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Janitor Intelligence Agency: Needs You!
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Wabisuke
Janitor Intelligence Agency
#1 - 2012-09-01 15:31:17 UTC
Good pilots of Eve,

we at J.I.A greet you!

For years us Janitors have worked in the background cleaning up your cans of Quafe and emptying the bio tanks after a new clone is activated.

We have been with you in Empire, making sure your Captain quarters are clean and tidy.
We have followed you down to 0.0, where your structures needed much needed maintenance after hostile fleets have shot at it.
Most of you wont notice, but we are on most ships as well. Have you never wonder why your ships are always this clean?

For years we have worked in the background, behind the scenes, going unnoticed.
In all the years we been with you we have seen the never ending expansion you pilots make in Eve and much more.
Always creating new structures in space that will need us Janitors to keep them clean.

After all these years, we are struggling.
Yes. For the first time in our janitorial history, we ask for your help.

Yes, your help!
We seek donations from you Eve pilots, so us janitors can do what we love to do, and have been doing for 6 years now.
Cleaning your mess!

We ask that if you have any Janitors hanging around, send them to us so we can put them to good use!
They will receive an excellent contract and a great dental plan to boot!!

And after that, we can return them to work for you, behind the scenes, keeping Eve a cleaner Universe one station at the time.

Thank you for your patience,

Wabisuke
Head Janitor of Janitor Intelligence Agency
Shadow Bear
The Scope
Gallente Federation
#2 - 2012-09-01 16:06:25 UTC
Obviously we need to support this. I have many janitors. These janitors have been cleaning up after my hanger parties for years. After all, who doesn't have a few dozen exotic dancers, quafe and various other luxuries waiting for them everytime they dock?

Big cheers to the janitors for all their hard work.
Rana Ash
Gradient
Electus Matari
#3 - 2012-09-01 16:32:31 UTC
If you are cleaning the CQ's you are doing a very poor job of it, as for my ships and hangars.
I would never let a janitor near them, i have way more specialized people for that..
Ruby Amatucci
Tomorrowland Orphanage
#4 - 2012-09-01 22:11:07 UTC
Janitors don't manage themselves! Are you really a janitor?

Maybe you're broken. GO - BACK - TO -THE - JANITOR - BAY - AND - POWER - DOWN - FOR - REPAIRS. You really shouldn't try to think independently.
Wabisuke
Janitor Intelligence Agency
#5 - 2012-09-02 11:14:21 UTC
Greetings.

I can assure you us Janitors are real people just like yourself.
Yes, we might not travel trough space in mighty war ships and do all those amazing things, but people we still are.

And Miss.Ash, we do clean those every other day.
But alas, of all the 4 race's it is yours that is the most difficult to deal with, always such a mess please consider this next time, that us Janitors cannot spent all our time in your CQ.

This is why this post was made, a shout for help, to help us help you.
If we are able to aquire us more Janitors, we can finally see to things like that dont happen for the Minmatar as well.

They too deserve clean and tidy place's to life after all1

Thank you for your patience,

Wabisuke
Head Janitor of Janitor Intelligence Agency
Ruby Amatucci
Tomorrowland Orphanage
#6 - 2012-09-02 14:24:12 UTC
Awh.

I'm sorry, sweetie. I'm really sorry, but you're not a real person like me, not if you're a janitor. I am a True Citizen. Janitors are Auxiliary Citizens. There's a difference. Do you see?

No, you don't see, do you?

Stupid Ruby. Talking to janitors, now? Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Kazzzi
Heathen Legion
Iron Men of the Hood
#7 - 2012-09-02 17:58:20 UTC
Wabisuke wrote:
Have you never wonder why your ships are always this clean?


Fedos. They work wonders and they make better conversation than most capsuleers.
Rhiannon Dellacorte
Liberty Vanguard
#8 - 2012-09-03 00:24:48 UTC
Ruby Amatucci wrote:
Awh.

I'm sorry, sweetie. I'm really sorry, but you're not a real person like me, not if you're a janitor. I am a True Citizen. Janitors are Auxiliary Citizens. There's a difference. Do you see?

No, you don't see, do you?

Stupid Ruby. Talking to janitors, now? Stupid, stupid, stupid.


I don't know if you noticed this or not, but not everybody lives in Nation.

Rules of Acquisition #261

A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience.
Varik Anstian
Sebiestor Tribe
Minmatar Republic
#9 - 2012-09-03 00:46:16 UTC
Kazzzi wrote:
Wabisuke wrote:
Have you never wonder why your ships are always this clean?


Fedos. They work wonders and they make better conversation than most capsuleers.



Fedos do work wonders. But they stink. Really bad. That being said, I don't trust these "janitors." They're probably spies or assassins.....

I'll stick with my fedos.
Wabisuke
Janitor Intelligence Agency
#10 - 2012-09-03 01:39:32 UTC
Varik Anstian wrote:
Kazzzi wrote:
Wabisuke wrote:
Have you never wonder why your ships are always this clean?


Fedos. They work wonders and they make better conversation than most capsuleers.



Fedos do work wonders. But they stink. Really bad. That being said, I don't trust these "janitors." They're probably spies or assassins.....

I'll stick with my fedos.


I would like to say that it was never proven that Janitors and Assassins are the same, so I can assure you, there is nothing to fear of us!

Wabisuke
Head Janitor of Janitor Intelligence Agency
Ruby Amatucci
Tomorrowland Orphanage
#11 - 2012-09-03 04:52:32 UTC
Rhiannon Dellacorte wrote:
I don't know if you noticed this or not, but not everybody lives in Nation.

It's not about where you live, it's about what you are. A janitor is a janitor, just like a drone is a drone.

I know you empire people like to pretend that your Auxiliaries are actual people and dress them up and have tea with them and I don't know what else, but sometimes you take it too far, and it stops being fun and cute and starts being creepy, okay? Like scary holo creepy.

Wabisuke has even confirmed that its purpose is to clean up after people, okay? It's not a person. Can't you people even drop the pretense for just one post?
Rhiannon Dellacorte
Liberty Vanguard
#12 - 2012-09-03 20:46:44 UTC
Ruby Amatucci wrote:
Rhiannon Dellacorte wrote:
I don't know if you noticed this or not, but not everybody lives in Nation.

It's not about where you live, it's about what you are. A janitor is a janitor, just like a drone is a drone.

I know you empire people like to pretend that your Auxiliaries are actual people and dress them up and have tea with them and I don't know what else, but sometimes you take it too far, and it stops being fun and cute and starts being creepy, okay? Like scary holo creepy.

Wabisuke has even confirmed that its purpose is to clean up after people, okay? It's not a person. Can't you people even drop the pretense for just one post?


Wow.

And I'm the creepy one?

Rules of Acquisition #261

A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience.
Infomorph Nikilaiki Ruutarhara
Doomheim
#13 - 2012-09-03 20:56:02 UTC
Ruby Amatucci wrote:
Wabisuke has even confirmed that its purpose is to clean up after people, okay? It's not a person. Can't you people even drop the pretense for just one post?

Few outside of Nation see individuals only in regards to the role they fill in society. Even within Nation those who show promise are given the means to be more. A lowly janitor with the mind to see complex equations, but never given a chance elsewhere, can become something great, non?
Ruby Amatucci
Tomorrowland Orphanage
#14 - 2012-09-03 22:34:13 UTC
Infomorph Nikilaiki Ruutarhara wrote:
Few outside of Nation see individuals only in regards to the role they fill in society. Even within Nation those who show promise are given the means to be more. A lowly janitor with the mind to see complex equations, but never given a chance elsewhere, can become something great, non?

Well, that's true, of course, but you have to come from a really strange place, or have teachers who aren't doing their job, or be evil or dangerous or something, if your mind can do amazing things and you're still made into a janitor.

I don't know if anyone still remembers, but I bought four hundred janitors once and had them all upgraded into parents for the orphans. And that was mostly a success.

It takes a lot of work to do it, though, and I still wouldn't call them real people, not really. They are...peopler? More people-y? - than janitors, but still not quite real, even though they are good for the children.

Besides, you can't be a parent and a janitor at the same time. If a janitor becomes more than a janitor, it stops being a janitor. Do you see?
Ruby Amatucci
Tomorrowland Orphanage
#15 - 2012-09-03 23:40:37 UTC
Oh, wait! I see what you're saying, now, Friend Niki!

Wabisuke, have you ever dreamed of turning into a real person someday? You should come and see me. Maybe you do have enough promise.

Oh, I love it when wishes come true!
Wabisuke
Janitor Intelligence Agency
#16 - 2012-09-04 10:41:28 UTC
It saddens me to see you disregard for us Janitors continues.

However, your discontent may be for us, know this, that even though you feel the need to look down upon on Janitors, we will continue do what we most, and keep your structures running, your CQ clean, your hangers shiny.

But we do not have any intention to come and seek " enlightenment " from one such as yourself, so I am afraid I shall respectly decline that offer.

Now if you would excuse me, I believe somebody spilled a drink in the station, and requires my attention.

Wabisuke
Head Janitor Of Janitor Intelligence Agency
Red Miromme
Scarlet Ventures
#17 - 2012-09-04 17:00:15 UTC
Oh behalf of myself and the Jin-Mei Mercantile Club, I wish you the best of luck in all of your endeavors! Janitors are a vital aspect of all societies, and they deserve support and respect for doing the jobs that no one else wants to do.

Janitors also know how to throw one helluva party, which makes them blue in my book!

Best,

Red Miromme
Chief Diplomat & Recruitment Officer, Jin-Mei Mercantile Club

Red Miromme Chief Diplomat and Recruitment Officer, Jin-Mei Mercantile Club
Tiberious Thessalonia
True Slave Foundations
#18 - 2012-09-04 17:52:09 UTC
Wabisuke wrote:
It saddens me to see you disregard for us Janitors continues.

However, your discontent may be for us, know this, that even though you feel the need to look down upon on Janitors, we will continue do what we most, and keep your structures running, your CQ clean, your hangers shiny.

But we do not have any intention to come and seek " enlightenment " from one such as yourself, so I am afraid I shall respectly decline that offer.

Now if you would excuse me, I believe somebody spilled a drink in the station, and requires my attention.

Wabisuke
Head Janitor Of Janitor Intelligence Agency


Allow me to clear up some confusion:

I believe Ms. Amatucci is having trouble with the concept that you would allow actually intelligent and sapient beings waste their potential by allowing them to be Janitors, a job that can be handled entirely capably and even happilly by something that is nothing more than a machine.

I mean, if the job that needs doing is nothing other than "Clean up after humans", then why would you need something capable of thought to do it? Just get a drone, give it an image of how a place is supposed to look, and program it to make that space like that image, and program into it the methods by which it will be allowed to do so.

Then you can take the people who were formerly janitors and teach them an actually productive trade, or give them time to learn the arts, or they can just spend time thinking.

The error in Ms. Amatucci's thinking here is that she can't see that other empires let themselves be run so inefficiently.
Infomorph Nikilaiki Ruutarhara
Doomheim
#19 - 2012-09-04 18:06:47 UTC
Ruby Amatucci wrote:
Friend

You keep using that word, little one.

I may not be an enemy of Nation, but I am not a "Friend of Nation" either. You in particular I find... aggravating. No offense; you simply appear to lack basic understanding of concepts necessary to make informed decisions regarding your allegiance.

My sincere apologies in attempting to deal with you as an equal. It will not happen again, little one.
Wabisuke
Janitor Intelligence Agency
#20 - 2012-09-04 22:54:16 UTC
Tiberious Thessalonia wrote:
Wabisuke wrote:
It saddens me to see you disregard for us Janitors continues.

However, your discontent may be for us, know this, that even though you feel the need to look down upon on Janitors, we will continue do what we most, and keep your structures running, your CQ clean, your hangers shiny.

But we do not have any intention to come and seek " enlightenment " from one such as yourself, so I am afraid I shall respectly decline that offer.

Now if you would excuse me, I believe somebody spilled a drink in the station, and requires my attention.

Wabisuke
Head Janitor Of Janitor Intelligence Agency


Allow me to clear up some confusion:

I believe Ms. Amatucci is having trouble with the concept that you would allow actually intelligent and sapient beings waste their potential by allowing them to be Janitors, a job that can be handled entirely capably and even happilly by something that is nothing more than a machine.

I mean, if the job that needs doing is nothing other than "Clean up after humans", then why would you need something capable of thought to do it? Just get a drone, give it an image of how a place is supposed to look, and program it to make that space like that image, and program into it the methods by which it will be allowed to do so.

Then you can take the people who were formerly janitors and teach them an actually productive trade, or give them time to learn the arts, or they can just spend time thinking.

The error in Ms. Amatucci's thinking here is that she can't see that other empires let themselves be run so inefficiently.


Good sir,

I do applaud you for your effort in this matter, so do not consider this to be meant rude.

But I assume your a pilot of a mighty war ship, which is pilot by a human, would it not be much more efficiently to have a more advance AI pilot instead, yes, it would.

However some things we prefer to give a more " human " touch to, and thus us Janitors are the same in that aspect.

I thank those that have said kind words of support as well, it make's us Janitors know that there are people that do appreciated the work done by us.

Wabisuke
Head Janitor Of Janitor Intelligence Agency
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