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Social anxiety

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ISD Ezwal
ISD Community Communications Liaisons
ISD Alliance
#21 - 2015-04-18 19:13:40 UTC  |  Edited by: ISD Ezwal
I have removed some rule breaking posts and those quoting them. Please people, keep it on topic and above all civil!

The Rules:
2. Be respectful toward others at all times.

The purpose of the EVE Online forums is to provide a platform for exchange of ideas, and a venue for the discussion of EVE Online. Occasionally there will be conflicts that arise when people voice opinions. Forum users are expected to be courteous when disagreeing with others.

4. Personal attacks are prohibited.

Commonly known as flaming, personal attacks are posts that are designed to personally berate or insult another forum user. Posts of this nature are not beneficial to the community spirit that CCP promote and as such they will not be tolerated.

5. Trolling is prohibited.

Trolling is a defined as a post that is deliberately designed for the purpose of angering and insulting other players in an attempt to incite retaliation or an emotional response. Posts of this nature are disruptive, often abusive and do not contribute to the sense of community that CCP promote.

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Off-topic posting is permitted within reason, as sometimes a single comment may color or lighten the tone of discussion. However, excessive posting of off-topic remarks in an attempt to derail a thread may result in the thread being locked, or a forum warning being issued to the off-topic poster.


Thread reopened.

ISD Ezwal Community Communication Liaisons (CCLs)
Mortimer Divinitas
Doomheim
#22 - 2015-04-18 20:03:53 UTC
Zoe Athame wrote:
Mortimer Divinitas wrote:

every game I play I play solo. Star wars old republic, elder scrolls online etc.


Maybe you should stop playing MASSIVELY MULTIPLAYER games?

Like 99% of video games are single player. They aren't hard to find.


I do play single player games, but I don't recall there being a single player console eve.
Sibyyl
Garoun Investment Bank
Gallente Federation
#23 - 2015-04-18 20:25:03 UTC

I don't have social anxiety per se but I think I have physical anxiety.. it is possible for me to injure or bruise myself without me realizing it all, so if I don't pay attention, my quality of life might go down pretty quickly. Over the years I've adopted a lot of routine that other people might perceive as being tedious and annoying (for example I like to run a visual check of my extremities every 15-20 minutes I'm awake) but I feel that what other people think may not be so important.. and it's more important for me to live healthy.

I feel that I can get along with others quite easily, so when you talk about your social anxiety I might not fully be able to empathize with how you feel in your head. However, I think I can understand what it feels like to be different and separated, to feel isolated even when you are inside a big group of people.

Corporations are large groups of people, and in any large group you will have bad apples who might ruin an otherwise good social experience. I think the best way to deal with isolation and anxiety is having a friend. I don't mean a large group of friends but a select few, maybe even just one friend, who understand you and will not judge you.



Joffy Aulx-Gao for CSM. Fix links and OGB. Ban stabs from plexes. Fulfill karmic justice.
Steve Ronuken
Fuzzwork Enterprises
Vote Steve Ronuken for CSM
#24 - 2015-04-18 20:29:13 UTC  |  Edited by: Steve Ronuken
There's socialising, and then there's socialising.

What you could try, at first, is one of the NPSI roams. Or hang out in one of the 'chat' channels in game. There are often regional ones, or ones like Eve Radio.

That gives you a low impact social group, that you can opt out of, without any real impact (thus, low guilt for doing so.)

A degree of social anxiety isn't uncommon in this kind of game. It's all about managing it Smile

It's not about Eve, but it may be of use/interest.
http://www.reddit.com/r/Guildwars2/comments/21ysgf/helpdiscussion_should_i_just_give_up_on_this_game/
https://www.reddit.com/r/socialanxiety/comments/2reero/how_do_you_make_friends_in_an_mmo/


Edit:

I /loathe/ having people depending on me, and having to depend on other people. So, in my game play, I tend to go solo. (Yes, I know this sounds weird, coming from someone who put himself forward to the CSM position. But I /could/ walk away from it. knowing I can, means I don't have to.)

Woo! CSM XI!

Fuzzwork Enterprises

Twitter: @fuzzysteve on Twitter
Ovv Topik
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#25 - 2015-04-18 22:36:39 UTC
OP: You might like to try your hand at Solo PvP. No voice comms needed. You dont need to join a corp. But loads of text chat.

You have no doubt heard the advise: "Just get into low sec, and start losing Rifters/Atrons/whatever.

Offer a 'GF' when you inevitably lose at first, and you win invariably have a brief and friendly conversation about the fight with your opponent.

Before long you will start to make some friends and acquaintances, and will start to get regular 'o/' when you enter a system.

Very light and comfortable social interaction.

And don't apologize bro. Lots of us are more 'Boba Fett' than 'Han solo'.

o7

"Nicknack, I'm in a shoe in space, on my computer, in my house, with a cup of coffee, in't that something." - Fly Safe PopPaddi. o7

ISD Ezwal
ISD Community Communications Liaisons
ISD Alliance
#26 - 2015-04-18 22:54:16 UTC
I have removed a rule breaking post.

The Rules:
12. Discussion of forum moderation is prohibited.

The discussion of EVE Online forum moderation actions generally leads to flaming, trolling and baiting of our ISD CCL moderators. As such, this type of discussion is strictly prohibited under the forum rules. If you have questions regarding the actions of a moderator, please file a support ticket under the Community & Forums Category.

ISD Ezwal Community Communication Liaisons (CCLs)
Borat Guereen
Doomheim
#27 - 2015-04-18 23:06:11 UTC
There is nothing wrong with playing solo. If an agenda can help, and you like ours, contact me Big smile

Candidate for CSM XII
Ragori Mitternacht
Republic Military School
Minmatar Republic
#28 - 2015-04-19 00:00:15 UTC
Social anxiety is an interesting thing. I for one do suffer from it and I have problems dealing with it. I have problems dealing with large crowds of people I tend to get very hostile if I am stuck in a crowd. I have had security and police called on me many times just because I scare so many people when I am starting to stress out.

Now then when it came to games I played solo games rarely interacting just because I was a shy person I never started interacting with other players till I started playing Halo 3 in a college community room then I branched out into a few other games WoW was one but I regretted that choice I made some good friends playing CoD Ghosts and Black Ops 1 &2. However I have really made strong friends when I started to play Destiny and EVE. Yes I am still shy and my alliance knows I do not talk much though I do have fun at times when those I count as friends are on but most of the time I am very quiet.

So yes Social anxiety sucks but I have found it easier to make friends and hang out with others in EVE than anywhere else just because we are all here for the same reason. To play a great game and have fun and leave the real world crap outside of the game.

So no I don't think you are pathetic for asking or making that post to be honest I am glad to know I am not the only one to suffer that problem.

heh let me put it this way I suck at pvp and my friends here know that but they put up with me when I come on the roams with them but the things I can do they appreciate and while I know at times I can be annoying they still help me. They don't push me to do things I am not interested in at the time and they offer help as I try and help them when they ask me.

I will say this I had a couple rookie pilots ask me for help when it comes to certain plans they had and that was the first time I had ever been asked to help teach another pilot. It was a very cool moment for me. and while I was very nervous and stressing trying to help in the end I was able to help them figure out what they needed to do.

I have experienced some things playing EVE that I never thought I would get to. Making some awesome friendships and being part of something as well as teaching others and helping my fellow pilots rather than just being a 5th wheel.
Mike Azariah
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#29 - 2015-04-19 17:45:28 UTC
Eve is a huge community. There are all types in here, including those with social or physical limitations.

Reaching out, as you did, was a GREAT first step. The advice to hang in some casual channels is also good, heck even the 'Help' channel is a nice place to watch the conversation flow by with no obligation to take part, yourself.

npsi, channels made for specific pve activities even local (if you are not in a trade hub) have conversations and regulars.

do what works for you, what you are comfortable with but once or twice . . . .try the edges

m

Mike Azariah  ┬──┬ ¯|(ツ)/¯
ergherhdfgh
Imperial Academy
Amarr Empire
#30 - 2015-04-19 18:32:25 UTC
If you are fine with not socailizing then just stay solo. If you would like to socailize but feel uncomfortable doing so then slowly work into it. With most things in life if you cater to it then it will get worse. So push yourself a little but not too much and when you get comfortable with that then go a little further next time. If you go a little too far then back up.

I live near chicago and I have known several people through out the years that have moved to warmer climates because they did not like being cold. Those people wind up wearing jackets when it's 70 degrees outside and complaining how cold it is. On the other hand the people that I know around here that run around outside in the fall in T-shirts when they should probably be wearing a jacket don't seem to ever get cold all winter or at least I don't hear them talk about it.

Want to talk? Join Cara's channel in game: House Forelli
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