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Crime & Punishment

 
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We are going to hell. All of us.

Author
Axel Greye
Unlikely Suspects
#1 - 2011-11-27 03:52:54 UTC
And thus we damned our souls.

When a young confident but hopelessly naive pilot asked to join our ranks, boasting of his 3.5bil Golem, we accepted him gladly into our bosom, and invited him to join us in a good old level 4 mission.
he promptly came out, and rushed to our side, where we hastily granted him the role of starbase equiptment manager (accident insurance) and proceeded to relieve him of his Golem by means of forced ejection and pod destruction.
revelling in the spoils of our skullduggery, the young member seemed to be taking things rather well. He asked if this could serve as his trial for joining the corp.

seeing possibility for further skullduggery but not quite being in the mood to relieve him of his caracal, we told him his golem had been jump freightered into our nullsec POS, located in Russian Sov Nullsec.

The young trusting trooper proceeds to make his way deep into the heart of nullsec with his trusty caracal, whilst we flaunt his mighty golem back in the comfy realms of Dodixie.

Upon arrival in said 0.0 system (which we did NOT expect), we mentioned that he should launch his probes to find our Wormhole.
"you did bring probes right?"

So our little trooper goes the 25 jumps back to highsec, to pickup a probe capable ship, and proceeds to make the entire journey all over again. Although dying this time.

But oh no, our man is determined to see his golem again! he attempts the voyage a third time, this time making it back to nullsec with a prober and an Iron Will of determination. He probes every signature in the system and finally, finds his prize, the wormhole.

...which happens to be a highsec bridge that takes him to within 4 jumps of Dodixie.

.....At which point his 24 hours of Starbase equiptment manager is up, and we promptly remove him from our corp and wish him on his merry way.



On reflection, I almost feel bad for him. But then I remember this is Eve, and say Time well spent.

See you all in hell. Cool
KrakizBad
Section 8.
#2 - 2011-11-27 04:33:38 UTC
That is some epic griefing. I salute you sir!
Zions Child
Higashikata Industries
#3 - 2011-11-27 05:04:27 UTC
I... I love you. This is wonderful.
Zedrik Cayne
Standards and Practices
#4 - 2011-11-27 05:32:54 UTC
I approve of this product or service...

That is a 24 hour epic.

I honestly feel like I just read fifty shades of dumb. --CCP Falcon

Jiska Ensa
Estrale Frontiers
#5 - 2011-11-27 05:44:32 UTC
Axel Greye wrote:


...Upon arrival in said 0.0 system (which we did NOT expect)...

...finds his prize, the wormhole.
...which happens to be a highsec bridge that takes him to within 4 jumps of Dodixie.



Clearly, the eve-gods wanted him to have his Golem back. Now that you've defied their wishes, you will indeed burn forever in Eve-hell (also known as Providence)
Gerrick Palivorn
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#6 - 2011-11-27 05:47:28 UTC
Keep up the good work! Loved the story

MMOs come and go, but Eve remains.  -Garresh-

Berendas
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#7 - 2011-11-27 05:50:48 UTC
Well done, the narration was almost as good as the content Twisted
Angry Onions
League of Angered Gentlemen
#8 - 2011-11-27 05:58:35 UTC
You sir, have can-flipped my heart, I salute you. I am speechless.

S H I T P O S T I N G

Russell Casey
Doomheim
#9 - 2011-11-27 05:59:40 UTC
You should be afraid. If he was willing to go through all that just to join, imagine what he'll do to get revenge. Twisted
I likegirls
The Terrifying League Of Dog Fort
Deepwater Hooligans
#10 - 2011-11-27 06:04:10 UTC
Why did you boot him? You could have probably kept that going for another day or two with how stupid he was.
JitaJane
Science and Trade Institute
Caldari State
#11 - 2011-11-27 07:31:16 UTC
Junior showed a ToN of heart (if maybe not so much brains) I'd certainly fly with him.

90% of of the time my posts are about something I actually find interesting and want to learn more about. Do not be alarmed.

Molly Molotov
Doomheim
#12 - 2011-11-27 07:55:06 UTC
JitaJane wrote:
Junior showed a ToN of heart (if maybe not so much brains) I'd certainly fly with him.


Alas, his little heart 'twas broken and he is now a jaded, spiteful shell of his former self.
Nathan Jameson
Grumpy Bastards
#13 - 2011-11-27 08:11:56 UTC
JitaJane wrote:
Junior showed a ToN of heart (if maybe not so much brains) I'd certainly fly with him.


In my experience, heart is rather easy to come by in this game. Not so much good sense.

http://www.wormholes.info

Lady Spank
Get Out Nasty Face
#14 - 2011-11-27 09:30:47 UTC
Thats pretty funny, esp the wormhole pointing him back to Dodixie of course!

To be honest, considering his attitude and the fact that his willingness led to such an amusing turn of events, I'd be inclined to return the Golem for having such a good attitude towards EVE :P

(ಠ_ృ) ~ It Takes a Million Years to Become Diamonds So Lets Just Burn Like Coal Until the Sky's Black ~ (ಠ_ృ)

Axel Greye
Unlikely Suspects
#15 - 2011-11-27 14:16:38 UTC
Lady Spank wrote:
Thats pretty funny, esp the wormhole pointing him back to Dodixie of course!

To be honest, considering his attitude and the fact that his willingness led to such an amusing turn of events, I'd be inclined to return the Golem for having such a good attitude towards EVE :P


He was a trooper alright, but a gullible sod. we figured this was grounds enough for teaching him the true nature of the game and that we were in fact doing him a service. ;)
Tora Oni
Legendary Sidekicks in Space
#16 - 2011-11-27 17:12:27 UTC
He knows where to find you at dodixie Big smile ... where you always are. Might get a nice WD out of it....more PVP, lucky basterds ! Twisted
Da Banker
De Bank
#17 - 2011-11-27 21:22:56 UTC
Awww you made a lil boy cry.

You're such rockstars!!!

And you made a post about, super cool!!!

Did your moms give you a cookie for this one? I hope so you truely and surely earned it.
Ammzi
Dreddit
Test Alliance Please Ignore
#18 - 2011-11-27 21:49:42 UTC
Props to one loyal bastard.
If he was really sincere about this you just lost one dedicated pilot.
Azelor Delaria
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#19 - 2011-11-27 22:00:04 UTC
Ammzi wrote:
Props to one loyal bastard.
If he was really sincere about this you just lost one dedicated pilot.


THIS IS WHAT I ******* SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I told you I wasn't crazy on this one, Axel...!
Axel Greye
Unlikely Suspects
#20 - 2011-11-27 22:07:13 UTC
Azelor Delaria wrote:
Ammzi wrote:
Props to one loyal bastard.
If he was really sincere about this you just lost one dedicated pilot.


THIS IS WHAT I ******* SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I told you I wasn't crazy on this one, Axel...!

I know, I just like being a bastard every once in a while. Big smile
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