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Star Trek: Into Darkness or Dear JJ Abrams, please stop making Star Trek movies **spoiler alert**

Author
Mr Kidd
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
#1 - 2013-09-03 19:47:39 UTC  |  Edited by: Mr Kidd
So yeah, I just watched this movie.....well most of it. I got up and left as Spock was yelling KHHHAAAAANNNNN! I mean, seriously, this movie is trying so hard to pull from past successes, failing miserably at it all while being framed as NEW and original.

I realize the new Star Treks are a re-invisioned version of the Star Trek universe, different space-time continuum and all. I'm ok with that. Lets have completely unpredictable stories, surprise endings, original ideas like how Battlestar Galactica was re-invisioned, crappy series finale aside. Having grown up with the original series, it was copacetic, IMO.

The movie started alright. We picked up right where we left off from the last movie, Kirk and Spock are at odds. It certainly adds some interesting dynamics to their relationship. Kirk breaks the prime directive in order to save Spock and in return he's thrown under the bus by his by the book first officer losing command of his ship. There's much potential here for character development which eventually could, like the original movies, make one think these two may eventually become true friends. The discussion in the turbo lift is a prime example.

But on to the next chapter....we have superbad Mr. Villain who destroys a Starfleet base in order to get the heads of Starfleet together for a gangsteresque assassination 23rd century style. The story is being set here in a way that isn't unwelcomed. It's actually a good twist to older story lines since we learn that Mr. Villain is none other than Khan Noonien Singh, though what is completely unpredictable here is that he's a white Anglo with a British accent. My hats off to Mr. Abrams for completely keeping me guessing who this bad guy was right up until Khan's name was spoken for the first time. Sure, I had my suspicions. The 72 photon torpedoes with people in cryo-sleep stuffed inside, the overt display of physical superiority as Kirk hammered away at the guy, unflinching seemingly defying the laws of physics, on Kronos. You'd have thought he was a Terminator model 101 the way Khan barely moved. But, hey, this guy is obviously completely Anglo white. I was half expecting a "new" villain in the Star Trek universe. That couldn't be right, this is JJ Abrams after all. Indeed it was Khan Noonien Singh. Abrams has effectively stepped back to the Jim Crow era when STTOS was invisioned and shot. But this time, lets not even paint the white Anglo in blackface. I suppose that would just be too much. Sure, Roddenberry used a man of hispanic heritage, Ricardo Montalban, At least there was an attempt to place a non-Anglo in a non-Anglo role. In the new movie, however, not even suspended disbelief could get me past this white guy playing Khan Noonien Singh. What? Abrams couldn't find a Bollywood actor? Perhaps he did and the actor kept trying to break into singing. I don't know. Still, we live in a world in which even South Asia has modern industries, skylines and education. Why not find a South Asian actor......surely they're out there!

TLDR - Khan attempts to kill off the heads of Starfleet, runs to Kronos. Kirk chases gets caught by Klingons. Khan saves him. Both go after side plot rogue Starfleet admiral in ship designed by Khan for Khan. No you don't need to know the details Abrams didn't even give the ship a name. Khan takes over ship. Khan beats up Enterprise. Khan gets his people back. They blow up because they're in torpedoes, remember? Or so you think....ah...plot twist. Psyche! They're on the Enterprise. Totally did not see that coming *rolls eyes* It's all over for Khan. Enterprise plummets into the Earth atmosphere. Warp drive is offline, no power. Kirk goes into the warp power chamber, realigns the dilithium crystals saving the day. I think I've seen this before. Scotty comms Spock who is on the bridge totally oblivious and tells him he better hurry. Spock arrives wanting to open the radiation door. Scotty says no, the radiation will flood the compartment. No, wait. I have seen this before!!! Kirk and Spock, have a moment speaking through the radiation glass. Spock says ship out of danger. They make the vulcan hand sign through the glass hand on hand. Kirk dies. Spock cries yells KKKHHHHAAAAAANNNNNN. I get up and leave so can't tell you how this horrible re-invisioned movie ends.

I exited the theater just as Khan's ship was plummeting past the Enterprise. When I say Khan's ship, I mean, it was still intact.....completely. How after 72 photon torpedoes....special...classified torpedoes just blew up ....from the inside of the ship was it still in one piece? Huh? We'd already established that the warheads were "armed" earlier in the movie. I just didn't feel like listening to the new Khan quoting Moby **** "With my last breath I spit at thee". Montalban did it. And he was a much better actor than the current Khan whose real name I can't be arsed to look up because I just don't care!

I sht you not. With none of the history, none of the comradery instead only adversary, Abrams wanted us to feel for the new Kirk and Spock in this moment that would otherwise still choke me up 30 years later in the original Wrath of Khan. Suffice it to say, my opinion of Abrams at this very moment is, "For all that is right in the universe, please Mr. Abrams, please please stop making Star Trek movies. Please for the children!"

Don't ban me, bro!

Alpheias
Tactical Farmers.
Pandemic Horde
#2 - 2013-09-03 20:01:41 UTC
J.J Abrams makes me almost want to forgive George Lucas for Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith.

Agent of Chaos, Sower of Discord.

Don't talk to me unless you are IQ verified and certified with three references from non-family members. Please have your certificate of authenticity on hand.

Motoko Kasaki
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#3 - 2013-09-03 20:47:27 UTC
I didn't think it was a bad film. I thought it could have been better. I had no problem following the story and so on, and it didn't bury me in trekkie-dom, which is very nice for those of us who are not trekkies (no offence to those who are).
However this was the franchise's chance to make me care about star trek and it didn't. I left thinking 'cool things go 'splody' as opposed to wanting to learn more about Star-Trek, the culture and the lore behind it. Thus as far as getting me into the Star-Trek verse, it failed. As a film it was good, the plot was compelling and the characters were relatable. Ultimately I'd watch it again, and the film was a sucess comercially because they managed to persuade me to buy a ticket so thus I suppose it could be considered 'job done' by JJ Abrams.

Glory to the State.

Surfin's PlunderBunny
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#4 - 2013-09-03 21:04:55 UTC
I liked it..... Oops

Though it is up there with DS9 with the problem of no one treks Evil

"Little ginger moron" ~David Hasselhoff 

Want to see what Surf is training or how little isk Surf has?  http://eveboard.com/pilot/Surfin%27s_PlunderBunny

baltec1
Bat Country
Pandemic Horde
#5 - 2013-09-03 21:11:19 UTC
I also liked it. Agree it could have done without the khaan bit and rather had more bones insulting people.
Tollen Gallen
Glory of Reprisal Enterprise
#6 - 2013-09-03 21:57:31 UTC  |  Edited by: Tollen Gallen
Alpheias wrote:
J.J Abrams makes me almost want to forgive George Lucas for Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith.




NEVER!!!!


Did'nt mind into the darkness, i quite like Benedict Cumberbatch, good as Holmes... 3rd series starting soon i think.

Zimmy Zeta - I f*cking love martinis. the original ones, with gin, not that vodka martini crap. Your old Friends can use me for 7 days, free!!!

Krixtal Icefluxor
INLAND EMPIRE Galactic
#7 - 2013-09-03 21:58:36 UTC
He's moved on to "Star Wars" now. I have mixed feelings about that I didn't have before seeing ST: ID.

"He has mounted his hind-legs, and blown crass vapidities through the bowel of his neck."  - Ambrose Bierce on Oscar Wilde's Lecture in San Francisco 1882

Eurydia Vespasian
Storm Hunters
#8 - 2013-09-03 22:02:30 UTC
i enjoyed these two new films.

and i've never liked star trek. but these ones are kind of neat. fun to watch and exciting on screen. i like the actors in them.
Alpheias
Tactical Farmers.
Pandemic Horde
#9 - 2013-09-03 22:20:16 UTC
Tollen Gallen wrote:
Alpheias wrote:
J.J Abrams makes me almost want to forgive George Lucas for Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith.




NEVER!!!!


Did'nt mind into the darkness, i quite like Benedict Cumberbatch, good as Holmes... 3rd series starting soon i think.


I knew it! Someone would take the bait. YOU NERD! Lol

Agent of Chaos, Sower of Discord.

Don't talk to me unless you are IQ verified and certified with three references from non-family members. Please have your certificate of authenticity on hand.

Caleidascope
Republic Military School
Minmatar Republic
#10 - 2013-09-03 22:40:39 UTC
I did not watch it. Reinventing the wheel... is not for me.

Life is short and dinner time is chancy

Eat dessert first!

Krixtal Icefluxor
INLAND EMPIRE Galactic
#11 - 2013-09-04 01:53:03 UTC
Eurydia Vespasian wrote:
i enjoyed these two new films.

and i've never liked star trek. but these ones are kind of neat. fun to watch and exciting on screen. i like the actors in them.


Oh. the first one was flawless.

It truly was left open at the end to "go where no Trek had gone before". Then like a dog to it's vomit, they return to Khan.

I was truly surprised when that was revealed as of all the possible stories that was the most obvious and would be a sign of franchise laziness, and I had figured there was no way. Boy was I ever wrong.

"He has mounted his hind-legs, and blown crass vapidities through the bowel of his neck."  - Ambrose Bierce on Oscar Wilde's Lecture in San Francisco 1882

Pepper Swift
Perkone
Caldari State
#12 - 2013-09-04 02:20:14 UTC
i liked both movies.. :D

Sure it borrowed a lot from the wrath of Khan.. (makes sense they would want to cash in on what some consider to be the greatest trek movie)

but i still generally liked it.


Though i had a problem with the homing phasers from the USS vengeance... dafuq was that.

What I need most.. is a day between Saturday and Sunday...

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Graygor
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#13 - 2013-09-04 02:51:01 UTC  |  Edited by: Graygor
Just an odd observation. Every Indian character in hollywood movies nowadays needs a flawless English accent because of course all Indians who do well must reside in the UK. Roll

With interbreeding and mixed race heritage Khan could well be white anglo.

I was in school with a girl whose last name was Singh an she was blonde haired and blue eyed. Father was Indian mother was from Birmingham in the UK.

Just saying its not impossible.

"I think you should buy a new Mayan calendar. Mine has muscle cars on it." - Kenneth O'Hara

"I dont think that can happen, you can see Gray has his invuln field on in his portrait." - Commissar "Cake" Kate

Mr Kidd
Center for Advanced Studies
Gallente Federation
#14 - 2013-09-04 02:57:02 UTC
Graygor wrote:
Just an odd observation. Every Indian character in hollywood movies nowadays needs a flawless English accent because of course all Indians who do well must reside in the UK. Roll

With interbreeding and mixed race heritage Khan could well be white anglo.

I was in school with a girl whose last name was Singh an she was blonde haired and blue eyed. Father was Indian mother was from Birmingham in the UK.

Just saying its not impossible.


Except that "historical" pictures depicting Khan in TOS clearly depict someone of Indian heritage. The time line didn't diverge until the 23rd century and Khan is from the 1990's.

Yeah, I know, it's a technicality. ;)

Don't ban me, bro!

Graygor
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#15 - 2013-09-04 03:09:38 UTC
Oh yeah i forgot that bit.

Well put it down to bums on seats and pleasing the female demographic then. P

"I think you should buy a new Mayan calendar. Mine has muscle cars on it." - Kenneth O'Hara

"I dont think that can happen, you can see Gray has his invuln field on in his portrait." - Commissar "Cake" Kate

Pepper Swift
Perkone
Caldari State
#16 - 2013-09-04 03:14:34 UTC
Graygor wrote:
Oh yeah i forgot that bit.

Well put it down to bums on seats and pleasing the female demographic then. P


But Benedict Cumberbatch's take on Khan was excellent i thought..

What I need most.. is a day between Saturday and Sunday...

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Zimmy Zeta
Perkone
Caldari State
#17 - 2013-09-04 04:54:22 UTC
I didn't watch the movie, I'll have to admit that I am not a huge Star Trek fan at all.

But I found OP's summary very entertaining and and a very good read.



I'd like to apologize for the poor quality of the post above and sincerely hope you didn't waste your time reading it. Yes, I do feel bad about it.

Nyla Skin
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#18 - 2013-09-04 07:03:41 UTC  |  Edited by: Nyla Skin
1. You should have known he was not good director since the first reboot movie.
2. Sounds like it was even worse than I expected. Instead of rehashing old stories, Hollywood is now rehashing individual scenes? Sad -> sad

Me, Im not going to watch any more J.J.Abrams movies. I preferred Star trek back when they were solving problems with their smarts instead of guns.

ps. I agree the topic post was a good read so thanks

In after the lock :P   - CCP Falcon www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies

Baby ChuChu
Ice Cream Asylum
#19 - 2013-09-04 08:45:16 UTC
Meh, I didn't like the second as much as I liked the first, but I still had fun. My only problem is the pacing for roughly the first 45 minutes is all over the place. Major things happen, they dwell on it for a sec then BOOM, something else major goes down. Like, 3-4 pretty big things happen within that period and they seem to gloss over them at an alarming speed. Other than that, I didn't have any big problems with the movie.

Well, I did kinda roll my eyes when they brought back old Spock, but meh. I didn't mind that much. But yeah, I enjoyed it. The first is still miles better, but I'd watch this again.
Shalua Rui
Rui Freelance Mining
#20 - 2013-09-04 10:32:24 UTC
Tollen Gallen wrote:
Did'nt mind into the darkness, i quite like Benedict Cumberbatch, good as Holmes... 3rd series starting soon i think.


Didn't mind it either, it wasn't great though... watched it yesterday after Iron Man 3... and: Benedict saved that movie 100%.

...can't wait for the 3rd season. Big smile

"ginger forum goddess, space gypsy and stone nibbler extraordinaire!" Shalua Rui - CEO and founder of Rui Freelance Mining (RFLM)

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