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Agents of The New Order, Recruit New Players into Bumping!

Author
Galaxy Pig
New Order Logistics
CODE.
#1 - 2012-10-03 20:53:07 UTC
The great James 315 hath shown us the way with his only begotten website: www.MinerBumping.com

Let us show our noobs the way.

Think of how much 10 million ISK was to you when you were a noob!

Bumping is hardly skill intensive, but show initiative, buy your new recruits the skill books required.

Explain it as the Highsec Law Enforcement it truly is! They're filling an emergent, noble, and much needed roll in the community!

After they've shown diligence by training for a day or so, reward them with their very first stabber! They'll think it's awesome!

As well as being a lucrative career choice that's easy to get into, it's fun and engaging!

Take initiative, greet the fresh players right at the undock of the starter stations, before they're corrupted by the isk drip of mining!

Highsec is owned by players now. Systems 0.5-1.0 are New Order Territory. All miners and other residents of Highsec must obey The Code. Mining without a permit is dangerous and harmful to the EVE community. See www.MinerBumping.com

James Amril-Kesh
Viziam
Amarr Empire
#2 - 2012-10-03 20:58:10 UTC
I may one day buy a Machariel for the sole purpose of bumping the **** out of things.
Although a Typhoon works pretty nicely for that as well.

Enjoying the rain today? ;)

Gun Gal
Dark Club
#3 - 2012-10-03 21:00:03 UTC
0/10
Erid Tangor
University of Caille
Gallente Federation
#4 - 2012-10-03 21:01:05 UTC
Why do "agents" always talk like they're some character out of a bad Shakespeare play?
Unsuccessful At Everything
The Troll Bridge
#5 - 2012-10-03 21:04:12 UTC
While I approve of ship bumping, I dont approve of the OP terrible marketing strategy. -1/10 to you bad sir.

Since the cessation of their usefulness is imminent, may I appropriate your belongings?

Alavaria Fera
GoonWaffe
#6 - 2012-10-03 21:05:12 UTC
Erid Tangor wrote:
Why do "agents" always talk like they're some character out of a bad Shakespeare play?

I guess Bad Shakespeare Play Online is the new fad in internet spacetheatre.

Triggered by: Wars of Sovless Agression, Bending the Knee, Twisting the Knife, Eating Sov Wheaties, Bombless Bombers, Fizzlesov, Interceptor Fleets, Running Away, GhostTime Vuln, Renters, Bombs, Bubbles ?

Galaxy Pig
New Order Logistics
CODE.
#7 - 2012-10-05 08:30:27 UTC
Oink.

Highsec is owned by players now. Systems 0.5-1.0 are New Order Territory. All miners and other residents of Highsec must obey The Code. Mining without a permit is dangerous and harmful to the EVE community. See www.MinerBumping.com

Graic Gabtar
The Lemon Party
#8 - 2012-10-05 08:34:24 UTC
10 Million seems kind of cheap for a year of being left alone.

...rash; hives; itching;...
Inquisitor Kitchner
The Executives
#9 - 2012-10-05 09:31:52 UTC
Erid Tangor wrote:
Why do "agents" always talk like they're some character out of a bad Shakespeare play?



All Shakespeare plays are bad.

Also well done to you OP, the more tears you can make through gently nudging people the better.

"If an injury has to be done to a man it should be so severe that his vengeance need not be feared." - Niccolo Machiavelli

Jeremy Soikutsu
Kite Co. Space Trucking
#10 - 2012-10-05 09:33:25 UTC  |  Edited by: Jeremy Soikutsu
You twats would be 1000% more sufferable if you just kept this **** simple.

All you need to say is we're running a protection racket in these systems, if you don't pay you're gonna get the **** harassed out of you. Easy.

"Of course you would choose the fun, but you don't lead a relevant entity which has allies." - Colonel Xaven

Dirty Wizard
Doomheim
#11 - 2012-10-05 10:55:24 UTC
Fit afterburner and/or orbit target asteroid.

"New World Order" thwarted.

Well that was easy.

(signature removed due to stupid)

Robert De'Arneth
#12 - 2012-10-05 13:10:48 UTC
I contest weather the op is sane, anyone calling James315 great obviously has lost all touch with reality.

I'm a nerd, you can check my stats!! Skilling Int/Mem at 45 sp per minute is how I mack!     I'm like a lapdog, all bark no bite. 

Tiberious Thessalonia
True Slave Foundations
#13 - 2012-10-05 13:11:53 UTC
Robert De'Arneth wrote:
I contest weather the op is sane, anyone calling James315 great obviously has lost all touch with reality.


I think he's kinda cool... Oops
Anslo
Scope Works
#14 - 2012-10-05 13:48:54 UTC
OK OP, let's say you did this and won, no more miners. They all think mining sucks and do something else and no more minerals show up.

Ship prices rise.

Module prices rise.

Ammo prices rise.

Everything's price rises.

You can't afford new ANYTHING now.

What then?

[center]-_For the Proveldtariat_/-[/center]

De'Veldrin
Republic University
Minmatar Republic
#15 - 2012-10-05 13:52:29 UTC
Anslo wrote:
OK OP, let's say you did this and won, no more miners. They all think mining sucks and do something else and no more minerals show up.

Ship prices rise.

Module prices rise.

Ammo prices rise.

Everything's price rises.

You can't afford new ANYTHING now.

What then?


CCP declares bumping an exploit subject to permaban.
Jita 4-4 undock is empty for the first time in years.

De'Veldrin's Corollary (to Malcanis' Law): Any idea that seeks to limit the ability of a large nullsec bloc to do something in the name of allowing more small groups into sov null will inevitably make it that much harder for small groups to enter sov null.

James 315
Experimental Fun Times Corp RELOADED
CODE.
#16 - 2012-10-06 15:02:08 UTC
Robert De'Arneth wrote:
I contest weather the op is sane, anyone calling James315 great obviously has lost all touch with reality.

How so? X
Mars Theran
Foreign Interloper
#17 - 2012-10-06 16:49:34 UTC  |  Edited by: Mars Theran
James 315 wrote:
Robert De'Arneth wrote:
I contest weather the op is sane, anyone calling James315 great obviously has lost all touch with reality.

How so? X


What's wrong with the weather; it's sunny and relatively cool outside atm. ? Smile

Also, I can't tell if OP is male or female. Not sure that's relevant though. About as relevant as the weather?

Doesn't this also belong in some recruiting forum, and shouldn't the OP have some response besides, "Oink." ? ..and it would probably also be appropriate if the OP was also in the Corp that was recruiting, or did I miss something?

Where's a trollface when you need one?

Also, this is good*: http://www.cracked.com/funny-5111-internet-troll/

*May contain explicit material unintended for less than mature audiences.
zubzubzubzubzubzubzubzub
Aziesta
Binal Extensions
Xagenic Freymvork
#18 - 2012-10-06 17:09:14 UTC
So this is what happens when role players get angry? You were tired of being bullied and made fun of, and decided to get back at those meanies. But real combat takes skill and effort, costs ISK, and you might lose. So instead you decide to pick on those stupid miners, because hey, that's what everyone else does, and you know they won't stand up to you.
Braxus Deninard
Hard Knocks Inc.
Hard Knocks Citizens
#19 - 2012-10-06 17:21:42 UTC
Robert De'Arneth wrote:
I contest weather the op is sane, anyone calling James315 great obviously has lost all touch with reality.


This so much. OP has to be one of the dumbest people I know as well, for the reasons stated above.
Praxis Ginimic
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#20 - 2012-10-06 17:31:33 UTC
Actually...mafioso style "protection" rackets are a generally missing feature of high sec mining ops. I like the idea. Not too long ago I suggested a security style anti-can-flipper corp and got told it was a dumb idea. Rightly so, it was a dumb idea. Us noobs have lots of dumb ideas. It now occurs to me that what I was missing was the threat. "If you don't pay for our protection I GUARANTEE you will regret the decision." Genius. Where do I sign up. On the other hand, screw you guys and your weird role playing. I'm Italian, I know damn well how to set up an EVE mafia.Pirate...by this time next year there will be a Guido smiley with a crooked fedora
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