These forums have been archived and are now read-only.

The new forums are live and can be found at https://forums.eveonline.com/

EVE General Discussion

 
  • Topic is locked indefinitely.
12Next page
 

EVE Joke: Why are minmatar ships so fast?

First post
Author
Previous Topic Next Topic
Liafcipe9000
Critically Preposterous
#1 - 2013-06-25 17:50:21 UTC
So a slicer just warps into an asteroid field, and this Firetail passes him by at 500 m/s.

The slicer pilot gets angry and starts speeding up, and soon passes the Firetail at 750 m/s.

The firetail then then passes the slicer at 900 m/s, and the pilot shouts: "YOU KNOW MINMATAR?"

The slicer pilot is FURIOUS! speeding up, he passed the firetail at 1,100 m/s.

The firetail then passed the slicer again at 1,400 m/s, the pilot shouts again: "YOU KNOW MINMATAR?"

The slicer pilot gets REAL MAD. he passes the firetail at 1,600 m/s.

The firetail passes the slicer again at 2,000 m/s.

The slicer pilot pushes to Full Speed, hitting 2,000m/s, flying alongside the firetail.

The firetail pilot shouts again: "YOU KNOW MINMATAR?"

The slicer pilot shouts: "YES! I DO!"

Then the firetail pilot shouts:
"WHERE ARE THE BRAKES?!?!"
Anderson Footman
Deep Core Mining Inc.
Caldari State
#2 - 2013-06-25 17:56:35 UTC
Hah. +1
Xercodo
Cruor Angelicus
#3 - 2013-06-25 17:57:41 UTC
A little too drawn out....but decent, +1

The Drake is a Lie
De'Veldrin
Republic University
Minmatar Republic
#4 - 2013-06-25 17:58:02 UTC
I admit it, I lold

De'Veldrin's Corollary (to Malcanis' Law): Any idea that seeks to limit the ability of a large nullsec bloc to do something in the name of allowing more small groups into sov null will inevitably make it that much harder for small groups to enter sov null.
Jenn aSide
Worthless Carebears
The Initiative.
#5 - 2013-06-25 18:02:41 UTC
De'Veldrin wrote:
I admit it, I lold


Surprisingly so did I, then I QQ'd because that is nothing here to troll.....
De'Veldrin
Republic University
Minmatar Republic
#6 - 2013-06-25 18:04:30 UTC
Jenn aSide wrote:
De'Veldrin wrote:
I admit it, I lold


Surprisingly so did I, then I QQ'd because that is nothing here to troll.....


I could throw a cry more noob at you if that will make you feel better about it?

De'Veldrin's Corollary (to Malcanis' Law): Any idea that seeks to limit the ability of a large nullsec bloc to do something in the name of allowing more small groups into sov null will inevitably make it that much harder for small groups to enter sov null.
Mr Aurilen
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#7 - 2013-06-25 18:07:14 UTC
That was brilliant, the only question is, why did the Mini ship not fall apart once it passed 1,500 m/s?
De'Veldrin
Republic University
Minmatar Republic
#8 - 2013-06-25 18:09:08 UTC
Mr Aurilen wrote:
That was brilliant, the only question is, why did the Mini ship not fall apart once it passed 1,500 m/s?


T2 Duct Tape module.

De'Veldrin's Corollary (to Malcanis' Law): Any idea that seeks to limit the ability of a large nullsec bloc to do something in the name of allowing more small groups into sov null will inevitably make it that much harder for small groups to enter sov null.
Winter Archipelago
Autumn Industrial Enterprises
#9 - 2013-06-25 18:16:09 UTC
How do you get this thing out of second gear?!

For the Newbies: The 8 Golden Rules - The Magic 14 Skills - Finding the Right Corp - EVE University Wiki
Xeraphi
Perkone
Caldari State
#10 - 2013-06-25 18:16:18 UTC
I don't know Minmatar, I only know Winmatar.

New target lock death animation problem #1 ^ eye strain and pain Temporary workaround found to one of these.
Miilla
Hulkageddon Orphanage
#11 - 2013-06-25 18:22:36 UTC  |  Edited by: Miilla
Minbari ships are fast, but rusty
Amar ships are hardass armour but have only 2 real damage types in four colours.
Caldari ships are like cowards with distance jamming tactics
Gallantee ships are good haulers and miner support but nobody cares about gallantee and their 2 dmg type ammo.

They all have strengths and weaknesses, cross train if you don't like it.
Seven Koskanaiken
Shadow Legions.
SONS of BANE
#12 - 2013-06-25 18:23:03 UTC
De'Veldrin wrote:
Mr Aurilen wrote:
That was brilliant, the only question is, why did the Mini ship not fall apart once it passed 1,500 m/s?


T2 Duct Tape module.


Did you hear about the failed T2 Duct Tape trader? He just couldn't let it go for any price.
Ottersmacker
Genos Occidere
HYDRA RELOADED
#13 - 2013-06-25 18:32:16 UTC
so much dialogue while accelerating to such pitiful speeds

must be a case of oversized afterburners

i just locked an open door.. strange, yet symbolically compelling.
Hells Merc
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#14 - 2013-06-25 19:31:58 UTC
I thought it was going to be similar to a why are French tanks faster in reverse theme...
Liafcipe9000
Critically Preposterous
#15 - 2013-06-25 19:58:45 UTC
Miilla wrote:
Minbari ships are fast, but rusty
Amar ships are hardass armour but have only 2 real damage types in four colours.
Caldari ships are like cowards with distance jamming tactics
Gallantee ships are good haulers and miner support but nobody cares about gallantee and their 2 dmg type ammo.

They all have strengths and weaknesses, cross train if you don't like it.

you're mixing between the amarr and gallente.
lasers are for mining, and gallente deal the highest DPS in the game.
Meytal
Doomheim
#16 - 2013-06-25 20:01:33 UTC
Winter Archipelago wrote:
How do you get this thing out of second gear?!

BEEP BEEP!
Azurae
Doomheim
#17 - 2013-06-25 20:06:05 UTC
Jenn aSide wrote:
De'Veldrin wrote:
I admit it, I lold


Surprisingly so did I, then I QQ'd because that is nothing here to troll.....

actually there is.

if the firetail passed the slicer at 2000 m/s and the slicer then speeds up to exactly 2000 m/s himself, how could he possibly be alongside the firetail? he would still be behind him....

nice idea but its lacking in the details
Jafit McJafitson
Viziam
Amarr Empire
#18 - 2013-06-25 20:06:46 UTC
Hey baby, I'm like a Celestis, I make you damp from across the room

Cool
Thaman Arnuad
The Caldarian Templars
#19 - 2013-06-25 20:14:18 UTC
Jenn aSide wrote:
De'Veldrin wrote:
I admit it, I lold


Surprisingly so did I, then I QQ'd because that is nothing here to troll.....


If the Slicer speeds up to 2000M/s how does he arrive next to the Firetail which is already travelling at 2000M/s.
Liafcipe9000
Critically Preposterous
#20 - 2013-06-26 08:34:35 UTC
Thaman Arnuad wrote:
Jenn aSide wrote:
De'Veldrin wrote:
I admit it, I lold


Surprisingly so did I, then I QQ'd because that is nothing here to troll.....


If the Slicer speeds up to 2000M/s how does he arrive next to the Firetail which is already travelling at 2000M/s.

Magnets. Cool
12Next page