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Crime & Punishment

 
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everyone is getting their money - working through the list!!
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Mushroom Hed
Birdy Num Nums
#1 - 2012-05-06 06:52:11 UTC
I go to the trouble of copy-pasting the most generous offers from Jita's local chat and travel around the universe offering them myself, out of the goodness of my heart.

What do the greedy citizens of EVE say to this?

"Yes Mushroom Hed, Such generosity! You are a wonderful person! So selfless! So generous! So good!"

NO! They complain all the time, and call me names. In this thread I put the mails and conversations from the most impatient and rude EVE citizens.

SHAME ON YOU:
Mushroom Hed
Birdy Num Nums
#2 - 2012-05-06 06:53:41 UTC
I will hunt you
From: Canais Lupus
Sent: 2012.05.05 17:33
To: Mushroom Hed,

You should never leave Higsec.... If i find you i will hunt you down... You had the chance to give me my money back. Pray to god that i will never find you.

where is my money
From: Canais Lupus
Sent: 2012.05.05 17:06
To: Mushroom Hed,

i send you 100m isk 9 minutes ago. I wanted you to double it but i still recived nothig.

300k ISK reminder
From: Shin Kyto
Sent: 2012.05.06 05:45
To: Mushroom Hed,

Hopefully you only went to bed & not try to disappear on me, before fulfilling your promise of doubling the 150,000,00 ISK I had sent to you last night at 2012.05.06 5:16 GMT

Have a good day,
Shin
Mushroom Hed
Birdy Num Nums
#3 - 2012-05-06 06:59:04 UTC
super fun time
From: Josma Meric
Sent: 2012.05.06 05:28
To: Mushroom Hed,

say i was going to give you a chance to give the isk back, but now i get to do this the fun way :)....you are going to regret every moment from the first time you stole from me...giving back the isk cant save you now
__________________________________________________________________

isk
From: Xenon Orodon
Sent: 2012.05.04 16:56
To: Mushroom Hed,

can i get my 13 mil back pls?
__________________________________________________________________

hey
From: Victor Boogaaurd
Sent: 2012.05.04 16:47
To: Mushroom Hed,

I sent you 30 mil.... where is mine
__________________________________________________________________

isk
From: Victor Boogaaurd
Sent: 2012.05.04 16:44
To: Mushroom Hed,

dont let me down
__________________________________________________________________

isk
From: GateTrasher
Sent: 2012.05.02 02:34
To: Mushroom Hed,

I sent you 220 mil and you sent no isk
__________________________________________________________________

YOur little giveaway
From: Kayumi Mura
Sent: 2012.04.26 18:19
To: Mushroom Hed,

I sent you 29 MIl. I expect you will be sending it back, ELse your just giving yourself a bad name.

__________________________________________________________________

200mil
From: SuburbanCommando
Sent: 2012.04.13 04:22
To: Mushroom Hed,

I recently sent you 200mil in Dodixie approx 15min ago. Awaiting return.
__________________________________________________________________
200mil
From: SuburbanCommando
Sent: 2012.04.13 04:42
To: Mushroom Hed,

Please send 400mil or reported.
__________________________________________________________________

check wallet
From: Josma Meric
Sent: 2012.04.12 23:20
To: Mushroom Hed,

sent you 100mil if you were scamming me thats fine ill let you go just please reply one way or the other.
Cannibal Kane
Viziam
Amarr Empire
#4 - 2012-05-06 06:59:24 UTC  |  Edited by: Cannibal Kane
....

Nevermind

"Kane is the End Boss of Highsec." -Psychotic Monk
Mushroom Hed
Birdy Num Nums
#5 - 2012-05-06 07:02:26 UTC
ha
From: Shotz11
Sent: 2012.03.20 22:57
To: Mushroom Hed,

transaction recorder and u will be reported. gratz
______________________________________

wow
From: Keven Ituin
Sent: 2012.03.18 03:43
To: Mushroom Hed,

your so gay
______________________________________

i love you skeety!
From: Alexander Rothchild
Sent: 2012.03.10 10:43
To: Mushroom Hed,

my parakeet, skeety, eats my diarrea almost daily. You just need to become one with the bird and the mystical powers with held in the bird with unleash in the form of him eating liquified poop. i tried my own diarria it’s not half as bad as youd expect. it’s realy tasty and nutrious. he loves to roll in it, it’s almost like a mating ritual before we do the nasty. some look at it as beastiality but it’s realy just pure cold hard love! i love you skeety!
______________________________________
wheres my money
From: Valdarith Zeattzer
Sent: 2012.03.04 01:55
To: Mushroom Hed,

i want my 400 mill or a bounty is going on you
______________________________________

-
From: Mycool Jahksn
Sent: 2011.12.10 21:47
To: Mushroom Hed,

burn in hell
Mushroom Hed
Birdy Num Nums
#6 - 2012-05-06 07:04:09 UTC
WTF

[06:28:49] Josma Meric > you owe me 400mil
[06:29:06] Mushroom Hed > Dearest Esteemed Friend, I am Nigerian Royal Family, I require ISK to help release a large inherritance that I will happily share, please forward any ISK to me with great haste. Yours Sincerely, Sanni Ahmeed.
[06:29:41] Josma Meric > i dont think you realize the dire situation youve put yourself into
[06:30:03] Josma Meric > you have 24hrs to render said isk
[06:30:08] Josma Meric > i will collect
[06:30:22] Josma Meric > one way or another
[06:30:47] Josma Meric > just in case you think about running think again
[06:31:03] Mushroom Hed > who are u clint eastwood?
[06:31:03] Josma Meric > if you had any idea who you were dealing with at this very moment
[06:31:17] Josma Meric > you would have **** yourself multiple times
[06:31:43] Josma Meric > :) but please delay and make my day :)
Florian Bao
Black Box Technologies
#7 - 2012-05-06 07:37:13 UTC
+1 for effort i guess?
Solstice Project
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#8 - 2012-05-06 08:04:44 UTC
lol hey, come back to hek ! :D
Aiwha
School of Applied Knowledge
Caldari State
#9 - 2012-05-06 12:58:15 UTC
Well, that was mildly entertaining to read.

Sanity is fun leaving the body.
Christine Peeveepeeski
Low Sec Concepts
#10 - 2012-05-06 13:09:16 UTC
I love you
From: Mushroom Hed
Sent: 2012.05.05 17:33
To: Christine Peeveepeeski,

Please have my babies, your wonder is only eclipsed by your power and latent sexuality.


I too can post evemails...


On the off chance these mails are legit though wow... I actually didn't realise people paid you so often. Scamming clearly is the easy money game.
Eryn Velasquez
#11 - 2012-05-06 13:23:12 UTC
LolLolLol

Einstein was absof*ckinlutely right:

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."

_“A man's freedom consists in his being able to do whatever he wills, but that he should not, by any human power, be forced to do what is against his will.” ― Jean-Jacques Rousseau _
SionPhion
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#12 - 2012-05-06 15:01:02 UTC
Funny thing is I actually send mushroom isk and he doubled it for me lol
jimmyjam
Fire Mandrill
#13 - 2012-05-07 01:44:15 UTC
Best thread I've. Seen for a while. Will read again
Eugene Kerner
TunDraGon
Goonswarm Federation
#14 - 2012-05-07 07:24:50 UTC
Thank you so much for doubeling my joy this morning.

TunDraGon is recruiting! "Also, your boobs [:o] "   CCP Eterne, 2012 "When in doubt...make a diȼk joke." Robin Williams - RIP
Daemon Ceed
Ice Fire Warriors
#15 - 2012-05-07 23:45:11 UTC
On the behalf of C&P, we appreciate your efforts to defund the simpleminded genetic throwaways.
Jint Hikaru
OffWorld Exploration Inc
#16 - 2012-05-08 12:34:27 UTC
Quote:
[06:31:03] Josma Meric > if you had any idea who you were dealing with at this very moment
[06:31:17] Josma Meric > you would have **** yourself multiple times


Haha,

Thanks for the entertainment Mushroom Hed.

Jint Hikaru - Miner / Salvager / Explorer / SpaceBum In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
Blobber NL
Deep Core Mining Inc.
Caldari State
#17 - 2012-05-08 12:47:46 UTC
I can't believe how stupid people are..

I wonder if they gave thier money that easy away in real life?
Pinstar Colton
Sweet Asteroid Acres
#18 - 2012-05-08 13:28:51 UTC
Blobber NL wrote:
I can't believe how stupid people are..

I wonder if they gave thier money that easy away in real life?


The % of the population in EVE gullible enough to fall for such scams is probably similar to those who would fall for it IRL.

The most creative one I've seen is the "I'm done, I'm leaving EVE. Here is all my ISK for one Trit to anyone who wants it" linking to a contract that has you BUYing 1 trit for 600+ million isk.


And of course, the shipless ship contracts in Rens are always fun. I remember setting up a ship contract that actually contained the ship I was advertising and Rens local was dumbfounded that an actual legitimate sale was being advertised :D

In the cat-and-mouse game that is low sec, there is no shame in learning to be a better mouse.

Pinstar Colton
Sweet Asteroid Acres
#19 - 2012-05-08 13:30:22 UTC
Eugene Kerner wrote:
Thank you so much for doubeling my joy this morning.


The fun has been doubled!

In the cat-and-mouse game that is low sec, there is no shame in learning to be a better mouse.

Five Thirty
School of Applied Knowledge
Caldari State
#20 - 2012-05-08 15:43:58 UTC
Pinstar Colton wrote:

The % of the population in EVE gullible enough to fall for such scams is probably similar to those who would fall for it IRL.


Would be easy money... except that it's illegal. :(
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