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The kids are home

First post
Author
Alex Grison
Grison Universal
#1 - 2013-10-07 07:29:40 UTC  |  Edited by: Alex Grison
"Mooooommmmm we're home from school"

"YOU AND YOUR BROTHER COME TO THE LIVING ROOM PLEASE"

The boys walked over to the living room. All of the furniture was piled in one corner, dirt from potted plants spotted the carpet.
“BOYS ITS TIME, ITS FINALLY TIME”

Mother started to violently flail her arms and jumping in place.
Sticky rope like silk started coming out of Mother’s mouth, she began to wrap the boys up in a cocoon. She skittered in circles around them, wrapping them tightly in the silk. After the boys were sufficiently wrapped she started tying their cocoon to the walls and furniture.

She started beating her head against the cocoon and smashing them around the room. Right as she was trying to unstick them from an overturned lamp. The front door slammed open.
“HONEY, I AM HOME HOME HOME HOME HOME HOME HOME”

Said dad, getting louder with each repetition of “home” he slammed the door behind him and walked into the kitchen.
“WORK WAS KILLER TODAY”

He grabbed a knife and walked over to the cutting board, he placed his hand, palm up on the board and began to carve out a large chunk of his palm.

Walking into the living room he popped the chunk of his palm casually into his mouth.
Upon seeing his wife, and kids in a cocoon. He began to produce the same strange silk from his mouth, he tied mom onto the kids and hung the whole bundle from the ceiling. He then tied himself to the cocoon.

After swaying for a few seconds the silk started to smoke, and then smolder. And then finally burst into flames and burn aggressively. As it burnt a strange and chunky orange substance dripped from the cocoon onto the floor and form a puddle.
After a few minutes of burning and dripping the fire went out.

The front door opened yet again and in walked a large man with a white lab coat that said “PRODUCT COLLECTOR” He produced a large plastic bag and small shovel.

He began to scoop the orange chunky substance into the bag. Once he got most of it into the bag he sealed It with a zip tie, and spit on it.

He walked out of the front door and drove off.

yes

Ammzi
Dreddit
Test Alliance Please Ignore
#2 - 2013-10-07 07:36:29 UTC
what the .....
what
Liafcipe9000
Critically Preposterous
#3 - 2013-10-07 07:38:57 UTC
what the MEGAWATT **** are you smoking?!?!?!
Bo Dado
Aliastra
Gallente Federation
#4 - 2013-10-07 07:40:21 UTC
Was there a point? Or are you just mentally disturbed? I recommend prozac.
Nashuar Attor
Rat Kings Crew
#5 - 2013-10-07 07:46:08 UTC
Dude.

Get some help.

Seriously.

You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel.

Hra Neuvosto
Party Cat Enterprises
#6 - 2013-10-07 07:47:13 UTC
I always enjoy your posts, OP, another great read.
Anomaly One
Doomheim
#7 - 2013-10-07 07:50:46 UTC  |  Edited by: Anomaly One
I've seen this movie..


Also expected max payne, disappointed.
TharOkha
0asis Group
#8 - 2013-10-07 07:52:34 UTC
weed...that's an excellent idea for early morning. Blink
Kalrissia
Temporal Incursion
#9 - 2013-10-07 08:00:32 UTC
I err... wait?
Rhea Rankin Nolen
Science and Trade Institute
Caldari State
#10 - 2013-10-07 08:22:22 UTC
Another nice read..but can we get EVE related stories please?!
Ze4K DK
Luxury Yacht Social Club
#11 - 2013-10-07 08:42:18 UTC
That was a very weird story... I like it! :D
Barrogh Habalu
Imperial Shipment
Amarr Empire
#12 - 2013-10-07 09:49:38 UTC
This time around, I'm positively sure I don't want to try the thing you're smoking there.
Alastair Ormand
Mine all the things
#13 - 2013-10-07 10:10:25 UTC
My reaction to reading thread.

http://i.imgur.com/pTywWdm.png

I discourage running with scissors.

Lightspeed Champion
Native Freshfood
Minmatar Republic
#14 - 2013-10-07 10:28:46 UTC
P

Your posts never disappoint.

Send any badposting-hate-mail to Sol Kal'orr. I promise to read it when I resub.

Kate stark
#15 - 2013-10-07 10:29:52 UTC
Lightspeed Champion wrote:
P

Your posts never disappoint.


he's just as bad in-game, to be honest.

Yay, this account hasn't had its signature banned. or its account, if you're reading this.

Xearal
Dead's Prostitutes
The Initiative.
#16 - 2013-10-07 11:36:06 UTC
Stealth WoD promo post detected ;)

Does railgun ammunition come in Hollow Point?

Pak Narhoo
Splinter Foundation
#17 - 2013-10-07 11:46:34 UTC
Not only wronk forum but also wronk game,

EA deadspace12,

<--- that away,


please.
ISD Dorrim Barstorlode
ISD Community Communications Liaisons
ISD Alliance
#18 - 2013-10-07 12:07:59 UTC
Quote:
5. Trolling is prohibited.

Trolling is a defined as a post that is deliberately designed for the purpose of angering and insulting other players in an attempt to incite retaliation or an emotional response. Posts of this nature are disruptive, often abusive and do not contribute to the sense of community that CCP promote.

Quote:
22. Post constructively.

Negative feedback can be very useful to further improve EVE Online provided that it is presented in a civil and factual manner. All users are encouraged to honestly express their feelings regarding EVE Online and how it can be improved. Posts that are non-constructive, insulting or in breach of the rules will be deleted regardless of how valid the ideas behind them may be. Users are also reminded that posting with a lack of content also constitutes non-constructive posting.

Thread closed.

ISD Dorrim Barstorlode

Senior Lead

Community Communication Liaisons (CCLs)

Interstellar Services Department