In-Game Events and Gatherings

***Edited for a slightly cleaner joke***

Along time ago in a Galaxy far far away its Christmas time.

Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are having a lightsaber battle.

Darth Vader says to Luke " I know what your getting for Christmas"

Luke says "eh?"

Darth Vader says again to Luke " I know what your getting for Christmas"

Luke says " how would you know that?"

Darth Vader says " I felt your presence"

Q: How do you transform a cat into a cow?
A: You probably just have to marry her

What does a blonde and a screen door have in common?

The more you bang them, the looser they get.

An English, Irish, Scots, German, Australian, Italian, Chinese, Korean and a Vietnamese man walk into a bar.
The barman says " Sorry guys, I cant let you in here without a Thai.

How many tickles do you need to make a squid laugh?
Ten-tickles.

A man walks into a bar and sees a horse crying over at a table. The man then belly's up and asks the bar tender whats wrong with the horse. "Well we can't get him to stop crying, so whoever does get him to stop crying wins this bucket of cash" The man accepts the challenge and walks over to the horse. He whispers something in the horse's ear and the horse breaks into an uncontrolable belly laugh. The man walks up to the bar and grabs the bucket of cash and leaves. A month goes by, and the man happens to stop into this bar again and notices that the horse is still laughing. The man sees that there is another bucket of cash. "Whats the cash for this time?" asked the man. "Well you got him laughing, and now we are trying to get him to stop, so whoever gets him to stop laughing will get this bucket of cash." The man thought for a moment and accepted the challenge. He walked over to the horse and whispers something in his ear , and the horse breaks down crying. The man walks up to the bar and grabs the cash bucket and starts for the door when the bar tender stopped him and asked "Say freind, what did you say to that horse?" The man gave a slight grin and replied "Well the first time I told him I was hung longer than a horse. This time I proved it".

how many devs does it take to change a light bulb?

all of them

1 to hold the bulb the rest of them to turn the building

Q. What's the difference between a duck?

A. One of it's legs are both the same.

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.

There are four passengers on a transport warping across a large solar system, a Gallentean male, a pretty young Caldari girl, an ugly old Minmatar woman and an Amarr male.

The transport passes close by a planet which blocks the light from the sun for a few seconds. From the darkness comes the sound of a loud slap and when the ship emerges back into the light the Gallentean is rubbing his face which now bears a large red mark on the cheek.

The old Minmatar woman thinks, "I bet that randy Gallentean man fondled the Caldari girl in the dark and got a slap for it."

The pretty young Caldari girl thinks, "I bet the Gallentean tried to fondle me but got that ugly Minmatar woman by mistake and she slapped him."

The Gallentean thinks, "I bet that dirty old Amarr fondled the Caldari girl but she thought it was me and hit me."

The Amarr thinks, "I hope we pass another planet soon so I can slap that Gallentean smug git again."