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Crime & Punishment

 
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The Pirate Story Thread

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Praxis Ginimic
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#741 - 2013-07-03 02:42:48 UTC
I had the same experience a few weeks ago in low sec. I caught a buzzard in a relic site. After some agreeable extortion I unlocked and he went right back to hacking the can.
I went back to station and gave the bm to a corpy who gladly scooped up a 1 shot kill with a frigat.
Jet Maniac
uW0T M8
#742 - 2013-07-03 17:00:41 UTC
BuzzyBeagle wrote:
So i was AFK jetcan mining in a BattleHulk hoping a greedy little canflipper would try me on for size. I had innocent looking mining drones doing the work for me so it looked like i was totally bearing it up, by not having combat drones.
I mined about 10 minutes dumping ore in a can sitting next to me when a Rifter flies in and goes red.
I target/insta warp/scramble and follow.
I pull in mining drones and release Hobgoblin 2's

The following ensues.

[ 2011.08.05 17:21:02] BuzzyBeagle > hello there
[ 2011.08.05 17:21:12] victim > WTF?
[ 2011.08.05 17:21:18] BuzzyBeagle > you have commited a crime.
[ 2011.08.05 17:21:24] victim > what kind of noob miner has a point and web on a HULK?
....



Holy s**(, you're my hero :D
Jaxiar
#743 - 2013-07-03 23:23:15 UTC
Not a Yarr story, but I feel the need to tell it anyway as it brings me great joy, and it almost just happened.

BACKSTORY: A couple of days ago I was being afk outside of amarr in my glorious tornado class battlecruiser, while watching a humorous on TV I think it was.
Anyway, Im going off topic, I come back to a notification from Concord, stating a certain individual has wronged my glorious tornado.
Even if I didnt have any tank modules of any kind I was at both 100% armor and 100% shields.. Odd I think, but "I will not stand for this!" I yell so everyone in all of EVE could hear it.

The day goes on as my network of agents able to locate this individual tells me where he is on a steady basis, meanwhile Im having my innocent alt-buddy fly around looking for him to see what hes up to.

I notice a pattern in his movements, he keeps going from the same lowsec pocket to Amarr. AHA! I think to myself "Ill catch him on his route!"
So I set up, but he logs off. Damn! Another day then, this did not demotivate me, its only been a day and I have a pretty good idea of how to get him, not bad I think.
Fast forward to the next day, I talk to my network of agents, they locate him in an area he hadnt been in the other day, but its not too far away from where he seemed to live so its not out of the ordinary.
A quick look at the map and I notice he only has 1 way back to his home, unless he plans to go on vacation in while doing some 50+ jumps instead of the fast route of far fewer. I decide to try my luck, my alt-buddy sets off for his destination and I set myself up 1 system out in my trusty Vigilant on a small gate thats easy to camp.
Some time passes, I decide to do a quick refit in system and click warp, BUT OH DAMN HE JUST UNDOCKED AND I JUST INITIATED A 100 AU WARP! Damnit! Hes in a scimitar, its fairly quick to warp.. Damnit yet again.
The criminal got away.. For now.. I actually even lost him completely, but I have friends, the agents were set to work again. They find him in Dodixie, its sorta far, and I have actually never been to Dodixie before, but Ive heard of the place.
I set off yet again, find a suitable place to catch him when/if he comes back and my alt-buddy goes all the way to Dodixie.
My alt-buddy finds he is docked, not to worry! I have all the time I need my friend.
Fast forward 2 hours where I had the window minimized and did other things on my PC, but Id be able to see him appear on the overview out on the side of my PC screen. Hes still docked, bah, another day I think to myself.
Fast forward to the evening, I decided it was time for EVE, I expected him to be logged off, cause it was quite past the time he logged the day before.. But wait, hes still online? And hes not in dodixie anymore either.. Hmm, agents get to work! I say.
They find him in Olelon, a quick glance tells me its in a constellation where Kuvakei Sansha is raiding the systems..
Surely not?
But yes, he was there to help get rid of the Sansha invasion.. Now, as much as I hate the Sansha, I hate this guy even more, for I have been told by Concord (who are very reliable) that this person has tried to do me harm. So, I show him why you dont agress people in highsec and even if its not very impressive, I killed his pod aswell.
Liam Inkuras
Furnace
#744 - 2013-07-04 18:19:06 UTC
Awesome write up, good to see that justice is being brought to miscreants

I wear my goggles at night.

Any spelling/grammatical errors come complimentary with my typing on a phone
Nuglord
GoonWaffe
Goonswarm Federation
#745 - 2013-07-10 03:01:51 UTC
I stole 15b in assets from a wormhole corporation.

Wasn't a super exciting story, I got intel that a C3 wormhole corporation was accepting nearly anyone and had lots of shiny stuff in public hangar of all places. Of course I immediately app'd and was accepted the next day. I spent 3 days waiting for a good opportunity/debating putting up a POS in system to make moving ships easier, but eventually decided to make a move randomly one night about 4 hours before downtime as the CEO was the last person online, and was kind enough to roll us a fresh hole right before he went to sleep, so we'd have the maximum amount of time to get things out.

My accomplice and I waited until the CEO had logged, and the only person left online was AFK in the POS in his Loki. We immediately scanned a lowsec exit and prepared to begin moving as many ships as we could out of the hole as quickly as possible (hauling whatever we could grab out of public assets in the cargohold).

Literally one trip, and a corp mate logged on. We thought for sure we were busted. Luckily for us, the guy literally only logged on long enough to do one or two directional scans, and ask in corporation chat "whose heron is that" (we had placed an alt in system to assist in flying out ships we weren't capable of and provide an additional scanner in case the hole closed). He then logged off, and we continued.

About two hours into the operation, another corporation member logged on - the AU TZ recruiter, who had the CEO's RL phone number. At this point we were trying to decide whether it would be best to feign ignorance or just get as much out as we could before the guy did something to stop us, since most of the more expensive hulls had already been moved out (there was still another 5-6b left in t2 cruisers, and t1 battlecruisers and battleships. We gave it a few minutes, and as surprisingly unaware as we were hoping he was, the dude starts doing math homework, in the midst of the heist!

For about 30 minutes, we were still flying ships out with a corporate member active within 3km of the ship hangar array. We were even stealing some of his ships! Then, as quickly as he had come, he logged off, leaving us free to grab the last of the t2 cruisers, finish with the t3's, and move on to the battleships. After that, I positioned myself to start bumping ships out that we couldn't fly ourselves. I jettisoned the first Onyx, and sure enough, as I'm hitting ramming speed in my Talos, the very same AU TZ recruiter logs back on on his alt, and lands right next to me in the POS.

Luckily, I was able to turn at the last possible second, and ram into one of the ship hangar arrays, effectively neutralizing my bump. I figured the situation was pretty obvious at this point, and was considering bumping it out anyway as we had most of the loot already. But much to my gracious surprise, he hadn't caught on to what was actually happening, despite his suspicions. The conversation went something like this:

Dude: "What's up with the Onyx?"
Me: "idk someone left it out, i'd put it away but i can't fly it lol"
Dude: "oh"

And he logs off again. A few quick bumps later, we had half a dozen recons and heavy interdictors secured in lowsec. We started snatching drakes, but eventually there wasn't a whole lot left except for some unfit battlecruisers and scraps, so we called it quits. I moved the loot over the next few days to Rens, then Jita.

As for tears, they threatened to fill freighters with our bodies and park them outside our home station. After the operation ended, suspicion was cast on my accomplice, resulting in his half being withheld, since I had all the stuff anyway.

TL;DR: noob c3 wormhole corp stored all their **** in pub hangar and i stole it
Praxis Ginimic
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#746 - 2013-07-15 03:08:05 UTC
This one was fun

Not too long ago I was out for some solo and found this guy. Pay no attention to the kill whoring d-bag.

Then I see him closer to home yesterday in an ares & ask if he wants a rematch. He wanted assurances that it would be fair so I fleeted him. He didn't believe when I told him that as a criminal he could engage me without taking a sec hit so I sent him a duel request too. As though I wouldn't engage first. Then I get to a deep safe and tell him to warp to me.

So after all that trouble to make sure the fight would me fair he initiates warp... then asks me what I'm flying.
Feyd Rautha Harkonnen
Doomheim
#747 - 2013-07-15 16:03:03 UTC
Busy weekend...

First there was a failure to communicate

Would you like to know more?
Feyd Rautha Harkonnen
Doomheim
#748 - 2013-07-15 16:04:04 UTC
...then there was a minor Micro Jump Drive educational session

Would you like to know more?
Bronto Scorpio
#749 - 2013-07-15 17:01:02 UTC
Ok, so this isn't really a pirate story, even though it has massive rage, tears, and lulz, and I wasn't going to post it, until I logged in today and saw a lulzy contact notification, so here it is.

The story of THE RAGER and his Mighty Armor Rattlesnake

So I log in to get my standings up farming missions so I can join FW and pseudo-yarr, when two fellow NPC corpies start talking about mission pimp ships, one of them, who shall be referred to as THE RAGER for the rest of this story mentions his rattlesnake.

[ 2013.07.14 16:14:10 ] Corpie 1 > THE RAGER - You fly a Rattlesnake?
[ 2013.07.14 16:14:13 ] THE RAGER > yea#
[ 2013.07.14 16:14:28 ] Corpie 1 > pve?
[ 2013.07.14 16:14:32 ] THE RAGER > yup
[ 2013.07.14 16:14:39 ] THE RAGER > always
[ 2013.07.14 16:14:45 ] Corpie 1 > You mind to share your fitting?
[ 2013.07.14 16:14:52 ] THE RAGER > hang on Corpie 1
[ 2013.07.14 16:14:59 ] Corpie 1 > k
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:04 ] THE RAGER > XT-110A* atm


*This was obviously in-game drag and drop fit so here is the EFT format:

[Rattlesnake, XT-110A]
Shield Power Relay II
Shield Power Relay II
Shield Power Relay II
Shield Power Relay II
Shield Power Relay II
Large Armor Repairer II

Large Shield Extender II
Large Shield Extender II
Adaptive Invulnerability Field I
Shield Recharger II
Shield Recharger II
Shield Recharger II
Shield Recharger II

'Arbalest' Cruise Launcher I, Mjolnir Cruise Missile
'Arbalest' Cruise Launcher I, Mjolnir Cruise Missile
'Arbalest' Cruise Launcher I, Mjolnir Cruise Missile
'Arbalest' Cruise Launcher I, Mjolnir Cruise Missile
Small Tractor Beam I
Small Tractor Beam I

Large Core Defense Field Purger I
Large Core Defense Field Purger I
Large Core Defense Field Purger I


Ogre I x10
Mining Drone I x5
Salvage Drone I x5


I look at fit fit, being curious and notice the low-slot, wondering if there is a genuine reason for it or he is simply misguided, I ask him.

[ 2013.07.14 16:15:04 ] THE RAGER > XT-110A atm
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:17 ] THE RAGER > could get a Target Spectrum Breaker instead of a Large Shield Extender II tho
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:30 ] Bronto Scorpio > LAR2 on rattlesnake?
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:34 ] Corpie 2 > LOL
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:37 ] THE RAGER > what
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:40 ] Corpie 2 > that armor repper
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:40 ] THE RAGER > get over it bronto
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:42 ] Corpie 3 > hahahaa
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:55 ] Bronto Scorpio > lol get over it? it was a question,, umad
[ 2013.07.14 16:15:58 ] THE RAGER > every single ship i have every flown i have a repair on!
[ 2013.07.14 16:16:10 ] THE RAGER > an armour repair on...every single ship
[ 2013.07.14 16:16:15 ] Corpie 1 > moentarely I fly a Golem and CNR
[ 2013.07.14 16:16:21 ] THE RAGER > gratz
[ 2013.07.14 16:16:30 ] Corpie 1 > next ship would be a Rattle
[ 2013.07.14 16:16:30 ] Corpie 3 > if i put a bounty on THE RAGER will it send me a mail when that s**t box goes down?


At this point the conversation takes a sudden, and hilarious, turn.

[ 2013.07.14 16:16:51 ] THE RAGER > WHAT THE F**K ARE YOU?! YOU STUPID DISGUSTING SL*T!
[ 2013.07.14 16:16:54 ] Corpie 2 > can we get enough ppl in catalysts and gank him?
[ 2013.07.14 16:16:59 ] Bronto Scorpio > hopefully
[ 2013.07.14 16:17:02 ] Corpie 2 > and here we go again :D


[ 2013.07.14 16:17:25 ] THE RAGER > well done **** up!
[ 2013.07.14 16:17:45 ] THE RAGER > IF my shield happend to get broken atleast i have an armour rep. every ship needs 1.


[ 2013.07.14 16:18:17 ] Corpie 3> oh yea that armor repairer will be your saving grace, your unkillable now
[ 2013.07.14 16:18:31 ] THE RAGER > that stupid **** deserves to get raped, get cervical cancer... and rot from inside!


At this point I hop on the IGB to look at his battleclinic killboard for teh lulz, and what do I find?
Him in a Stealth Bomber and an associate of his in a Cynabal, killing a minmatar shuttle, now I don't care about the backstory of that particular KM, it was lol enough to link into corp that to provide more rage

[ 2013.07.14 16:18:36 ] Bronto Scorpio > http://eve.battleclinic.com/killboard/(Unsure if I'm allowed to link KMs)
[ 2013.07.14 16:19:01 ] Corpie 1 > nice fitting:p

[ 2013.07.14 16:19:08 ] THE RAGER > you ignorant **** shooting a shuttle!
[ 2013.07.14 16:19:17 ] Bronto Scorpio > with a SB and cynabal lmao
[ 2013.07.14 16:19:22 ] Corpie 4 > why swear?
[ 2013.07.14 16:19:25 ] Corpie 1 > lol, well it's still a game
[ 2013.07.14 16:19:33 ] THE RAGER > think so chrit
[ 2013.07.14 16:19:37 ] Corpie 5 > yes chri

Trolling through his KB for more lulz I found another gem:
It consisted of him losing a T1M0 fit Malediction to a rifter

[ 2013.07.14 16:19:55 ] Bronto Scorpio > oh that isnt as good as this
[ 2013.07.14 16:19:57 ] THE RAGER > what is this? i dont remember shooting anyone
[ 2013.07.14 16:20:00 ] Bronto Scorpio > KM LINK
[ 2013.07.14 16:20:02 ] Corpie 4 > THE RAGER I think you can put damange module instead of your armor repairer and put on medium this : Large Micro Jump Drive to save you ass
[ 2013.07.14 16:20:27 ] THE RAGER > save me from what?
[ 2013.07.14 16:20:30 ] Corpie 2 > damn he deserves some bounty


On the bounty note, he eventually went from having 0 ISK bounty at time of linking the fit, to ~600m bounty 20 minutes later.
Bronto Scorpio
#750 - 2013-07-15 17:01:34 UTC  |  Edited by: Bronto Scorpio
At this point Corpie 1 links a CNR fit, and someone Cool remarks he can't use it.

[ 2013.07.14 16:20:34 ] Corpie 1 > ⊕ CR for you, THE RAGER:)
[ 2013.07.14 16:20:37 ] THE RAGER > you are a paki bomber and i don't like you! leave me alone.
[ 2013.07.14 16:20:51 ] THE RAGER > i dont want a raven tbh but thanks
[ 2013.07.14 16:20:56 ] Bronto Scorpio > he cant use that
[ 2013.07.14 16:21:00 ] Bronto Scorpio > it doesnt have an armor repper
[ 2013.07.14 16:21:01 ] Corpie 1> this thing burns through missions like butter
[ 2013.07.14 16:21:02 ] Corpie 4 > thats a crazy tank
[ 2013.07.14 16:21:03 ] THE RAGER > unless you are giving it away.
[ 2013.07.14 16:21:07 ] Bronto Scorpio > "every ship needs atleast1"
[ 2013.07.14 16:21:15 ] THE RAGER > i didnt say atleast 1
[ 2013.07.14 16:21:17 ] THE RAGER > i said every ship needs 1

At this point the corpchat turns into discussions regarding Ice mining returns to afford CNR fits

However, it appears Corpie 3, lolbountys him

[ 2013.07.14 16:28:23 ] Corpie 4> But the ice belt disapear too fast
[ 2013.07.14 16:28:29 ] Corpie 1> are you dutch Hidwulf?
[ 2013.07.14 16:28:34 ] Corpie 4> nop
[ 2013.07.14 16:28:37 ] Corpie 1> ok:p
[ 2013.07.14 16:28:48 ] Corpie 4> lol
[ 2013.07.14 16:29:26 ] THE RAGER > WHAT IS THIS IGNORANT **** DOING?! putting bounty on me.
[ 2013.07.14 16:29:43 ] Corpie 4> you have so many bounty on you =)


[ 2013.07.14 16:30:14 ] Corpie 4> Corpie 1 can't says the same I have to go lowsec to find ice and it's not safe at all =)
[ 2013.07.14 16:30:15 ] THE RAGER > find that stupid **** Corpie 3, skin her alive, split her open! GUT HER WITH A SAW AND DROWN HER IN ACID!
[ 2013.07.14 16:30:29 ] Corpie 1> nah...it's a 0.5 sec system
[ 2013.07.14 16:30:40 ] Corpie 3> what? i didnt bounty anyone
[ 2013.07.14 16:30:41 ] Corpie 4> you're lucky !


[ 2013.07.14 16:31:17 ] THE RAGER > you had your chance you *****! Corpie 3!
[ 2013.07.14 16:31:19 ] Corpie 4> lol ...
[ 2013.07.14 16:31:24 ] THE RAGER > you are going to die!
[ 2013.07.14 16:31:40 ] THE RAGER > and i will laugh as you rot from your cervical cancer
[ 2013.07.14 16:31:41 ] Corpie 3> how am i gonna die?
[ 2013.07.14 16:31:47 ] Random corpie > THE RAGER needs some treatment...
[ 2013.07.14 16:31:55 ] Corpie 4> hug ?

[ 2013.07.14 16:31:59 ] random corpie > Either the end of world or cancer by what I hear on Fox News.
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:00 ] Corpie 3> 1v1 me in your armor rattlesnake?
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:06 ] Corpie 1> THE RAGER: Reminder: it's just a game.
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:12 ] random corpie > Or by socialisim...not sure how that'll kill me but they say it will
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:16 ] THE RAGER > i dont care if its a game or not
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:21 ] THE RAGER > that ***** needs to die!
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:27 ] Corpie 5> hahahahahaha
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:34 ] Corpie 5> social issues
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:35 ] random corpie > ok.. now we have a psycho...
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:37 ] Corpie 4> maybe it's a fake girl think of it
[ 2013.07.14 16:32:40 ] Corpie 1> lol, man, just relax, you're just a magnet for trouble if you act like this:)
[ 2013.07.14 16:33:23 ] Bronto Scorpio > this is becoming moar interesting
[ 2013.07.14 16:33:32 ] random corpie > damn.. wish we could vote :/
[ 2013.07.14 16:33:39 ] Bronto Scorpio > he should duel you in his mighty armor RS

At this point he'd stopped fountaining pure lulz
*Corpie 5 logs in*

[ 2013.07.14 16:35:26 ] random corpie > so.. are we calm now?
[ 2013.07.14 16:35:34 ] Corpie 1> suddenly quiet
[ 2013.07.14 16:35:39 ] random corpie > want a cookie dear?
[ 2013.07.14 16:35:46 ] Corpie 5 > ill have a cookie
[ 2013.07.14 16:35:51 ] random corpie > ^^
[ 2013.07.14 16:36:00 ] Corpie 3 > i think he had a stroke, i put another bounty on him...
[ 2013.07.14 16:36:09 ] Corpie 5 > lol, who
[ 2013.07.14 16:36:18 ] random corpie > if i only had the money :/
[ 2013.07.14 16:36:18 ] Bronto Scorpio > the armor tanked rattlesnake guy
[ 2013.07.14 16:37:25 ] THE RAGER > no not armour tanked you fail

[ 2013.07.14 16:37:34 ] Bronto Scorpio > umad
[ 2013.07.14 16:38:02 ] THE RAGER > this disturbing little **** put another bounty on me.
[ 2013.07.14 16:38:14 ] THE RAGER > NOW FIND IT AND EXECUTE IT!
[ 2013.07.14 16:38:42 ] Corpie 1 > There are better ways to answer such behaviour
[ 2013.07.14 16:39:24 ] random corpie 2 > THE RAGER: Can I please come shoot you? We'll split the bounty :D

*I placed a bounty on him*

[ 2013.07.14 16:39:59 ] THE RAGER > bronto **** off!
[ 2013.07.14 16:40:14 ] Corpie 1 > How old are you THE RAGER?
[ 2013.07.14 16:40:24 ] Corpie 5 > 22 going on 13
[ 2013.07.14 16:40:26 ] THE RAGER > you can drown yourself random corpie 2
[ 2013.07.14 16:40:28 ] THE RAGER > i'm 22 Corpie 1.
[ 2013.07.14 16:40:34 ] Bronto Scorpio > :shock:
[ 2013.07.14 16:40:38 ] Corpie 3 > lol

At this point there is a minor side-track to discussions of my Glorious Hair portrait (not many chars left, hope I can finish)

[ 2013.07.14 16:41:26 ] Corpie 5> bronto are you an ugly mofo or just hiding, your picture is class :)
[ 2013.07.14 16:41:48 ] Bronto Scorpio > oh Im very sexy
[ 2013.07.14 16:41:51 ] Corpie 4 > she has herpes maybe
[ 2013.07.14 16:41:54 ] Bronto Scorpio > but hair portrait best portrait
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:10 ] THE RAGER > bronto you need to die aswell.
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:15 ] Bronto Scorpio > umad
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:16 ] Corpie 5 > i like it, leaves a lot to the imagination
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:26 ] THE RAGER > but i want Corpie 3 DEAD
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:27 ] random corpie 2 > Corpie 5 : Click name. Click hair. Click "View Full Body" :)
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:43 ] Corpie 5 > i forgot about that
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:51 ] THE RAGER > bronto why u hide ur face behind your hair? hmm you sh*tbag!


*sigh*, part 3
Bronto Scorpio
#751 - 2013-07-15 17:20:27 UTC  |  Edited by: Bronto Scorpio
[ 2013.07.14 16:42:51 ] THE RAGER > bronto why u hide ur face behind your hair? hmm you sh*tbag!
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:14 ] Bronto Scorpio > *drinks tears*
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:16 ] Bronto Scorpio > mmm delicious
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:24 ] Corpie 5 > bronto, i agree, id **** your char :) *agreeing with me saying I was sexy, I hope...)
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:25 ] THE RAGER > i dont cry.
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:30 ] Bronto Scorpio > shouldn't you go hull tank an abaddon or something
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:31 ] THE RAGER > especially not over something as pathetic as you!
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:41 ] Bronto Scorpio > Corpie 5 why thank you
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:42 ] THE RAGER > bronto you need to drown yourself
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:46 ] random corpie 3 > ha let that bounty get to 1 bil then split
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:54 ] random corpie 2(who was told to drown himself) > I thought that was only me?
[ 2013.07.14 16:43:56 ] THE RAGER > hum. no. F**K YOU



[ 2013.07.14 16:43:56 ] Corpie 1 > mmm. I problably better stop to act like your mommy
[ 2013.07.14 16:44:21 ] THE RAGER > Corpie 1. you are NOTHING to me! NOW **** OFF! EVERY SINGLE 1 OF YOU! USELESS C**TS!
[ 2013.07.14 16:44:37 ] Corpie 5 > do you even know what a c**t is
[ 2013.07.14 16:44:38 ] random corpie 4 > lol
[ 2013.07.14 16:44:46 ] Bronto Scorpio > Corpie 5 hold that thought!
[ 2013.07.14 16:44:53 ] Corpie 5 > lol
[ 2013.07.14 16:45:04 ] random corpie 2(drowning one) > 500mill bounty and counting.
[ 2013.07.14 16:45:23 ] Corpie 1 > THE RAGER, instead of being nice to people and stop to act lieke a 2 year old, you can leave this channel as well

In response to Corpie 5's questioning of THE RAGER if he even knows what a female secks organ is, I respond with a picture! They're worth 1000 words !

[ 2013.07.14 16:45:29 ] Bronto Scorpio > THE RAGER: http://img1.joyreactor.com/pics/post/funny-pictures-auto-Butthurt-Dweller-pokemon-389431.jpeg
[ 2013.07.14 16:45:39 ] Corpie 5 > a c**t is what jippers(travellers) call a hole in the ground for a fire
[ 2013.07.14 16:45:40 ] random corpie 4 > lmfao @ pic
[ 2013.07.14 16:45:50 ] random corpie 5 > Hello Everyone... ☺/ - How is everyone doing today?
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:01 ] Bronto Scorpio > youve been missing awesome stuff random corpie 5


[ 2013.07.14 16:46:04 ] random corpie 4> random corpie 5 - Hey ☻/
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:11 ] random drowning corpie 2 > random corpie 5 Quite a few seem a bit hostile atm.. But I'm doing good :)
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:13 ] Corpie 1 > lol, o/
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:32 ] Corpie 5 > we are all good
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:41 ] random corpie 5 > awww.. let me guess.. hostility? = THE RAGER?
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:45 ] Bronto Scorpio > this guy THE RAGER, who just rage logged btw, posted this rattlesnake pimp fit that included an LAR2
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:56 ] Corpie 5 > indeed
[ 2013.07.14 16:46:57 ] Corpie 3 > awwww he rage logged?
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:01 ] Bronto Scorpio > yes a sec ago
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:03 ] Corpie 3 > that was so much fun
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:12 ] Corpie 5 > thats a new one on me rage logged
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:12 ] Bronto Scorpio > then I calmly asked "large repper?"
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:18 ] Bronto Scorpio > then eh started raging
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:23 ] Corpie 3 > :( best 72m in bounties i ever spent
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:24 ] Bronto Scorpio > his bounty went from 0 to 500mil in 10 mins
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:30 ] Corpie 5 > lol

[ 2013.07.14 16:47:44 ] random corpie 4 > I think his meds are fluctuating... lol
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:46 ] random 6 > man, now I need to go hunt him down.
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:56 ] Corpie 3 > that s**t went right into my bio
[ 2013.07.14 16:47:59 ] Bronto Scorpio > then I found his kb and linked lol stuff where he in a stealth bomber and a cynabal killed a shuttle

[ 2013.07.14 16:48:21 ] Bronto Scorpio > oh man, I need to get the chatlogs and bio em
[ 2013.07.14 16:48:31 ] random 4 > lol =)
[ 2013.07.14 16:48:42 ] Bronto Scorpio > where does the game store the .txt of chatlogs? (evidently I found it)


Oh and I wasn't going to post this however when I logged in, this made me,

You have been added as contact
From: THE RAGER
Sent: 2013.07.14 19:29

THE RAGER has added you as contact with Terrible Standing

you will burn ****!

Also

Bounty placed on you
From: CONCORD
Sent: 2013.07.14 19:34

THE RAGER's OBVIOUS ALT placed 1,000,000 ISK in bounty on your head.


That is all, sorry if this isn't piratey enough, I was lolling hard as It was happening, and I immeadatly showed my brother the in-game logs and he lol'd hard too

This story has omgrage and stuff though, I didn't even have to shoot a bear to make him mad \o/
Relego
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#752 - 2013-07-15 17:56:03 UTC
Does the guy think all mods break like rigs on removal? How the hell does the rocket science of "fit the repper when needed, then redock and fit something relevant" not cross the mind?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=os5TXyJlEMc
Bahamut0503 Andedare
Dutch Legions
Solyaris Chtonium
#753 - 2013-07-16 17:45:49 UTC  |  Edited by: Bahamut0503 Andedare
So i'm doing an DED minding my own bussines until i see a cyclone on short D. I'm thinking, "alright.. this dude wants to play". so i reship in a myrm and call in some friends (he is a pirate so i expect the same from him... turns out he didn't). I warp back to the accelgate and he warps in at a 100. this is what happend.

No tears btw just good sports from this guy ;-) ( i know... i'm not very nice)

EVE System > Channel changed to Local : Villasen
Bahamut0503 Andedare Haary o7
Haary > hello
Bahamut0503 Andedare > 1v1?
Haary > sure
Bahamut0503 Andedare > k i'll wait till u get here
Haary > you can join my fleet and we fight in a safe
Bahamut0503 Andedare > why go al the trouble
Bahamut0503 Andedare > this is practicly a safe :P
Haary > cause you have a drake and bb on standby
Bahamut0503 Andedare > sure... if something hits the fan
Bahamut0503 Andedare > u are a pirate as well u know :P
Haary > fine then, hope you dont dishonor
Haary > as i suspected
Bahamut0503 Andedare > then don;t do it :p

http://eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=18777692

Nicholas Sevcikova > c========B
Haary > thats the most **** excuse btw
Nicholas Sevcikova > gf?
Haary > if you think it was a gf
Haary > be my guest
Nicholas Sevcikova > atron v cyclone - SURE!
Trevor coller > lol
Haary > are you ********?
Bahamut0503 Andedare > yeah that was a bit retardet :P
Haary > yeap
Haary > well another one to the list
Haary > enjoyh
Bahamut0503 Andedare Haary no hard feelings
Bahamut0503 Andedare > just pirates u know
Haary > not at all
Haary > take care
Bahamut0503 Andedare > o7
Relego
Caldari Provisions
Caldari State
#754 - 2013-07-17 19:32:32 UTC
So my effort to extract tears failed, resulting in me just giving some helpful advice instead, but a highsec anomaly may have resulted in one of the most WTF quality lolfit KM's I've ever seen.

http://eve.battleclinic.com/killboard/killmail.php?id=20133167

As it turns out, anom wrecks are the new mining jetcans.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=os5TXyJlEMc
Nightfox BloodRaven
Federal Navy Academy
Gallente Federation
#755 - 2013-07-17 23:11:24 UTC
Praxis Ginimic
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#756 - 2013-07-18 00:11:29 UTC
Nightfox BloodRaven wrote:
http://eve.battleclinic.com/killboard/killmail.php?id=19995532


He didnt have time to talk... sadly...


That is just beautiful! Why wouldn't some one put that sh1t in something tanky?
Bahamut0503 Andedare
Dutch Legions
Solyaris Chtonium
#757 - 2013-07-18 11:44:36 UTC
Nightfox BloodRaven wrote:
http://eve.battleclinic.com/killboard/killmail.php?id=19995532


He didnt have time to talk... sadly...


Nice one Smile
Liam Inkuras
Furnace
#758 - 2013-07-18 20:11:32 UTC
Awesome kill Nightfox. The look on his face when he jumped into you all must have been priceless Lol

I wear my goggles at night.

Any spelling/grammatical errors come complimentary with my typing on a phone
Plastic Psycho
Necro-Economics
#759 - 2013-07-24 04:29:45 UTC
OK, this is just silly.

I warp into a belt, no scout. Miners and wrecks of rats litter the belt. Most of the miners have drones out. One doesn't. And he's mining from maximum stripper range, sitting dead still. I lock him. Scan him. Bumble on over in slow-boat mode. Burn him to the ground. NO ONE so much as twitches until I pull the trigger.

Only once he's in his space-underwear does he do anything, and manages to get his pod away before Concord arrives to melt my boat.

Since I don't have an alt in-system, I boogie myself on over to the station, grab a hauler, and wait out the clock. 'Cause, ya never know. Warping back the belt, I find that my optimism is rewarded - Miners still present, and so is my wreck. And his, too! Strip my wreck, loot his, and go 'Suspect.'

Every miner in the belt packs up and flees. Yes. I just shut down the belt with a suspect Hoarder.

I spend almost my entire 'suspect' timer whistling to myself as I pick up abandoned drones (poor 'lil things - Left all alone in the big scary dark) throughout the belt. Finally, a Drake shows up, but somehow my clunky Hoarder manages to out maneuver him, and i beat him to the station perimeter. He shows up, loaded for bear, just as I dock up. Ten seconds later, my timer runs out, and I merrily go back to the belt and strip it of everything even remotely salable... Concord is in full presence, and now I'm legal. Maybe *someone* will take a crack at me..?Twisted

Sadly, the Drake pilot is sensible and keeps on going. P
Feyd Rautha Harkonnen
Doomheim
#760 - 2013-07-30 16:00:14 UTC