Out of Pod Experience

...enjoying some quick lunch because the cafeteria is closed today. As I sat there eating my steak and cheese breakfast burrito, my attention was turned towards a groundskeeper who was busy trimming the trees in the parking lot. More specifically, it was focused on the tool that he was using and it occurred to me that these just might be the greatest zombie hand to hand tools ever. Chainsaws!

Wait, what? Dietrich you moron, everyone knows to grab chainsaws during the zombie apocalypse!

Ah, but these aren't just any chainsaw, these are pole chainsaws! That's right, put a good 9' of distance between you and something that wants to have you for lunch! I was impressed with the finesse the groundskeeper had as he trimmed some of the upper branches and I realized that this thing could be as effective as a Naginata, a gasoline powered chain Naginata.

Along with all the greatness that the typical chainsaw provides, you also have the ability to use the long stem to push back one of those crazy ravenous monsters without the threat of losing half a hand to poor grip locations. Furthermore, like the model shown above with that small 25cc motor, you effectively have a weighted blunt end that you can swing around like a crazed lumberjack for if or when you run out of gas, although a morbidly creative person would just find a way to lock the trigger and use both sides at the same time like a true apocalyptic road warrior.

I see now that I am going to have to add this to my arsenal when the zombie apocalypse happens. While many of you will get treed in a high place with your baseball bat or katana wondering what to do next, I'll be perched happily in my spot gleefully sawing off the heads of my victim zombie friends 6' below me.

Awesome! Just don't forget to wear your protective eyewear when using chainsaws on zombies. Safety First.

Depends on the type of zombie... walking dead slow type, that is great!

28 days later super rabies type... not so great

the canadian tuxedo makes for excellent armor as well, in RL, not the movies.

while branch saws might seem great for cutting off heads, they really are more for smaller branches, and remember, the longer a device is, the harder it is to aim. Not to mention that it will get tied up at a distance, and even slow zombies will close that distance fast.

I recommend getting a friend to wear a riot shield and block for you, as you saw your way to Macy's.

You are officially part of my Zombie survival team, code named: Bait

Right up until their hungry moaning attracts the zombies from the direction you're walking and you're surrounded.

No seriously, evasion is the best solution. If the world is overrun with zombies no one is going to single-handedly wipe out the threat. Just go where they aren't, make yourself a safe place, and then kill any that come your way.

I enjoy the thought exercise of planning for a zombie apocalypse. I know where I'd go, how I'd secure the area, and how I'd subsist for the long term. I've also got plans for the zombies once my family is safe. Hint: it doesn't involve terminating them.

My weapon of choice would clearly be the Lee Enfield

.303 or the 7.62 conversion?

I learnt to shoot in the cadets using one of those , still have mine, licence has lapsed and we have silly gun laws here so it's been deactivated.

Regarding posting, always feel free to check the forum rules for the particular sub-forum and the overall forum rules. These are the rules that govern the threads, and if you find your post may fall under a rule, I'd advise against posting that content.

With regards to guns, remember to keep this rule in mind and ensure that your image doesn't violate any of these rules: