendly terms, just for my social health, and invariably they have seen new movies i keep th option open but i'm not so motivated to monopolize anyone's movie watching schedule. outside of movie premieres i can't think of anywhere i'm not proud to fly my bachelor flag

****. i've never thought of the escort thing for the movies. it's decadent and i like it. "hi, yeah i just need someone to meet me at the theater, i want to watch a movie." i wonder what prices are like these days. can't be that bad, the last movie i saw cost $45 with popcorn and a slushie.

waiting at the mall for your escort to show. lol it's on my bucket list