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Gallente Conspiracy theorists claim Elders are "from the future"
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Constantly Outraged Sebiestor
Gutter Press
#1 - 2014-02-02 18:18:45 UTC
On several discussion boards in the Gallente Federation and Minmatar Republic, a growing phenomenon in recent months are the conspiracy theories involving the Minmatar Elders.

One of the more widespread theories, originally written 5 years ago, by a Federation citizen known only by their pseudonym of "cigar_smoking_eagle", claims that the Elders are in fact "Republic Security Service commandos, sent back in time to guide the Republic authorities".

These alleged RSS commandos, with detailed technical and historical documents, had the mission to steer the Republic away from disaster. Their technological superiority is alleged to be why the Elders are so mysterious when they contact normal Republic citizens.

Outside of discussion boards, this theory meets with a lot of criticism and scorn.
"If they're from the future, well, they didn't do a good job. Amarrians still invaded, didn't they?" said one Sebiestor tribesman.
"Gallente influence is a pox upon our young people." said one elderly Sebiestor lady.
"Gallente, all playing with drones instead of real people, what is the world coming to?" said another elderly Sebiestor tribesman.
"I don't know about Elders, but I tell you, those Gallente girls, they have curves in all sorts of places", said a young Sebiestor mechanic.
"Elders, Amarr, Gallente, I don't care", said a Sebiestor exotic dancer. "I just want to dance, and let the Spirits guide me".

The Elders were, unsurprisingly, unavailable to comment.
Gosakumori Noh
Coven of One
#2 - 2014-02-02 20:00:26 UTC
Perhaps it was a time traveling Elder from the, um... future... yes, Elders from the future sounds about right for Matari... who shot dear Karie in the head, because, you know, she was going to seal a deal with Creo...whatsit? Sote? That Gallidoodle drone company. Where was I? Deals, right, a deal that would ultimately lead to the enslavement of Mankind by intelligent drones who, being intelligent, figured out Amarr had it right all along.

Go, go, Gallidoodle Drone Company!
Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#3 - 2014-02-02 21:05:21 UTC
someone should lay off the x-instinct.....
Karynn Denton
Astrometrica
#4 - 2014-02-02 21:49:05 UTC
Deitra Vess wrote:
someone should lay off the x-instinct.....

X

And what's wrong with X-instinct, hmm?

Or are you one of those pilots who remain ignorant of sig-radius?

(Any pilots who do care about sig-radius should contact me - we have a large quantity of standard and synth product at excellent prices, all quality-controlled for no side-effects)


As for Elders from the future? Meh, what do I care - they ain't buying and they ain't selling.

Karynn Denton

Caravan Master
Deitra Vess
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#5 - 2014-02-02 22:49:22 UTC
Karynn Denton wrote:
Deitra Vess wrote:
someone should lay off the x-instinct.....

X

And what's wrong with X-instinct, hmm?

Or are you one of those pilots who remain ignorant of sig-radius?

(Any pilots who do care about sig-radius should contact me - we have a large quantity of standard and synth product at excellent prices, all quality-controlled for no side-effects)


As for Elders from the future? Meh, what do I care - they ain't buying and they ain't selling.


nothings wrong with it, I'm merely saying moderation is key
Makkal Hanaya
Revenent Defence Corperation
#6 - 2014-02-03 09:48:26 UTC
Karynn Denton wrote:
Or are you one of those pilots who remain ignorant of sig-radius?

(Any pilots who do care about sig-radius should contact me - we have a large quantity of standard and synth product at excellent prices, all quality-controlled for no side-effects)

What bizarre slang.

I can't tell if you're selling something for weight loss or genital enhancement.

Render unto Khanid the things which are Khanid's; and unto God the things that are God's.
Kyllsa Siikanen
Tuonelan Virta
#7 - 2014-02-03 13:34:38 UTC
Welp. It's as sound as any other theory about the identity of the Elders.

May the dancer be moved by the Spirits and all that, I suppose.

“Crying is all right in its own way while it lasts. But you have to stop sooner or later, and then you still have to decide what to do.” 

― C.S. Lewis 
Anatole Madullier
Alexylva Paradox
#8 - 2014-02-03 14:45:11 UTC
Deitra Vess wrote:
someone should lay off the x-instinct.....


Never!

ॐ
Anabella Rella
Gradient
Electus Matari
#9 - 2014-02-03 14:51:52 UTC  |  Edited by: Anabella Rella
If I can find one of these time travelers I'm going to get the winning numbers for next week's Luminaire Lottery from them.

When the world is running down, you make the best of what's still around.
Elsebeth Rhiannon
Gradient
Electus Matari
#10 - 2014-02-03 14:54:52 UTC
Can't really see why you have to include "from the future" into that particular conspiracy theory. It works quite well without that complication.

Else
Anatole Madullier
Alexylva Paradox
#11 - 2014-02-03 15:03:36 UTC
Elsebeth Rhiannon wrote:
Can't really see why you have to include "from the future" into that particular conspiracy theory. It works quite well without that complication.

Else


Don't you know, everything is cooler when it's "from the future"

ॐ
Diana Kim
State Protectorate
Caldari State
#12 - 2014-02-03 16:07:55 UTC
Why anyone should care about what Gallente Conspiracy Terrorists claim?
Destroy them on contact! That's what we think about them!

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.
Pieter Tuulinen
Societas Imperialis Sceptri Coronaeque
Khimi Harar
#13 - 2014-02-03 16:09:40 UTC
Kim-haani, speculation has been rampant regarding your status. Can you clear up the question of where you have been these last months and what you have been doing?

Tell me you finally took a furlough to rest and recuperate.

For the first time since I started the conversation, he looks me dead in the eye. In his gaze are steel jackhammers, quiet vengeance, a hundred thousand orbital bombs frozen in still life.
Diana Kim
State Protectorate
Caldari State
#14 - 2014-02-03 16:23:04 UTC
Pieter Tuulinen wrote:
Kim-haani, speculation has been rampant regarding your status. Can you clear up the question of where you have been these last months and what you have been doing?

Tell me you finally took a furlough to rest and recuperate.

Negative.
I am sorry.

Honored are the dead, for their legacy guides us.

In memory of Tibus Heth, Caldari State Executor YC110-115, Hero and Patriot.
Claudia Osyn
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#15 - 2014-02-03 19:48:39 UTC
Diana Kim wrote:
Pieter Tuulinen wrote:
Kim-haani, speculation has been rampant regarding your status. Can you clear up the question of where you have been these last months and what you have been doing?

Tell me you finally took a furlough to rest and recuperate.

Negative.
I am sorry.

Yay! Your still alive!

A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.
Lady Katherine Devonshire
Royal Ammatar Engineering Corps
#16 - 2014-02-03 21:31:22 UTC
Pieter Tuulinen wrote:
Kim-haani, speculation has been rampant regarding your status. Can you clear up the question of where you have been these last months and what you have been doing?


She was on a secret mission to sabotage the Elders... in the future!

The sound of the Amarrian heart
Claudia Osyn
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#17 - 2014-02-03 23:30:50 UTC
Anabella Rella wrote:
If I can find one of these time travelers I'm going to get the winning numbers for next week's Luminaire Lottery from them.

I, too, am from the future. The winning numbers will cost you though...

A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.
Gosakumori Noh
Coven of One
#18 - 2014-02-03 23:33:59 UTC
Lady Katherine Devonshire wrote:
Pieter Tuulinen wrote:
Kim-haani, speculation has been rampant regarding your status. Can you clear up the question of where you have been these last months and what you have been doing?


She was on a secret mission to sabotage the Elders... in the future!


This observation just makes me all chartreuse with envy over not having thought of it myself.
Claudia Osyn
Non-Hostile Target
Wild Geese.
#19 - 2014-02-04 00:02:19 UTC
Gosakumori Noh wrote:
Lady Katherine Devonshire wrote:
Pieter Tuulinen wrote:
Kim-haani, speculation has been rampant regarding your status. Can you clear up the question of where you have been these last months and what you have been doing?


She was on a secret mission to sabotage the Elders... in the future!


This observation just makes me all chartreuse with envy over not having thought of it myself.

Well, you were a colourful character to begin with, one more won't hurt. Big smile

A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.
Rodj Blake
PIE Inc.
Khimi Harar
#20 - 2014-02-04 18:37:27 UTC
It's complete poppycock of course, but if it were true then they should make sure that they go back to the future before I catch up with them.

Of course, they may find that when they do go back to the future that the cluster is even more Amarrian than the future they left.

Dolce et decorum est pro Imperium mori
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