Out of Pod Experience

Well, hopefully my response will be encouraging.

I met a gal in community college. We hit it off right of way and became "best friends" but I knew i wanted to marry this girl. We stayed "best friends" for a long time, through community college, through university even though we went to different schools, I would visit her over the summer occasionally, etc. After college, she came to my graduation party where I kissed her for the first time, we snuggled a bit and it was awesome! She was being playful etc.

I moved away for a job, she sort of did too, and started dating this other guy but we kept in touch weekly to check up on each other. She had a horrible relationship with a dumb*** prior to this new guy, so of course I was over protective. My feelings for her grew stronger and I convinced myself not to worry because I just knew I was going to marry her. I just knew it in the depth of my heart. So, I gave her some space to figure things out, and to hopefully see that this other guy she was dating was not going to be for her.

Fast forward another year or two and our weekly conversations turn into monthly check ups, she calls me less and less to "vent" and to "dump" and overall seems happier. Every now and then she would call needing someone to talk to as she tried to get a job as a cop, and looked for work. She still dated the same guy. I was a little concerned but not overly concerned. I move to a different state, get a new and better job, life is great! However I'm in this new state, in a new city with family, friends, and her 2 states away. It's a little lonely. I call her out of the blue to update her on my new contact information and address etc. We catch up a bit on the phone as it's been a few months since we've spoken.

As we are about to wrap up the conversation, she says, "Oh, by the way, I'm engaged!" My heart hit the floor. "Oh..." I said, "Uh, yeah, that's great... congrats". She knew something was wrong. "What's wrong?" "Yeah, nothing, nothing, not important. Hey, it was great talking to you, and congrats again. let me know if you need anything. I'll be here."

With that, I hung up the phone and wouldn't talk to her for a long time. The pain was incredible. Here I was in this "cliquey" city, didn't know anyone, about to start a new job, far away from family and friend support, and the love of my life just told me she was about to marry some other guy. Things got worse from there. My Mom's mother passed away, My folks decided to call it quits after 31 years, a close friend of the family passed away, a close friend of mine back in Illinois passed away at 28 years old from a 3rd bout of colon cancer. Uncle Jack Daniels and I became good friends as did Cousin Captain Morgan. My boss passed away from cancer at my new job within a year of me being there, and the new lady who took over was Satan's offspring. I hit rock bottom. My job was making me depressed, the circumstances around me weren't helping either.


There's a happy ending to this story though. It involved a decision to align my heart, my thoughts, my actions, and my attitude along a different path. In 2007 my parent's divorce was finalized, a weight was lifted though anger towards both of them would remain, and I decided to recommit my life to faith. it was the best decision I could've made. I know this all sounds cliche but I'm a thick headed guy sometimes and it's how it needed to happen to me for me to wake up to the fact that this life was bigger than my sh**** circumstances and my broken heart. I knew that there were parts of me that needed to be taken care of before I could hope to fulfill the responsibility of husband and eventually father.

It definitely got worse before it got better. I met another woman, after 3 years of living in this city, she helped align me to the right path, put me in a place to wear my heart on my sleeve again, and then trampled all over it. But this time was different. I was miserable for awhile sure but I got better quicker and realized that the distraction of a girlfriend needed to be removed if I was going to better the parts of my personality and life that needed bettering. I was being prepared. All the pain, all the hurt, all the heartache, all the crumbling of my world around me was preparing me for something great. It was preparing me for something better than I could've ever imagined. It was preparing me to finally meet that which I desired most, a wife.

Fast forward to 2008, February of all months. I meet this lovely and attractive woman while serving at church. She's wearing a longer jean skirt, a cute ruffly yellow shirt with super hot "teacher" glasses. We exchange smiles, she leaves, I leave and we don't really get to talk.

I fly out to another state for a job interview, accept the job, and prepare to move by the end of February (it was sweeps so i had to give the station I was working at sufficient notice to leave after sweeps was over). When i return home, I get a facebook message from her. I didn't even read the whole message only the "I don't know if you remember me but..." and I knew who it was. Long story short, we spend the entire rest of February hanging out. I move 3 states away, we date long distance for 6 months, I propose on a plane at 30k feet between Minneapolis and Madison, WI. She says yes, and we are married still to this day, almost 4 years later.

Pain may suck when it happens, but the growth you get out of it becomes all worth it in the end. Keep your head high!

Out to sea on the tender, making lines in the ocean for no reason other then to prove we can do it, crew bored. Skipper calls a 'Steel Beach' picnic, which basically means "Go hang out on the flight deck, you slackers. I'll send the cooks up to grill you some sliders and dogs. Now git outta ma hair!"

Some evil soul sets up a karaoke machine, and people proceed to harass us with crappy renditions of various songs. Then a Voice launches into "Can't Help (Falling in Love)." Dropped jaws all around - it was the cute Thrid Class Lithographer from Repair Admin, and she had Pipes. Her eyes were locked on me. She followed with the Righteous Brother's "Unchained Melody." By this point, half the crew were staring at her, and the other half staring at me. Applause and wolf-whistles all around when she was done.

Pretty much kicked me straight out of the dating pool,* right then and there. The girl is bold. Determined, too. She gets what she wants. Which is why she's my wife.




* I mean seriously; Not a female on the boat was going to challenge her for me after that. Hell, I could barely get them to talk to me on a professional level, much less look at me. And none of the guys were going to bother with her - She was clearly not interested in anyone but me. I know what it feels like to be branded.

Fixed

I went to the campus to look for a girlfriend.
As I casually scanned the dinning hall while slowly walking around the perimeter, I was given strange looks by some of the freshmen. For those that have been around for awhile, the occurrence of an androgynous man in a trench coat and a fedora is not out of the ordinary. In fact it's something they have gotten so comfortable with it's as though they understand. The only women who are even the least bit unnerved by my calculating gaze are those that just recently enrolled. I scanned table to table, face to face with meticulous zeal and eventually found a table where several girls where discussing genetics. I approached, pulled out a chair 1 seat away from one of the girls and ever so gracefully lifted the fedora off my head with my fingers pinching the front most part of the crown. I sat down and began to listen to them. They continued talking as if I wasn't present. I wanted so much to engage in intellectual discussion with them but my better judgment resulted in me being nothing more than a passive observer.


I was wondering the 3rd floor of the science building which is something I do often. As I was walking towards the end of the hall something caught my eye. A paper stapled to the announcement board. It was not there, or at least it was moved or displaced enough that I would pick up on it as an anomaly in what is otherwise a very familiar flow of stimuli. It was for a lecture of relationships and how to communicate with people.

I was just in time, it was today and I had every intention of participating. Statistically the ratio of females to males at an event of this nature would be in my favor and so it was. I arrived and sat down in the back most row in the center most seat. The lecturer arrived and spoke for maybe 15 mins about her purely anecdotal experiences with relationships. She mentioned she had a masters in social work not to mention her own private practice. Any hope I had of learning something from her was crushed when the QnA session started. Many of these women had real problems with easy and tangible answers. Instead of answering ANY of their questions the so called "expert" merely reflected questions back at the person originally asking them. She showed at most a minimal understanding of psychology and behavior. I was appalled when she misused terminology and went as far as to flat out misinform the audience. I guess a masters in social work isn't that demanding...

I made mental note of the females who expressed questions in the lecture so that I could approach them later on and give them more concrete answers.

Eventually, I went home.

Foreveralone.jpg

^^^Sadly I can attest to that even as a heterosexual man.

Chick I was hanging out with had a gay friend who frequented the local gay club. He frequented so she frequented, and if I wanted to hang I would have to frequent as well. I could never get in her pants but damn me if I didn't get a dozen numbers from the guys on the first night.

And yes, it was a major culture shock but I got over it eventually.

...and here are his bones!

hate to break it to ya, but you don't needa be gay to have it easy

this man is now masquerading as a brilliant mechanical engineering major, and things are pretty easy

whoops accidental double post

Well just an update for those kind enough to share their own stories.
Shes wants to talk so we can get some stuff sorted. Neither of us seem to know whats going on but at least its better than silence lol.

Also i am yet to meet anyone who doesnt like to be complimented and shown that theyre worth the effort. ESPECIALLY those who say they dont like all the romance!

That's an orgy you're describing....

Like "the pile" in South Park

Last night I came home late from work, shoved a cheesecake that must have weighed 5 pounds at her, and went to bed.

She's happy.


I'm happy that she weighs the same as she did when she was 17.